


Blood Sugar (Part I)

by JeSuisPrest



Series: Blood Sugar [1]
Category: Outlander & Related Fandoms, Outlander (TV), Outlander Series - Diana Gabaldon
Genre: 90s Jamie and Claire, 90s Nostalgia, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Child Death, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-27
Updated: 2020-08-20
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:29:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 51,419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24405049
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JeSuisPrest/pseuds/JeSuisPrest
Summary: An Outlander modern AU set in 1991, wherein modern language studies student James Fraser meets pre-med Claire Beauchamp at a Red Hot Chili Peppers concert on a November night in New York City.
Relationships: Claire Beauchamp/Jamie Fraser
Series: Blood Sugar [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1878061
Comments: 624
Kudos: 535





	1. C’mon Girl

**Author's Note:**

> *Roseland Ballroom is a famous concert hall in NYC’s Hell’s Kitchen District. The Red Hot Chili Peppers played a two night stint there in November 1991 as part of their Blood Sugar Sex Magik tour.
> 
> I was inspired to write this story when I listened to the BSSM album again for the first time in ages and the song “Breaking the Girl” reminded me of Jamie & Claire.
> 
> The scene in which Jamie pulls Claire out of a rogue mosh pit was based on something that actually happened to me at a concert in the summer of 1998, but, alas, I was saved by my friend Derick, and not a tall, red-headed Highlander.
> 
> I plan for this to be a multi-chapter series full of fluff and smut, and maybe a bit of angst – I’ll just have to see where the characters take me. 
> 
> Thank you so much to Erin, Elle, Mags, CJ, and Elin who beta’d and reviewed this for me. And to all my other friends who encouraged me – you’re the best!

Roseland Ballroom*, NYC

November 11, 1991

The blaring sounds of Red Hot Chili Peppers cut through the air of concert hall, the vibrations filling Jamie’s body. They were halfway through their set and showed no signs of letting up. He jumped up and down on the beer-soaked floor, the flannel tied around his waist bouncing, his t-shirt soaked, his red, sweat slicked curls plastered to his forehead. He let the music absorb him, closing his eyes, allowing it to take hold of his being.

Lost in himself, he hadn’t noticed that he had drifted away from his friends. Every time he opened his eyes, all he could see was the stage, the musicians, the pulsing light show. He barely took notice of the mosh pit forming near him, side-stepping slightly and using his tall, muscular build to deflect any stragglers, until he heard a shriek - barely audible above the rest of the noise - but very clearly not the shriek of a woman about to bare her breasts or throw her panties on stage. 

He looked into the mosh pit, quickly trying to assess the situation. What he saw was a small woman, squatting down, trying to edge her way out of the mob of men who were pushing, pulling, and stomping with no regard for anything or anyone around them. It took him only one long stride to reach the mob. His strong arms easily shoved aside several of the revelers until he reached her. 

She was looking down, clearly panicked and unsure of how to get herself out of the predicament she was currently in. Seeing no other way to get her attention over the cacophony around them, he bent forward, scooped one arm under her very round buttocks -  _ the roundest he'd ever seen in fact _ \- placed his other hand around her shoulder, his hand braced on her back and neatly threw her over his shoulder.

At first she was too shocked to protest, but that didn't last long. By the time Jamie had managed to weave his way through the crowd to the back of the venue, she was screeching and thrashing about, pounding her wee fists against his back. He chuckled at this as he placed her on the ground near the back of the building, holding her shoulders to steady her while she regained her bearings. 

"What the bloody hell do you think you're doing?" she asked indignantly.  _ Nobody does indignation quite like the English _ , he thought, smiling to himself, hearing his father's voice in his head.

"Weel I thought I was savin' your life, but if you dinna appreciate it, I'll just be on my way."

"Hmph."

"You're welcome, anyway," he said and then, teasing, he stuck his leg out in front of him and took a bow. "James Alexander Malcolm MacKenzie Fraser; your servant madam."

The gesture caused her to relax, eliciting a small smile. Her eyes searched his face, trying to decide if she could trust him.  _ Christ,  _ he thought,  _ she's got the most lovely eyes. I've never seen eyes that color before. Like whisky. _

"Well that's quite a lot of names to remember," she said finally. "Claire Elizabeth Beauchamp." She stuck her hand out and he grasped it, planning to give her a cordial hand shake and be on his way. But when he touched her hand, it was like a bolt of electricity, shooting through to all his nerve endings. He tried to be subtle about it but could not help giving her a quick once over.  _ Christ. She's the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. _

She had a wee waist line, accentuated by her cropped Ramones t-shirt. He gulped, realizing how thin the fabric was as his eyes trailed upward, briefly settling on round, perky breasts. He licked his lips subconsciously and finally settled on her face. Glowing eyes and the softest hint of freckles topped off by a large mass of rich mahogany curls that framed her face. The look in her eyes told him she had felt the same electric shock, was experiencing the same sensation through her body and his hand lingered, holding hers for a few moments, before she giggled softly and gently pulled it back.

"Well, Claire Elizabeth Beauchamp, it's a pleasure to meet you." 

She glanced over his shoulder, nervously shifting her eyes. "I suppose I've lost my friends," she said absent-mindedly.

"Aye, as have I." He cleared his throat. "If ye like, I'll watch the rest of the concert with ye. Protect ye from roaming mosh pits."

This time she threw her head back and laughed, her curls bouncing behind her. "I suppose I do need a bodyguard. Let's go."

They headed back to the crowd. Jamie resisted the urge to grab her by the hand, but he noticed, with a small satisfaction, that she had placed her hand lightly on his back while she followed him. Suddenly, she tugged at his shirt. He stopped and turned around. "I don't want to go up front again!" She shouted. "Let's just stay back here!"

Jamie nodded and took a few steps back to join her. They stood there together, allowing themselves to be wrapped up in the music again, dancing side by side, though Jamie's wame did flips every time her arm brushed up against his.  _ Christ man, get a hold of yourself.  _ He glanced at her and suddenly realized that she couldn't see anything except the sweaty shirt of the man in front of them. He leaned down and shouted directly in her ear. "Ye cannae see a damn thing, can ye?" She shook her head vigorously and then lifted her hands, palms up in a shrug. "No, we cannae have that!" He squatted down in front of her, lowering his head. 

She hesitated only a moment before climbing onto his strong shoulders. He stood up and suddenly the world opened around her. She had never felt such exhilaration and her stomach clenched delightfully, her senses overloaded. The lights of the stage blazed on her and she threw her hands up and screamed, completely trusting that this stranger would not let her fall. The air was even cooler up here and the oxygen itself, absent from the suffocation of all the bodies packed into one room, ripped through her and made her delightfully light-headed. 

Jamie held onto her legs and laughed when she let herself go, hearing the absolute delight in her scream. He would stand like this for hours, neck aching, if it made this woman happy, her hands periodically shooting up in the air and then resting back again on the top of his head. He was keenly aware of the fact that her sex was pressed against the back of his head and he let out a groan, grateful for the roar of the crowd. She leaned her head down and shouted in his ear, "Isn't this the most amazing night ever?"

He nodded.  _ Aye, it truly is. _

***

After the encore, Jamie finally squatted so Claire could get down. She accomplished this as though she were playing leap frog, pushing herself off his shoulders and landing in front of him. He took the opportunity to admire her ass again; so round and plump, it was all he could do to not reach out and squeeze it. She turned around then, eyes still lit up with joy. "Thank you so much! That was just amazing." Jamie straightened up, stretching his neck involuntarily. "Oh! I've hurt you! I am so very sorry. I should have gotten down earlier."

"Dinna fash, Sassenach. I'll be fine."

They started to follow the crowd toward the exit and this time Claire grabbed his hand. He knew it was for her fear of being swallowed by the crowd, but it pleased him immensely all the same. He turned and gave her a smile and the one she returned melted his insides like hot lava. She smiled with her whole face, her eyes glowing, nose crinkled. He thought he had never seen such a beautiful sight in all his life and determined then that, in whatever short time they had left together, he would do anything to make that smile appear.

_ Like the sun coming out on a rainy day.  _

They made their way forward, a mass of bodies moving as one. As they stepped out into the cold, November air, Claire took a deep breath. Jamie turned to her then, concern covering his face, "Do you no' see your friends then?" 

She shook her head. "No, I suppose they consider me a lost cause. I'm not surprised. I have a habit of wandering off."

Jamie gave a light chuckle, "I suppose I shouldn't find that a surprise wi' a lass who finds trouble as ye do." His brow furrowed and Claire could tell he was considering what to say next. "Can I see you home then?"

Claire waved a hand dismissively. "Don't worry about it. I don't have to go very far. It will be nice to walk a bit in the cool air."

"I'll no' have you walking the streets of New York alone at night. I'll walk wi' ye." His tone was firm. He was telling, not asking.

"All right then. This way." Claire gestured with her head in the direction she wanted him to walk. Jamie casually took her hand, a subconscious gesture she was sure, and she didn't pull away.

They walked in silence for some time. The air was chilled, but it felt refreshing after the thick steamy air of the concert hall. After covering a few blocks, they both spoke at the same time.

"Would ye-"

"I don't-"

Claire smiled shyly. "You first."

"Well, I was just thinking that I'm not ready for the night to be o'er just yet. Will ye have a drink wi' me?" His voice was casual, but Claire could see the eagerness on his face. 

"Yes, that sounds lovely."

***

They were tucked together in a small booth near the back of a smoky, dim bar. Claire had surprised Jamie by ordering a whisky, echoing his own order. She sat closer to him than was necessary, leaning her head close to his with an intimacy that made Jamie's heart race.

"Modern language studies?" she asked, her warm smile showing genuine interest. "What does one do with that?"

"Weel," he answered, rubbing his chin in consideration. "I dinna ken yet what I'm going to do with it. But I've a talent for it, and it seems I may as well go to school for something I'm already good at."

"Really?" Her eyes sparkled with interest. "How many languages do you speak?"

"Let's see. There's the Gàidhlig, of course, I grew up wi' that alongside English. Latin, Greek, French. A wee bit of Chinese. And I'm just starting to learn Arabic, so seven I suppose," he concluded with a small shrug.

"Oh, is that all?" she replied, suppressing the desire to laugh at his causal manner. "Say something to me in one of your languages."

"Which one?" he asked, playfully swirling his glass and taking a sip. 

"Surprise me."

"All right then." He paused, considering. He cleared his throat, looked directly in her eyes and spoke softly, earnestly, " _ Tha thu brèagha, mo nighean donn _ ."

Claire was still for a moment, considering. Jamie's hand was resting on the table and she put her own over it. When she spoke, it was barely a whisper, "What does that mean?

Jamie smiled at her, reaching out to push a stray curl from her face, twirling it between his fingers for just a moment before letting it go. "It's just an old Scottish saying; it doesna translate."

"Well, it sounded lovely." 

He leaned in close, his lips hovering over hers, "You look verra lovely." She moved almost imperceptibly, but enough to close the gap between them. Their lips met, no hesitation or timidity. He gently prodded with his tongue until her lips parted, and she could drink him in. He placed his hand on her head and gently grabbed a fistful of her curls. Their tongues danced and Claire found her hands on Jamie's thigh, fingers digging into the firm flesh. 

He pulled away first, biting his lip and breathing heavily. They stared at each other for a moment, regaining their senses. Claire broke her gaze and lifted her glass to her lips and then pulled it away, and looked at it with a frown. "Looks like ye'll need a refill," Jamie said. He took her glass from her hand, picked his up, and slid out of the booth without another word.

Claire sat back in the booth, brushing her hair from her face, steadying her breath. Who was this Jamie Fraser, anyway? He was easy on the eyes, no doubt about that, brilliant red curls on top of chiseled, Viking-like features, tall with an effortless strength. But no, that wasn't quite it. There was something about the way he looked at her, as if he truly saw  _ her _ , the person she was in her most secret and sacred places.  _ Christ, get yourself together, Beauchamp. You just met the man. _

Jamie slid into the booth, handing Claire a fresh drink. "Well then," he said, taking a sip of his own drink, a crooked smile on his lips. "Ye havena told me what yer studying yet."

Claire straightened up, holding the whisky glass with both hands. "I'm pre-med at NYU."

"A doctor is it? Verra impressive." He tilted his glass in a small salute.

"A surgeon, if all goes well." She returned the gesture and sipped. Between the whisky and his nearness, her head was beginning to swim.

"I've no doubt it will," he said before clearing his throat. "And how did a Sassenach such as yerself find her way to New York?"

"Sassenach? What is that? You called me that before."

"Och, it's just a Scots word for Englishman, an outlander."

She smiled. "Well, I suppose we're both outlanders here. How long have you been living in the states?"

"My family emigrated here when I was about nine. My mother," the last word came out in a choked sound and he took a sip of his drink before going on. "My mother died the year before." His voice lowered. "There was a fire; the house was destroyed. We lost everything." Jamie felt Claire’s hand rest upon his and he flipped his hand over and intertwined their fingers. He sat up a little straighter, his voice regaining its strong timbre. "So, my father brought us here, my sister Janet and me. He and his best friend, John, bought a farm together upstate and he and his son Ian came wi' us. Ian and I were thick as thieves." He chuckled, almost to himself, and took another drink. 

"Where is Ian now? Is he away at school too?" Claire asked gently.

"Och, no. The wee fool went and marrit my sister." Claire laughed at the way he pretended to act annoyed but was so obviously pleased. "They've one bairn already and another on the way." He looked at her, squinting his eyes a bit, "But now I see ye've distracted me from my original question. How did  _ you _ find your way here."

Claire looked down at her glass, "England wasn’t my home. Not really. My parents died in a car accident when I was five. My Uncle became my guardian." She felt the way Jamie's thumb instinctively began to caress her hand. "He was an archeologist and we lived wherever his work took him. When I started high school, I came here for boarding school. Uncle Lamb insisted I get a proper education. Once it was time to pick a college, I found I rather liked the city, so I stayed." She said this last part with a small shrug, as if she were telling him she had walked to the park because she didn't have anything better to do.

They both emptied their glasses and Jamie looked at Claire thoughtfully. He could tell she was tired and not just a little bit drunk. She had matched him drink for drink all night, and she was but a wee thing half his size. "Weel, I ken I should get ye home now, lass. It's verra late."

***

They walked together, Jamie with one strong arm around Claire’s waist; the poor lass was practically asleep on her feet. After another block they arrived in front of a brownstone and Claire fumbled in her pockets for her keys. They ascended the steps to the front door and she turned to face him. "Thank you for rescuing me, Jamie. And thank you for a wonderful evening."

"Aye, it was a fine evening. I'm glad I met ye, Claire." She turned to put the key in the lock, first pushing her hair out of her face and gathering it off to one side, revealing a small glimpse of her elegant neck. She fumbled, jingling the keys, and muttered under her breath, "Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ." In the yellow glow of the street light, he could see her cheeks flush pink and he couldn't hold back anymore. He pulled her away from the door and stepped closer to her so that their bodies were inches apart; electricity passing between them, as if their very nerve-endings were speaking to each other. He moved toward her and then stopped himself. "I would like verra much to kiss ye, Claire. May I?" 

As means of giving permission, she reached up and pulled his head down to her, tasting his mouth eagerly. "Oh god," he groaned, when she gave him a brief respite to catch her own breath. He rested his forehead against hers for just a moment, staring into the depth of her whisky eyes. "Christ, yer the most beautiful woman I've ever seen," he told her before crashing his lips into hers again. 

This time, it was apparent that neither of them had any intention of stopping. Her hands were everywhere; pawing at his chest, his back, his neck. He broke away from her lips and placed his hand on the back of her neck as she emitted a rather loud "Oh!" His hands roamed, finding purchase on her waist, at her hips, and then boldly, up and under her shirt. She cried out again as his fingers found their way inside her bra. Her hands reached down, landing on his hips, pulling him in closer and he made up his mind to get her inside that apartment as soon as humanly possible. 

He pulled his mouth away from hers and whispered, "Where are the keys?"

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. Soul to Squeeze

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jamie and Claire continue their evening getting to know each other under unexpected circumstances.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you are enjoying this fun trip down memory lane as much as I am!
> 
> Thank you so much to Erin for beta'ing this for me!!!!

Somehow, Jamie had managed to grab the keys that had fallen to the ground and get the front door unlocked, all while barely missing a beat of kissing her. He gently led Claire through the open door, his hands on her hips and then roaming to her bottom. "Christ, ye have the roundest arse I've ever seen." He closed the door with a swift backward kick and pinned her to the wall in the narrow foyer.

Claire responded by thrusting her pelvis against his and making a small sound, almost a mew. Jamie's hands were roaming, unable to decide where to focus his attention first, as Claire settled for putting her arms around his neck and letting him do as he would. His lips tasted like intoxicating whisky and his skin had an earthy, rich scent that Claire drank in as she put her mouth on his neck, sucking. When she used her teeth, just the slightest nibble to test the waters, he let out a low groan that seemed to emit from down low within him.

He had her shirt off by then and was massaging one breast through her bra while the other hand groped frantically behind her in an attempt to remove it. She gently pushed him away and took care of it with a flourish.

Having had a moment to get his bearings of the surroundings, Jamie noticed a small console table to his left. He hoisted Claire on top of it and quickly got to business. With one hand he massaged her left nipple, taut already against her ivory skin, and lowered his mouth to the right, suckling gently at first and then, seeing how she began to rock her hips, with more force, drinking her in like an oasis in a desert.

Jamie could feel her hands at the waistband of his jeans, fingers fumbling for the button. He groaned and found his way back to her mouth again, grabbing a fistful of curls in one hand while the other assisted her with his button and fly. Her hips were eager for him, rocking as he dropped his pants and boxers at the same time, kicking off his shoes. He was more than ready and started at once to work on her own pants.

Her body hummed and ached. She had never in her life felt such a strong _need_ for a man. Never had she been with a man and felt as if they didn't join, her body would cease to exist. He had her jeans undone, hand reaching and searching for her most private place, and she was ready to give it to him; this stranger she had met merely hours before.

His fingers reached their goal and she jolted as they rubbed and explored. _This is not going to take long,_ she thought as she did her best to scoot her pants down to give Jamie more room to explore. His fingers found the right spot and she thrust her hips forward, one hand around his neck while the other searched for a place to brace herself. "Don't stop! Right there!" she cried out, the pressure building as an inferno raged through her body.

Jamie had never seen a woman so ready. He had planned to simply warm her up a bit, but when he saw what his fingers were doing to her, he went on eagerly. She squeaked and writhed and panted his name. He watched as her face tensed, her thigh muscles and abdomen trembling and then all at once she lost herself, head thrown back. She made a sharp cry and convulsed in his hand.

Just then, the console table gave way, and she went crashing down with it. Her cry of pleasure morphed into a shriek of surprise as she hit the floor. Jamie knelt beside her, searching her for damage. "Are ye all right, Sassenach? Are ye hurt?"

Claire looked up, met his eyes, and burst out laughing. "Well, I have a table leg nearly up my arse, but other than that I think I'm all right." Jamie stood up and pulled his boxers back on quickly before reaching out a hand to help her up. She let out a groan and her hand instinctively went to her tailbone.

Jamie's brow furrowed and he reached down to grab her shirt off the floor. "Here, lass. I'll no' hae ye injured _and_ freezing."

She pulled the shirt over her head, laughing. "Leave it to me! The first time I have a man in my apartment in two years, and I break my ass."

"Do ye think it's broken then?" He started to turn her around to get a look, but then thought better of it, crossing his arms across his chest for lack of anything better to do with them. "How can ye tell if ye've broken yer arse, anyway?"

"I suppose an X-ray. But Jamie, it's really not that bad. I've probably just bruised it." To demonstrate, she bent down to pick up her panties. When she straightened back up, though, she hissed through her teeth.

"I dinna ken the difference between a broken and a bruised tailbone, but ye've hurt yerself pretty bad there, Sassenach. Should we mebbe take a wee trip to the hospital just to be sure?" The look on his face was so sincerely worried, Claire felt her heart melting.

"No, really, I'll be OK. Just...well, will you help me to bed?" Her cheeks flushed, as if he hadn't just had his fingers buried in her panties five minutes earlier.

Jamie put an arm around her slightly bent waist as she led him down the narrow hallway. They passed her kitchen and living area on the left, the latter furnished with a wooden futon, wicker bowl chair, and bean bag. On the wall hung a Grateful Dead tapestry and the apartment had the faintest scent of patchouli. As they walked further down, Jamie noted a bathroom to the left, catty corner to the room she was leading him into. She groped for the light switch and found it. The overhead light was still dim, but at least it wasn't pitch black anymore. Her unmade bed was directly to their right and the room was small, scarcely room for a dresser at the other end. The walls were decorated with posters: Nirvana, Pink Floyd, a still from _A Clockwork Orange_ , and David Bowie in the Ziggy Stardust era.

"If you're finished assessing my interior design skills, you could help me get into bed," Claire spoke gently.

"Aye. I was just thinkin that it's a good think ye've got good taste in music and movies or I'd have tae leave ye tae fend fer yerself." He looked at her, so bonnie in nothing but her t-shirt, and smiled. "Now, can ye get yerself in the bed or do I need to hoist ye in?"

"I think some hoisting might be in order."

Gently, Jamie reached down with one arm to scoop under her legs, with the other arm firmly around her back. Ever so carefully he placed her on the bed, lying on her side. "Now," his cheeks flushed, "Let me see about gettin yer underthings on before ye lose all yer dignity."

She laughed at that, "I don't think dignity is much of an option at this point. Here, if you start them at the bottom, I can…" With much difficulty and giggles, they managed to get the panties in place.

"Let me see if I can find ye something fer yer wee bum," Jamie said, leaving the room in search of an ice pack. He first headed to the front door, ensuring it was locked and bolted. He then headed back toward the kitchen, stopping to pick up the remnants of the console table on his way. He found a trash bag under the sink of the small kitchen and placed the debris inside, tying it neatly and putting it next to the garbage can. He opened up her freezer and found nothing but a bottle of vodka and empty ice cube trays. Muttering to himself, he filled the ice cube trays and grabbed the bottle. Finding a linen cabinet next to the bathroom, he wrapped the bottle in a thin towel and returned to find her curled up on the bed, tears streaming down her face. "Does it hurt that bad, lass?" he asked, stooping over to move her damp curls away from her face.

She sniffled. "Just a bit. Did you find any ice?"

"No, this will have to do." He crawled up on the bed and gently placed the bottle behind her. "Just lay back a wee bit...there ye go." She gasped and then sighed a little. "It's a good thing the bottle is nearly full. It should bide for a little while at least."

"Thank you, Jamie," she said, reaching her hand out to him. "Would you...would you stay the night? In case the pain gets worse or I need help getting up?"

"Aye," he said. "I'll just make a bed on the futon I saw in the front room." He moved to get off the bed, but Claire reached for his arm again.

"You can stay here with me. It will be more comfortable."

He swallowed slowly, "Aye," he said, as he carefully crawled in next to her. She was on the far side of the bed, next to the wall, so he took the spot beside her and curled on his right, facing her. "If this counts as our first date, it sure is a memorable one," he whispered before kissing the tip of her nose and closing his eyes.

***

Claire woke with an aching head, a warm bottle of vodka wedged under her back, and a stranger in her bed. She reached down and retrieved the bottle, tossed it gently to the end of the bed and then cautiously attempted to roll onto her back. She gritted her teeth and made a loud groan and decided it would be best to continue to face Jamie, as awkward as it felt.

She sighed and studied his face, his lips slightly smiling even as he slept. His brows were the same deep auburn of his hair, but his lashes seemed to start blonde at the root, growing into a dark, blood red at the tip. She had thought his nose to be completely straight, but upon closer examination, she noticed one small crooked part; evidence of a boyhood fight, she was sure.

Suddenly, one blue eye popped open. "Have I passed inspection, then?"

Claire pulled back, embarrassed. She closed her eyes and groaned, covering her head with her arm. When she peeked out, cautiously, Jamie was looking at her with a crooked smile. "It's alright, lass. Ye've no need to be embarrassed." He gently pulled her arm away from her face.

She gave him a wry smile. "Well, I suppose if you woke up with a giant in your bed, you might be curious too." She pulled herself up slightly so that her head was resting on her hand, supported by her elbow on the bed. "I do hope I didn't seem too forthcoming, asking you to stay."

Jamie sat up, resting his back against the headboard. "It's a good thing you did," he chuckled, "because by the time I had gotten your broken bum comfortably resting, I missed the last train back to campus."

She snorted at that, smiling, "So was this all part of your plan then? Break my arse so that you'd have a place to sleep."

"Ye've caught me red handed!" He threw his legs over the side of the bed, stood and headed to the bathroom, "And ye fell right into my evil plans."

Claire realized that the next humiliation in this situation would be coming up shortly, too. She was going to need help getting to the bathroom, and possibly with her underwear again, too. She closed her eyes again, briefly, hoping for sleep to take her. How on earth did she wind up here?

"I ken ye didna fall asleep again." She looked up and saw that Jamie had entered the room. He was unnervingly quiet in his movements for such a big man. "Now, I also ken ye'll have to use the necessary and yer probably no' looking forward to that, so come and let's get it over with."

With careful effort, he managed to get Claire out of the bed. He helped her in the bathroom quietly, leaving her as much dignity as possible. She limped into the kitchen, Jamie trailing behind her. "Do ye still think it's just a bruise, Sassenach? Or are ye ready to admit defeat and let me take ye for X-rays?" She attempted to ease herself down on the futon and Jamie caught her by the arm before disaster struck. "And do ye plan tae spend yer day standing?"

Claire sighed in resignation. "Fine, I'll go to the hospital. But you have to promise me one thing."

"Anything," Jamie replied, and he meant it.

"Promise me you'll buy me breakfast afterwards. I'm starving."

Jamie laughed and scooped her up in his arms, gently. "Ye have a deal. Now let's go get that lovely arse taken care of." Boldly, he planted a brief but earnest kiss on her lips and headed for the door.


	3. Breaking the Girl

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Jamie & Claire return from the emergency room, Jamie takes care of her, as the two continue to fall for each other.

Five hours after leaving the apartment to take her to the Emergency Room, Jamie returned with a very hungry, cranky, and mildly drugged Claire. She leaned on him heavily and he held her upright with his arm around her waist. His other hand held a doughnut cushion, a parting gift from the hospital.

He walked her over to the futon, placing the doughnut before gently lowering her down on it. "Is that all right, then?" She nodded sleepily. "OK, ye rest for a bit while I get some food together for you." Her eyes were already closing.

Before heading to the refrigerator, he reached for the phone sitting on a small table next to the futon. He dialed the number for his dorm room. After four rings, his roommate Rupert answered, "Hello?"

"Hey, it's Jamie."

"Where the hell have you been? I was ready to get a search party together!"

Jamie lowered his voice, so as not to disturb Claire, "I met a lass at the concert. I stayed at her place in the city."

"Oh ye met a lass?" Rupert teased in a terrible Scottish accent.

"Aye. I...dinna ken if I'll be back tonight. If my Da calls, tell him I'm at the library."

Rupert snorted. "Do you think he'll believe me?"

"Not a chance, but at least he won't think I'm dead in a ditch somewhere." Jamie glanced at Claire. Her head was leaning back on the cushion, mouth slightly open, and Jamie suppressed a chuckle.

"Well, if I'm going to be lying to your father, at least tell me that she's hot," the teasing continued.

"Aye, she's bonnie. Look, I've got to go. I'll see you tomorrow night at the latest."

"Make sure when you've got her in bed, you -" Jamie hung up the phone before Rupert could finish.

Shaking his head and chuckling he stepped into the tiny kitchen and opened the refrigerator. _Christ, no wonder she's so small,_ he thought. The entire contents consisted of a container with about an inch of milk in it, a stick of butter, a bottle of soy sauce, ketchup, and a half empty Chinese food container. Jamie opened this to inspect, and he made a face as he tossed it into the garbage. He walked back to the phone table and opened the drawer to retrieve a pen and paper. He hastily scribbled a note on it, placed it gently on her lap, retrieved the keys and left the apartment in search of groceries.

***

Claire woke slowly, confused at first as to where she was and how she got there. The apartment was silent, and she frowned. _I guess he's had quite enough of me,_ she thought. She stretched her arms and set them gently in her lap, feeling a small sheet of paper crumpling beneath her hands.

_C-_

_Went for some food. Try not to get hurt again before I get back. Maybe just stay put on the couch._

_-J_

She smiled at the note, the teasing tone and the intimacy with which he used only their initials. Could she really have just met this man less than 24 hours ago? She already felt like she had known him much longer.

He had been so gentle and patient with her at the hospital as she had shifted uncomfortably in the bed, cursing the staff at every opportunity, while they waited for hours to be seen. She got to know him as she listened to the stories he told of his childhood. Laughing, he described his roommates, Rupert and Angus; despite her discomfort, she found herself laughing with him at their misadventures. He held her hand while she was being examined, keeping his eyes locked with hers while he continued his stories to distract her. When they had discharged her with a doughnut pillow, some pills, and a diagnosis of a badly bruised tailbone, Jamie had gotten her settled comfortably in the cab before walking around the car to join her on the other side, sitting close to her and letting her rest her head on his strong shoulder.

The key clicked in the lock, disturbing her reverie. Jamie walked in with at least a dozen bags in his hands. He hoisted them onto the counter with a grunt and turned to smile at her.

"Are we expecting company?" Claire asked incredulously.

"I'll no' let you starve! Ye didna have enough food to feed a mouse." He started unpacking the groceries quickly, easily finding his way around.

"Keep this treatment up, and I just might have to keep you," Claire replied playfully.

Jamie glanced her way, smiling. She had a playful look in her eyes. "Aye, that was part of my plan, but I see I'll have to work harder to fool ye."

"Are you cooking something for me, or did you just plan to stock my shelves and leave?" Her tone was still light, but Jamie detected a hint of hopefulness as well.

"Och, I wouldna leave a lady helpless." He had put everything away except for a package of hamburgers, a box of pasta, a jar of sauce and a loaf of Italian bread. "I'll be cooking my finest dish for ye today. Spaghetti and sauce!"

Claire’s stomach grumbled. "Sounds marvelous."

Jamie walked over to her and planted a kiss on the top of her head. "A dish fit for a queen. Now let's put some music on. I cannae cook wi'out some tunes."

Claire pointed in the corner where a winding CD rack stood and yawned. She was still very tired from the pain medication. Jamie placed one hand on her cheek for a moment, a simple, caring gesture that warmed her through.

"Now comes the real test of whether or no' I stay. One bad choice on this rack and I'll be out the door," he teased. He squeezed between the chair and the futon to reach the CDs.

"Hmmmmm...Nirvana, REM, Prince…" he turned and raised one eyebrow at her, "Color Me Badd?"

She laughed and dismissed him with a flick of her wrist, "Guilty pleasure...go on."

He gave her a mocking look of disapproval and turned back, "Bon Jovi, Billy Joel...Christ, Sassenach, this isna getting any better." She made a twirling motion with her finger, indicating he should go on. "Ah! Chili Peppers, Tom Petty, Queen!"

"There's the one," Claire said with a triumphant smile. "Put on _Night at the Opera_ and then get cooking."

Jamie removed the disc from its case and carefully placed it into the slot on top of the stereo. "Ordering me around already?" She gave him an impish look, and he pressed play. The disc whirred for a moment and then Freddie Mercury's voice filled the room.

He walked past her on the way to the kitchen and Clair reached out and grabbed his hand, stopping him. "I don't know where you came from, but I'm glad you're here."

Jamie squeezed her hand and brought it to his mouth. "Aye. As am I." He kissed it gently. "Now, you rest some more while I get the food ready. It willna be more than twenty minutes or so."

Claire closed her eyes and listened to the sounds of cupboards opening and pots clanging. It had been a long time since she had felt so _cared for._ She had lost her parents at a young age; but, being raised by her eccentric uncle, had all her needs attended to. And Uncle Lamb did love her, in his own way, but this was different. Being with Jamie was like being wrapped in a cozy blanket in front of a warm hearth, safe from anything that could harm her. How could someone she hardly knew evoke such strong feelings? Her logical brain told her it was insanity, but her heart had ideas of its own.

She must have drifted off to sleep because the next thing she knew, she felt the futon shifting under Jamie's weight. She opened her eyes and looked to the side. He was a ridiculous sight in the low seat, knees bent up, a large plate in each hand. "Your dinner is served, madam."

Claire laughed softly and took one of the plates from him. "Wouldn't you be more comfortable at the table?"

"I didna want to move ye. You seem to be comfortable." He gave her a smile and began eating, comically balancing his plate on his knees. Claire chuckled and dug in as well.

***

By the time they finished eating, the light coming through the bow windows at the front of the apartment was fading. Jamie took care of the cleaning up and then turned to her, wiping the last of the dish water from his hands on his jeans.

Claire was beginning to feel uncomfortable again, her pain pill wearing off. She shifted a little, using her arms to brace herself and then sniffed, making a face. "Ew, I stink. Sorry about that."

"Dinna fash, I hadna noticed." He paused, considering. "Would you like to have a bath?"

"In fact I would, but I don't even know how I would get myself into that tub," she replied.

Jamie recalled the claw foot tub in the bathroom. Deep for soaking, with high sides. He cleared his throat. "I could help ye, if dinna think it immoral."

She smiled, suddenly feeling shy. "I don't. I wouldn't mind at all really." Her voice was quiet.

"Alright then, it's settled. Here, take one of your wee pills; I ken you're hurting again." He went to the sink and filled a glass with water. Handing it to her, along with the pill, he said, "Give me five minutes and I'll have it ready for ye."

He strode down the hallway, hands shaking a little. Knowing he was about to have her naked before him made his wame flip, and he had to take a deep breath to calm his nerves while he turned on the bath water. He checked the temperature and left the tub to fill, opening the cabinet above the sink. Sure enough, there was a small bottle of bath oils, and he brought it over the tub and dripped just a small amount in. Then, he leaned on the vanity, arms taut, looking in the mirror and willing his traitorous member to behave itself. He knew she was in too much pain for the kind of night the beast him in desired.

The tub filled to his satisfaction, he walked back to the living room to collect Claire. She was waiting, her ever present soft smile on her face, completely naked. "I thought I'd get myself ready."

Jamie stood, mouth agape, trying to keep his breath steady.

Claire giggled and crossed her arms over her chest. "Will you bloody well say something?"

He breathed out. "Christ, Claire. You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen."

She lowered her arms and chuckled softly. "Did you leave your glasses back at your dorm, then?"

He walked toward her, slowly, and took one of her hands in his. Placing the other on her cheek, he gave her a deep kiss, tongue searching her mouth, finding hers, twisting together. After a few moments he broke away, both breathing heavily. "I'll beg yer pardon," he whispered, his voice hoarse with desire, "I just couldn't resist ye, standing there so bonnie."

Claire responded by pulling him into another embrace. When he was finally able to pull himself away, he cleared his throat and swept her up in his arms again. Claire giggled, "I'm going to start getting used to traveling this way."

"If ye like, I will make sure you never have to walk anywhere again."

Her arms were around his neck, their faces nearly touching. "Whoever you are, James Fraser, I would like you to stick around."

He walked with her slowly, one eye ahead so as not to trip, the other locked in with hers. "I cannae believe we just met. I dinna think this is usual, this feeling between us."

They had reached the bathroom and he had begun to lower her to the tub. "No," she said, loosening her grip on him. "It isn't usual, but it's there, and I don't mind it a bit."

Jamie got her settled in the tub. He worried about her wee bum against the hard porcelain, but she seemed to be managing all right. "Would ye like me to give you some privacy?"

She reached up and touched his cheek with her hand. "You might just be the king of all men. I don't think I've ever known a man to be so concerned about _my_ needs and desires."

He squatted next to the tub. "My Da always tells me, 'Dinna ever try tae take from a woman what she isna willing to give.'"

"Well, I am willing. And I would be very grateful if you gave me a hand." She closed her eyes, waiting for him to serve her.

Jamie quickly grabbed a washcloth from the linen closet. He knelt at the side of the tub and squeezed out some flowery-scented body wash. "Let's get your back first. I ken it may hurt a little, so we'll get it over with."

Claire leaned forward, wincing. Jamie made slow circular motions starting at her neck and moving down. When he reached her lower back, she flinched. He placed one hand on her shoulder to steady her. "Relax," he said soothingly. "I willna hurt ye." She breathed deeply, releasing the tension of her shoulders, and he made quick, light work of it.

That part being done, he put more body wash onto the washcloth. He used one hand to gently tilt her head back, the other to rub the front of Claire's neck, tracing the delicate cords before moving lower. Her chest was rising and falling heavily, but he ignored that for a moment and focused on her lovely arms, one at a time.

Finally, in an achingly slow motion, he moved to her chest. Claire gasped as the rough texture of the washcloth grazed her nipples. He lingered there and she reached out with one hand to touch Jamie's face, "They must be filthy, with all the time you're spending there."

Jamie emitted a low grunt, moving to the right. "Aye. Better safe than sorry."

She moaned then and desperately tried not to wriggle and writhe. "Now sit still, lass. I dinna want to be wrangling ye like a toddler," he said in a mockingly stern tone, raising one eyebrow at her. He dipped the washcloth in the water and held it over her nipples, raised and taut. Slowly, he squeezed the excess water over them. She arched her back and winced as her tailbone hit the bottom of the tub. "I'm so sorry lass." Jamie pulled his hand back.

Claire grabbed it and pulled it back to her chest. "No. Don't stop. I'm just going to have to try not to wiggle too much. You aren't making it easy."

He conceded but moved on from her breasts, making slow circles as he moved his way down, making a trail down the lines of her waist and across her belly button. Her eyes were closed and she relaxed under him. He took his time, moving to her legs once he reached the end of her torso. She giggled and twitched her foot when he reached her toes, but as he moved further up her leg, around to her inner thigh and further up, her giggles turned to gasps. He slid his hand between her legs and rubbed her, slowly and gently. She started to move her hips and he placed his free hand on her stomach. "No, no lass. I'll no have you hurting yourself again." Her eyes were pleading but he stood his ground. "Can I wash yer hair for ye? Do ye have a pitcher?"

She nodded, "In the kitchen. You go grab it and I'll warm the water just a bit." Jamie turned the water on for her and left the room. Claire inhaled deeply, steadying her breath. He was back quickly, with a red plastic pitcher in his hands.

Jamie knelt down. Claire tilted her head back while he dipped the pitcher in the water, and then slowly poured the water over her hair. He repeated this several times before picking up the shampoo bottle. He gathered her hair and started massaging her scalp with his strong hands.

Lost in herself, Claire didn't even realize at first that his murmurings had a cadence. The language was foreign to her, lacking the familiar rhythms of one of the romance languages and she wondered which one it was until she caught a phrase she recognized, " _mo nieghan donn_."

"Is that Gaelic?" she asked, breaking his reverie. She pronounced it "gay-lik" and he chuckled.

"It's Gàidhlig," he replied, saying it slowly for her. "Ye ken the difference?"

"Isn't that what I said?" she asked, slightly indignant.

"No. The way ye're sayin it, is the Irish _Gaeilge_. I was speaking the Scottish _Gàidhlig._ Ye hear the difference now?" he asked gently.

"Hmmm, yes I suppose. I didn't even realize they were different languages."

He grunted. "Then I've a lot to teach ye." He had finished shampooing. "Tilt your head back, lass, so I can rinse ye and do the conditioner." She did as he asked.

"What was that you said? Mo nee-in down? You said that before, at the bar. What does it mean? she asked insistently.

" _Mo nighean donn_ , it means, 'my brown-haired lass.'" He finished the rinsing and moved on to the conditioner.

"You said it didn't translate before," she responded.

 _Christ. She doesn't miss a thing,_ he thought. "Aye well, ye'll just have tae wait for another time if ye want to ken what the rest of it meant. Now, we're almost done."

 _My brown-haired lass_ , Claire thought. So he thought of her as his lass already? She decided she was pleased with this idea and smiled contentedly while Jamie finished with her hair.

***

After the bath was complete, Jamie helped Claire dry off and then led her to her room. It was fully dark by then and Jamie turned the light on.

"Can you help me get dressed?" She was starting to get chilly.

"I'd like to keep ye as ye are for a bit longer, if ye dinna mind." His eyes were playful and eager.

"I don't think I'm up for...whatever it is your thinking of," she replied, disappointment clear in her voice.

He moved closer to her, putting one hand around her waist and kissing her softly. “I was thinkin of something that willna require too much movement on yer part. If you trust me and yer willing, I’d like to give it a go.”

She gulped and nodded. Her naked body was pressed against his, her pelvis pulled to his like a magnet. “I trust you,” she whispered.

It was all the invitation he needed. He wrapped his fingers in her hair and kissed her, a deep kiss, tongue caressing hers. They both inhaled sharply through their noses, and Claire’s knees felt weak. Jamie picked her up and placed her gently on the bed. He positioned her on her side and grabbed one of the pillows, wedging it behind her back, so she was propped gently. “Comfortable?” he asked.

She nodded and put both hands on the back of his head, pulling him in again, placing her lips on his and sucking gently. He moaned and she broke away, biting his lower lip. He continued his kisses, moving down to her neck, her nipples, her stomach. She moaned and her pelvis started gently rocking. Carefully, he took one of her legs and pulled it up slowly, placing it over his shoulder. She cried out as he buried his head in her, wasting no time in starting to lick around her lips, deftly avoiding the throbbing nub at the top in a teasing manner. She writhed, but thanks to Jamie’s careful planning, there was no pain. Just pure pleasure, pulsing through her entire body, bathing her in warmth.

Finally, he moved his attention to the bundle of nerves at the top, and she gave a loud “OH!” Never had she known a man so willing to give pleasure completely to her, without asking anything in return. She could tell by his enthusiasm that he was enjoying himself, rather than seeing this a chore that must be done.

He took one finger and put it inside her, his mouth still on her clit, licking, sucking, gently nibbling. He slipped another finger in and her body cried out to have him fill her completely. His speed increased, both that of his tongue and of his hand; finding a steady, quick rhythm that pushed her up a mountain of pleasure. He moved one more finger inside her and sucked that sensitive nub, and she made it over the peak, crying out. Her muscles convulsed against his fingers and her entire body twitched. He brought her down slowly, gently rubbing his fingers over her until the shuddering stopped. Then, he slowly disentangled himself from her legs and crawled up to the top of the bed to meet her face to face.

He slung his arm over her and kissed her. She was glowing with pleasure and contentment, and he smiled, happy to have been able to put that look upon her face.

***

As the night grew on, they settled back in on the futon. Jamie had been shocked to discover that Claire had never seen _The Shining_ so he had popped out to the video store to rent it. They cuddled together; Jamie smiled every time she snuggled into his chest at a scary part. He was completely under her power, and happy to be there.


	4. November Rain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jamie and Claire resume normal life after their exciting weekend, and celebrate Claire's birthday.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so excited to get this chapter up. It feels like it's been forever since I posted, but it really has only been a week. This chapter ended up being really long, so hopefully it is worth the wait. 
> 
> This story has grown from my original idea of a Jamie & Claire meet-cute at a Red Hot Chili Peppers, but music and 90s nostalgia will remain at the core of the backdrop. I will, however, be switching up my chapter titles to expand beyond Red Hot Chili Peppers songs into more songs contemporary to the story. 
> 
> Also, I have a mood board! Thank you so much to Serena (Charmingdearie on AO3 and twitter) who put this together and who I hope to continue to collaborate with. 
> 
> And very, very special thank you to my friend Erin (@alienoutlander on AO3 and twitter) who has been beta'ing this from the beginning and slogged through FIFTEEN PAGES this time get this chapter ready for show time. 
> 
> I have a special surprise chapter that will be a little bit different coming up this weekend and then the next full chapter should be ready early next week.
> 
> Hope you enjoy, and let me know what other 90s scenarios you would like to see this cute couple in!

The next morning, after ensuring Claire was fed and comfortable, Jamie headed back to Long Island. He was behind on his Arabic homework and had a paper due for French Lit on Monday. They had exchanged numbers and Jamie promised to call that night.

He arrived back at his dorm and headed straight for the shower. He had washed up some at Claire's apartment, but he hadn't changed his clothes since Friday night. As he walked into his room with a fresh t-shirt on and a towel around his waist, he noticed a note sitting on his dresser.

_Jamie-_

_Your dad called four times. I'm pretty sure he knows you're not at the library._

_-Angus_

Jamie sighed and picked up the phone, dialing the number he knew by heart. It rang several times before his Da picked up.

"Fraser residence."

"Da, it's Jamie."

"Well, finally returned from the library, have ye?" Brian Fraser’s voice was light and teasing.

Jamie cleared his throat. "Aye."

"What's her name?"

"Da…."

"Jamie…."

"It's Claire."

"Does Claire have a last name?"

"Beauchamp. We met at a concert. She's pre-med at NYU. It's her senior year, too. Anything else ye need to know? Her blood type mebbe?"

Brian laughed heartily at that, but when he spoke, his voice was serious. "Did ye use protection, Jamie?"

"Da! It wasna like that! Well, not exactly. Listen, I ken what I'm doing, all right?" Jamie replied, exasperation clear in his voice; he had heard the lecture a million times before.

"If ye get a lass wi' child, I'll no let ye shirk yer responsibilities," Brian said sternly.

"Da. I ken. Can we change the subject? What did ye need to talk to me about?" Jamie asked, steering his father to the original purpose of his call.

"Yer Uncle Colum invited us tae spend Thanksgiving wi' him. I cannae make it; John and I have business to attend tae the next day. Will ye go, though?"

Jamie sighed. He had already been entertaining ideas of spending that entire, long weekend in bed with Claire, but he knew he would never hear the end of it if he didn't go. "Aye, I'll go. Can I bring a guest, though?"

Brian scoffed, "Ye think it's a good idea to subject Miss Beauchamp to that so soon?"

Jamie paused to consider this. "Aye. If she'll go," he replied confidently. There was a sigh on the other end of the phone.

"Ye've got it bad for this one, eh Jamie, lad?"

"Aye, I do. Bye, Da."

"Bye, _mo mhac._ "

***

Jamie sat at his desk, trying to concentrate, but his mind kept drifting to Claire. He wondered what she was doing. _Was she getting around OK_? He glanced at his watch. _Had she eaten lunch_? He pictured her sitting on her wee futon, looking bonnie with her hair piled on top of her head. She had been wearing leggings and a tight, cropped t-shirt when he had left her, the bottom of the shirt barely grazing the top of her pants. He groaned and felt himself harden as he remembered her perfect ass in those leggings. _Oh Christ._ He wondered when Rupert and Angus would be home and considered locking the door, but decided against it, turning back to his paper on Madame Bovary.

He was just starting to make progress when his roommates burst in, smelling like a distillery. "Jamie! Finally decided to join us?" Rupert teased. He was a big lad with a beer gut and a jovial face covered by ill-kept facial hair.

"How's your _lassie_?" teased Angus. Lean and short, he was the perfect foil for Rupert. The two were rarely without one another.

"Christ, are ye two still drunk from last night or hae ye been drinkin already this mornin?" Jamie replied.

"You're one to judge, Romeo." Rupert retorted. "I didn't see you in church this morning!"

"Let's hope he at least spent part of the morning saying, 'Oh God!” Angus chimed in.

"Enough, dammit! I ken ye two are no’ going to get any work done today, but could ye please leave me alone so I can catch up on mine?" Jamie’s patience with them was wearing thin, and not just that morning. His roommates were both theater majors, and Jamie knew they had little homework to do at this point aside from memorizing their lines. They had been the three musketeers for the first three years of school, but when senior year came, Jamie had buckled down in order to ensure he graduated on time, while his roommates had mostly checked out.

"Fine, Mr. High and Mighty!" Angus shot back. "Will we see you at dinner?"

"Aye."

Satisfied, they stumbled out of the room, leaving an invisible cloud of ale and cigarette smoke in their wake.

***

Two hours later, he couldn't take it anymore. He picked up the phone and dialed. She answered on the fourth ring, sounding sleepy, "'Hello?"

"Claire, I'm sorry, did I wake ye?"

"Um, yes, I was napping but I needed to get up anyway. I have a quiz tomorrow I need to study for."

"I'll no’ keep ye long. I just wanted to hear your voice."

"It's good to hear your voice too, Jamie. Have you made any progress on your paper?"

"Aye, almost done. Then I've got tae spend a couple hours on Arabic before dinner. Did ye get yer lunch all right?"

She laughed softly. "Yes, thanks to your groceries."

"I should go, Claire, but…. can I call ye later? Tonight?”

"I'll look forward to it. Goodbye Jamie."

"Goodbye, Sassenach."

***

Claire sighed as she replaced the receiver. She snuggled back into her blanket, wanting to spend a few minutes wrapped in his voice before she got up to study. She started drifting off again when there was a loud knock on her door. Groaning, she threw the covers off and began the painful task of getting off the futon. _I'm replacing this thing as soon as possible_ , she thought.

Another knock. "Coming!" she grunted. She shuffled to the door and moved the curtain aside to see who was there.

It was her best friend, Gillian, standing in the Autumn chill in a mini skirt and a shirt that barely covered anything, topped by a long, white fake fur coat. Her blonde hair had been chopped to shoulder length and she wore a deep, red lipstick. She had been in her _Courtney Love_ phase since late September, which was a marked improvement from the _Wilson Phillips_ phase that had preceded it.

"Jesus, open the door, Claire! It's colder than a witch's tit out here!" Geillis shouted impatiently. Claire laughed and opened the door.

"Well hello, Miss Love, what can I do for you today?"

"Very funny," Gillian responded, brushing past Claire and heading right for the kitchen. She started rifling through the cupboards and refrigerator with a level of comfort reserved solely for best friends. "Christ, don't you have anything to drink?"

Claire rolled her eyes and walked to the living room, carefully settling herself back on the doughnut cushion, a new staple on her futon. "There's actually some vodka in the freezer, but I don't have anything to mix it with."

Gillian brushed this away with the flick of her delicate wrist. "No need for a mixer." She took down a glass and poured herself a generous amount. "Where the hell have you been? And what is that ridiculous thing you're sitting on. Do you have hemorrhoids?" She sipped her drink, made a contented "Ah," sound and moved to join her friend in the living room. She made herself comfortable on the bean bag chair.

Claire didn't speak for a moment, wondering how to explain everything that had happened in the last forty-eight hours. Best to start at the beginning, she supposed. "Well, at the concert, I found myself suddenly in the middle of a mosh pit."

Gillian almost spit out her drink. "And you broke your ass?"

Claire laughed, suddenly feeling grateful to have someone to share this with. Her head had been spinning since Jamie left and maybe her friend, crazy as she was, could help her sort through her feelings. "Just listen, please, without questions or judgment, and I'll tell you the whole story."

Gillian's face, normally animated and dramatic, went serious. "Alright, but let me pour a bit more of this first."

Claire began her story, holding nothing back. She told her of Jamie’s rescuing her at the concert, the unexpected electricity between them when they touched, their instant connection. She smiled as she recalled the way they had shared very personal stories at the bar and then that magical first kiss. Gillian laughed heartily as Claire recalled their sudden desperation for each other in Claire’s apartment followed immediately by Claire’s unfortunate mishap involving an unsteady table and her tailbone. And finally, she quietly told of the way Jamie took care of her and the intimacy they had shared. At last she said, “He’s only been gone a few hours, and I miss him already.”

Gillian threw back the final sip of her drink and sat up, leaning toward her friend. Giving her a knowing smile, she concluded for Claire, “You’ve got it bad. I haven’t seen you this way since you met Frank.”

Scrunching up her nose at the mention of her ex’s name, Claire shook her head, “Honestly, this is nothing like Frank. I mean, of course I was head over heels for him during the honeymoon phase, but this is something on another level. I never felt a connection like this with Frank, not even when we were at our best.” She paused, considering what she wanted to say next. “Do you think I’m crazy, Gigi?”

Gillian smiled and stood up to sit next to Claire. “No. Not at all. Sometimes you just meet the right person at the right time, and everything fits.”

“It feels like a movie. How can this be real life? There’s got to be something wrong with him!”

Gillian looked at Claire. “Listen, first of all, stop thinking like that. You haven’t had a man in your life in a long while, and I’m not going to let you ruin this.” She was pointing a finger at Claire in a mock-lecture gesture. “Second, I’ll see for myself. You’re going to invite him to your birthday celebration next weekend,” she declared, as if the matter was settled.

“My birthday! Shit! It completely went out of my mind!” Claire grimaced, her mouth a straight line with a slight downward turn at the corners. “I don’t know, Gigi. Isn’t it a little too soon for that?”

“It was probably a little too soon to have him spend the entire weekend with you at your apartment, hmmmm? But here we are,” Gillian replied with her head cocked to one side, her bright lips pursed, and eyebrows raised.

Claire laughed and returned her best friend’s cocked-headed body language. “You’re right. I’ll ask him tonight. Now, I’m sorry but you have to go. I have so much studying to do, and I want to have plenty of time to talk to Jamie tonight.”

Gillian stood and put her hands on her hips. “Maybe I don’t want this guy around you after all. You’re already replacing me with him.” Claire grabbed her best friend’s hand and looked up at her.

“Never.”

***

Studying complete and dinner eaten, Claire was snuggled in bed reading when the phone rang. She had brought the cordless phone with her into bed so she could cozy up in her blankets when he called. She answered on the first ring, not caring if she seemed too eager. “Hello?”

“Hi,” came Jamie’s voice from the other end of the line. His voice took her breath away as her heart rate picked up speed. He sounded slightly breathless as well. "What are ye up tae?"

Claire wrapped her comforter around her and settled in on her side, the phone against her free ear. "Just lying in bed, reading. You?"

"Aye. Lying in bed listening to music."

"What are you listening to?"

"U2." Claire was unable to stifle a derisive snort, surprising Jamie. "What, you don't like U2?" he asked incredulously.

Claire sighed. "No, I don't, and yes I realize I'm the only person on the planet who doesn't."

Laughing, Jamie replied, " I think yer probably right about that, Sassenach. But I like that ye have yer own mind."

They talked about their music tastes for a while, which matched for the most part. Claire observed that Jamie was a bit of a music snob. Before they knew it, an hour had gone by. Their conversation had grown quiet.

Jamie cleared his throat. "I was wondering if ye had any plans for Thanksgiving?"

Surprised, Claire stumbled over her words. "I, well...um, no. I don't really celebrate, and Uncle Lamb won't be back before New Year."

"My Uncle Colum lives on the Upper East side. He's hosting a dinner. I was...I was wondering if ye want to go wi' me," Jamie said, his voice picking up speed. "My Da canna go, so I sort of have to, and, well, I was hopin’ we would get tae spend time taegether that weekend. I dinna want to go but if I must…." His voice trailed off and he waited expectantly for her answer.

Claire was quiet, considering. This felt like a huge step and she wasn't sure if she was ready to take it so soon. But Gillian's voice echoed in her head and she determined that she would not ruin this. She was not going to go against her gut feeling for the sake of logical, orderly caution. 

"Claire, are ye there?"

"Yes, yes I'm here. And yes, I'll go, but now I have to ask you something."

"Aye?"

"My birthday is next week. Would you like to come to my celebration on Friday night?" she asked, her voice high pitched and hopeful.

"Hmmmmm…. what does this celebration entail?” Jamie asked cautiously.

"Just dinner and drinks with a few of my friends."

"And you want tae introduce me to yer friends already?"

Claire laughed, "You want to introduce me to your FAMILY!"

"Not my Da or anything! Just my Uncles and ye'll be there mostly for moral support." His voice shook with laughter too.

"Let's make a deal. You come to my birthday this weekend and I'll go to your Uncle's the week after. Sound good?”

"Ye've got yerself a deal!"

Claire composed herself and then, reluctantly, said "I've got to get some sleep, Jamie. Talk tomorrow?"

"Aye. When is yer first class? I'll call ye in the morning?"

"I have to be downtown by 8 am, so if you want to talk, it'll need to be just a quick chat around 6:30 or so," Claire answered, sure he wouldn't take her up on that offer.

"It's a date, Sassenach," he replied.

A smile broke out across Claire's face. "Talk to you tomorrow then….Good night, Jamie."

"Aye," he said softly. "Sleep well, _mo nighean donn."_

***

Throughout the week, they fell into a pattern of shorter phone calls in the morning before classes and longer calls in the evening. They spoke about their days, learning more about each other's classes and friends.

As the week wore on, Jamie's nerves heightened as he thought about meeting Claire’s friends. Then there was the matter of a present for her; it was nearly impossible to come up with the _perfect_ gift for someone he'd only just met but that he was sure he wanted to keep in his life.

He was running out of time on Thursday afternoon when the perfect idea came to him. He calculated the time that would be needed to put together the perfect mixtape for Claire, and ultimately skipped supper and cut his conversation with her short. He sat hunched at his desk, his stereo sitting in front of him, and painstakingly planned each song. Mixtapes were an art, and he knew he needed it to serve several purposes. He wanted to share his favorite music with her, pick songs that had special meaning to him or that exemplified his love for a certain genre or brand. But it also had to convey his feelings for her without going overboard. Had they been dating longer; he could have unabashedly filled it with cheesy love songs. Given their short time together - _were they even **together?**_ he wondered - the selections had to be carefully chosen; they must convey meaning to her if she was looking for it but be subtle enough for him to have deniability if she wasn't.

At midnight he collapsed in his bed, his legs curled up as usual so that his feet didn't hang off the end of the bed. Though he was exhausted, he tossed and turned, the sheets tangled around his legs until he kicked them off in frustration. All he could think of was seeing Claire the next day. He imagined her answering the door, looking bonnie with her curls hanging about her face, amber eyes twinkling and her gorgeous smile spreading across her face. He wanted to hold her, kiss her, take her to her bed and -

He groaned and turned to his side. Not wanting to make his insomnia even worse, he forced himself to recite his Arabic lessons over and over in his mind. Eventually, though, his thoughts drifted back to the next day, and he wondered about her friends. _What would they be like? Would they like him? What if he had nothing in common with them or Claire was a different person around them_. Frustrated, he threw his blankets off and sat up on the edge of his bed, head in his hands.

Just then, the phone rang, and he scrambled to reach it. "Hello?"

"Hi, it's me."

"Claire. Why are you calling so late? Is everything ok?"

"Yes, everything's fine." Her voice was low and sleepy. "I just couldn't sleep, and I thought…. I’m sorry if I woke you."

"No, I couldna sleep either."

"I can't wait to see you tomorrow."

Jamie's throat felt dry and he swallowed. "Aye. Aye, me too." He heard a quiet sigh on the other end of the phone.

"Good. I…. I just wanted to hear your voice one more time before I go to sleep," she said, her nervousness betrayed by the slight tremor in her voice.

"I'm glad ye called."

"Good night, Jamie. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Good night, Claire."

***

Claire raced home after her last class on Friday. She wanted at least an hour to get ready before Jamie arrived and she was cutting it close.

By the time she had showered and dressed, she had about ten minutes to try to tame her hair. Her hands were shaking, and the heat of the blow dryer combined with her anxiety caused a sweat to break out on her brow. Settling on a high ponytail out of frustration with trying to tame her locks, she stood in front of her full-length mirror to assess her work. She had chosen a short, cami-style, green tartan print dress that hugged her curves, over a long sleeve black t-shirt. Her black stockings came up to just above her knees and over those she had put on her black Doc Martens. With her wild curls pulled up, her long neck was bare, and she quickly added a choker to the ensemble. She had chosen subtle makeup with just a touch of lip gloss and enough mascara to accentuate her eyes. Satisfied, she grabbed her black leather mini backpack and turned off her bedroom light.

As if on cue, she heard a knock on her front door. Peering through the curtain to be sure it was Jamie, she opened the door and her breath caught in her throat. If it was possible, he looked even more gorgeous than she remembered. He wore a pair of dark wash jeans and an untucked blue flannel shirt that made his eyes pop. His mop of red curls had been combed neatly, though one stray bit hung in his eyes. He was holding a bouquet of flowers in one hand and a small gift-wrapped package in the other, a backpack slung over one shoulder. As soon as their eyes met, a lopsided grin erupted on his face. "Claire," he said, his voice quiet, as if he was talking to himself. Claire was speechless. "May I come in?" he asked, holding the flowers out to her.

Shaking herself out of her stupor, Claire took the flowers and stepped aside, gesturing for him to enter. "Yes, yes of course. Come in. Make yourself at home. I'll just put these in water." She turned toward the kitchen and then, remembering her manners, added, "Thank you. These are beautiful."

She busied herself in the kitchen, searching for a vase. Her hands shook and she tried to subtly take a few deep breaths. Jamie set his backpack down on the chair in the living area and walked over to the kitchen counter. Claire finally retrieved a vase and arranged the flowers in it. Having done all that she could to busy herself, she looked up at Jamie. He was still smiling at her; an eager, boyish grin on his face that melted her heart. "You look amazing," he finally said.

She felt color rising in her cheeks and he walked the few steps over to her and took her hands in his. He leaned down slightly and whispered, "May I?"

She nodded and lifted herself on her toes to meet his lips. It was a small, chaste kiss, and yet she felt that same kinetic energy from the week before flow through her. "I brought ye a wee gift. It's no’ much," he said, turning away briefly to grab the small package off the counter and place it in her hands. Smiling, she tore open the package. Seeing what it was, she turned the tape case over in her hands, reading the track list that Jamie had painstakingly written out the night before. "I wasna sure what tae get ye and I ken ye like music, so…" his voice trailed off.

"It's perfect, Jamie. Thank you." She stood on her tiptoes again and kissed his cheek, which quickly flushed a bright red, along with his neck and the tips of his ears.

***

They met Claire's friends at a small, intimate restaurant with an eclectic menu, that served everything from falafel to ribs. Jamie was unsure of where he should sit, but Claire pulled out a chair and patted the seat next to her, which earned a bit of a glower from her best friend, Gillian. Gigi, as he noticed Claire calling her, took the seat across from Claire instead, and spent much of the dinner sizing Jamie up. He felt her eyes on him the entire meal, and even when she was talking to someone else, he could just tell she had one ear listening to whatever conversation he was having. She was a force to be reckoned with.

Next to Gillian was Isobel, a somewhat plain but pleasant woman with dark hair and wide, round eyes. She was a Classics major and Jamie found himself instantly drawn to conversation with her, talking excitedly about their love of Greek and Latin literature. To Jamie's right was John, Isobel's fiancé. He was also likeable, if not a bit stiff and formal, a business major with a sharp sense of humor. His blonde hair was long and straight, pulled back in a neat ponytail. Rounding up the group, in a seat tacked on to the of the table was Mary, a homely girl, wearing frumpy clothes that made her look like a 40-year-old librarian. She had the unfortunate habit of stuttering when she was nervous, which, as far as Jamie could tell, was all the time.

After the group all had a round of drinks, Jamie relaxed and fell in easily with the group. He had let his guard down a little when Gillian, wielding her breadstick like a sword, pointed it at Jamie and asked him pointedly, "And what do you plan to do after you graduate, Mr. Modern Languages?"

Jamie choked, and while he took a drink of water, Claire clapped him on the back, throwing Gillian a look that clearly said, " _Cut it out!_ " Jamie noticed that her hand lingered on his back, rubbing in slow circles while he recovered. When he had regained his ability to speak, he said, "I dinna ken for sure yet, but I've a few things in mind. The military has a need for Arabic interpreters right now, so that's what I've been focused on."

It was Claire’s turn to choke. "The military?!?" she exclaimed, coughing. "Are you thinking of enlisting after graduation?"

The entire table had grown quiet and Jamie felt the heat rising to his face as all eyes were on him. "Dinna fash. I wouldn't enlist. There's more money and freedom in being a contractor. Besides, it's just one thing I've been considering," he replied. He flashed Claire a smile and her face relaxed, but Jamie could feel Gillian's eyes shooting daggers at him.

With the meal finished and the check sorted out, they left the restaurant and walked the few blocks to a bar that Claire had told Jamie was playing live music that night. As they walked, he slipped an arm around her shoulder and she reciprocated with her arm around his waist. Jamie relaxed again and realized that her touch seemed to take his nerves away, making him feel as if all was right in the world.

***

As soon as they had settled in at a table in the packed, smoky bar, Claire turned to Gillian and said, through gritted teeth, "Come to the bathroom with me."

Yanking her friend along by the arm, she pulled Gillian into the dingy lady's room. The walls were covered in graffiti and there was barely room for both of them to stand in front of the sink. "What the bloody hell is your problem, G? Why are you giving Jamie such a hard time?"

Gillian had turned to the mirror and started to reapply her bright red lipstick. She was dressed in a black dress that left no margin of error at the top or the hemline, covered with a long leopard skin fake fur. Once she was satisfied, she turned to Claire and said, "I'm just looking out for you. I don't want to see you hurt."

"I appreciate the gesture, but I can handle myself. Please, lay off," Claire said tersely.

Gillian sighed and put her hands on Claire’s shoulders. "I'm sorry, love," she replied, her voice softening. "It's just that this is your first love interest since Frank, and that was nearly two years ago now. And you know how it was when that ended. I'm just trying to protect you. "

Claire gave her friend a kiss on the cheek. "It's so sweet of you to worry about me, but I'll be fine. Jamie is _not_ Frank. Trust me. You just might like him if you stop trying to destroy him with dirty looks," she said, looking in her friend’s bright emerald eyes. "Please? Promise me." She held out her pinky and Gillian hooked hers around it.

"Pinky swear," Gillian replied, with a laugh.

They left the bathroom and headed back to their table, but Claire stopped in her tracks once she spotted Jamie. Standing next to him was a petite blonde wearing a dress that made Gillian's look like a nun's habit. The interloper was looking up at Jamie, laughing, with one hand resting on his arm in a friendly manner. _Too friendly,_ Claire thought. Just as she was about to jump to conclusions, Jamie caught her eye from across the room and a relieved smile spread across his face. He beckoned for her to come over. Gillian stopped her, "Who is that?" she asked.

"I don't know but I guess we'll find out," Claire replied as she walked toward them.

"Claire! There ye are," Jamie said, extracting his arm from the woman's grip and reaching it out to her. "Claire, this is Annalise. Annalise, Claire.” He paused and then said firmly, “My girlfriend."

Claire whipped her head around to look at Jamie, but he just smiled and gave her arm a squeeze. Claire put on her most polite smile and turned back to the woman. She was pleased to note that she had several inches on her. "Nice to meet you. Do you go to school with Jamie?" she asked.

The woman threw back her head and laughed. "No, no. Jamie and I are old friends," she said with a thick French accent. "We met when Jamie studied in Paris many years ago.

"Aye. Annalise and I were classmates," Jamie said, his voice tense.

"Oh, don't be shy Jamie! I wouldn't think a man who would get in a fist fight over me would think that we were just friends!" Annalise teased.

"A fist fight?" Claire said in surprise, looking from Jamie to Annalise and back again.

"It was nothing, Sassenach. Just dumb teenage stuff," Jamie replied, his face beat red. He was practically squirming with discomfort.

"Jamie is too modest. It was quite the scene! The gossip went on for days!"

Claire could feel her own temper rising as she watched Jamie squirm in embarrassment. “and what brings you to NY?” Claire asked.

“I’m studying abroad. I’ll be at F.I.T. for the year,” she answered, giving Jamie a knowing look.

Always there to help Claire out of any uncomfortable situation, Gillian seized the opportunity to distract Annalise. “F.I.T.! How interesting. I’m studying Film & Television at NYU, and costuming is one of my specialties,” she said, drawing Annalise into conversation.

As soon as Gillian had managed to move Annalise’s attention off Jamie, Claire spoke up. "You'll have to excuse us, Annalise. I need to speak to Jamie privately," she said, keep her voice steady and even. Grabbing Jamie’s hand, she pulled him toward the door into the refreshing, smoke-free air.

"I'm sorry, Claire," Jamie was saying before they were barely out the door. "I havena even seen her in years! It was noth -"

Claire turned to him and cut him off by pulling his face down to hers and kissing him. His mouth tasted like beer and ketchup, but also like him. Their tongues met and Jamie put his arms around her. When they finally broke apart, his face relaxed and he smiled at her. "That was not the response I was expecting," he said quietly.

Claire looked up at him, raising one eyebrow, and said teasingly, "Your girlfriend? Is that what I am?"

"I hope you dinna mind? I just had to make it clear to her that I’m no’ available. She's not the type of girl to take no for an answer," he replied.

Claire wrapped her arms around his neck. "Oh, so you didn't mean it?" she asked.

"Weel, I guess that depends on if ye minded," he said, smiling at her hopefully.

"I didn't mind," she said, and kissed him again.

They returned to the bar hand in hand. The band was starting to play, and Gillian grabbed Claire’s hand, "Let's dance!"

Claire looked at Jamie expectantly. "Sorry, Sassenach, but I dinna dance. Go have fun though. John and I will keep the table for ye." She gave his hand a squeeze and went off to dance with the girls.

Jamie sat at the table with John, angling himself so that he could see Claire. He watched as her hips moved, her lovely arse moving with them. He was so mesmerized watching her that he didn't even realize at first that John was talking to him.

"What's that? Sorry," Jamie said.

"I asked how long you and Claire have been dating."

"We only met last week, at the Chili Peppers concert," he replied, taking a sip of his drink.

"Ah yes! Isobel told me about that. Claire disappeared on them."

"Aye, she did," Jamie replied. He smiled as he took another sip of his drink. "I saved her from a mosh pit."

John laughed at that. "Claire does get herself into some interesting situations!"

"Well I'm glad she did that night. What about you and Isobel? How long have you been together?" Jamie asked.

"Since freshman year. We're getting married this summer," John said with a strange smile.

"Congratulations. It must be a good feeling to know ye’ve already found the one for ye," Jamie replied, smiling to himself and thinking about Claire.

John made what could only be described as a grimace and took a long gulp of his beer. "Yes," he said, his voice tense. "It will be good to be settled down."

After that, they fell into silence, sipping their drinks. Jamie watched Claire; John appeared to be watching the bottom of his beer cup.

Several songs later, Claire came back to the table. Jamie could tell by the goofy grin on her face that she was getting a little more than tipsy. As if confirming his suspicion, she sat down on his lap and put her arms around his neck, placing her forehead on his. "Are you having a good time?" she asked.

"Aye. And so are you, I see, birthday girl," Jamie replied. "Should we get you home while you're still able to walk?"

"I'm not drunk," she said, and then almost lost balance on his lap.

He grabbed her and held her firmly. "Oh really?"

"Well, maybe just a little. I wouldn't mind going home with you though," she whispered, giving him a quick kiss.

"Let’s say goodbye to your friends then, _mo nighean donn_ ," he said and brushed a stray curl away from her face.***

By the time they arrived at Claire’s apartment, she had sobered up a little. She had butterflies in her stomach, thinking about what was to come next. Jamie moved to sit down as soon as they walked in, but Claire stopped him. "Nope," she said. "You still owe me a birthday dance."

"Lass, I told ye I dinna dance," Jamie said, trying to give her a stern look.

Claire turned to the stereo and popped in a CD that was sitting beside it. "Come on now. It's my birthday and you have to do what I ask." She hit play and reached out for Jamie's arm.

The first piano chords of _November Rain_ filled the room, and Jamie allowed himself to be pulled into her arms. He held her around the waist with one arm and she draped one arm around his shoulder, their free hands clasped together. Claire lay her head on Jamie's chest and they swayed together in the dim apartment, falling in love.

_If we could take the time_

_To lay it on the line_

_I could rest my head_

_Just knowin' that you were mine_

_All mine_

_So if you want to love me_

_Then darlin' don't refrain_

_Or I'll just end up walkin'_

_In the cold November rain_


	5. Mix-Tape

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bonus Chapter - Jamie's Mix-Tape

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the response to my last chapter! I am so glad that everyone is having just as much fun as I am with this.
> 
> This "chapter" is just a peek at Jamie's mix-tape for Claire. Since Jamie's music snobbery is loosely based on my husband's, I asked him to collab with me to come up with the play list. You can see it here along with a little summary about why each song was chosen
> 
> I am about halfway through writing Chapter 6, so that should be up early next week.

[](https://ibb.co/k6XTyrY)

**Side 1: Past**

1\. Love of my Life-Queen

The lyrics are unabashedly sentimental, but the melody is delicately lovely.

2\. Velvet Green-Jethro Tull

A pastoral love song, with ebullient natural imagery evoking a less complicated era.

3\. Five Years-David Bowie

The spectre of mass annihilation is conjured to both unleash societal savagery and unexpected kindnesses, while reminding us to cherish our remaining time with those we love.

4\. Something-Beatles

A song of nascent love, in which the speaker, newly infatuated, believes he sees potential for life-defining romance. Plus George Harrison songs are awesome.

5\. Celebration of the Lizard by the Doors

An aural palimpsest of acid-addled lunacy and primal-painted visions in the Mojave desert. Sprawling, surreal, and satisfying.

6\. Battle of Evermore-Led Zeppelin

A call to arms for the peasantry to fight an evil of black sorcery, complete with sweet LOTR references.

**Side 2: Present**

1\. Black-Pearl Jam

An artist despairs when, abandoned by his love, his muse deserts him too, the colors of his work now “washed in black.”

2\. Porch-Pearl Jam

First overcome with caustic bitterness at his love’s wordless departure, the singer is soon filled with a soaring bewilderment as the enormity of his loss overwhelms him.

3\. Lithium-Nirvana

I could pretend Kurt Cobain’s lyrics are profound, but I’d rather just tell you that this song rocks.

4\. Under the Bridge-Red Hot Chili Peppers

Yeah, I’m sure you’ve heard this on the radio, but it’s really an elegant rock composition with an exquisite intro guitar riff.

5\. Knock Me Down-Red Hot Chili Peppers

So I bet you don’t know this one! Kiedis’s surprisingly poignant lament for his best friend and fellow band member Hillel Slovak. “It’s so lonely when you don’t even know yourself”-come on, that’s a great line.

6\. Rusty Cage-Soundgarden

Frantic, adrenalized rock about finally doing something about the shitty situation you’re stuck in. Plus the lead singer, Chris Cornell, belts out this number like he’s channeling Ian Gillan from Deep Purple.


	6. Scar Tissue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jamie reveals part of his past to Claire and they take a new step in their relationship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains some heavy material, including the death of children, so please proceed with caution.
> 
> Another important note I want to make is about the (lack of) condom use in this chapter. I gave it a lot of thought (probably way more than necessary) and ultimately decided that to be true to the setting, Jamie and Claire would not likely have used a condom if Claire was using another form of birth control. (Magic Johnson announced that he had HIV only a couple weeks before this chapter takes place, eventually changing the conversation about HIV, STDs, and condom usage.)
> 
> OK, that's enough of that!

[ ](https://ibb.co/LZnSZZc)

Jamie and Claire danced slowly together in her tiny living room. Claire's head rested on Jamie's chest and he gently rubbed her back with the hand that wrapped around her waist. She had never felt so comfortable with a person, let alone a man. Her body fit perfectly with his, as if they had been made for each other. 

As the song came to a close, she looked up and her eyes locked with his, deep blue and shaped a bit like a cat's. He smiled and bent down to kiss her. Their mouths met gently at first, but soon Claire felt the heat rising in her belly and she wrapped both arms around his neck, pulling him in to her. He responded, deepening the kiss and pulling her body in even closer. She could feel the hard evidence of his eagerness against her stomach and that was enough to send her desire over the edge. Jamie's hands began to roam and he was soon slipping the spaghetti straps of her dress down and then changing course and gathering her bottom in his large hands, kneading desperately. 

Claire’s fingers fumbled at the buttons of Jamie’s flannel, popping them open one by one until she could slip it off of his shoulders. The tshirt he was wearing underneath showed hints of his broad chest with very large pecs and, spurred on by her desire to see him, she grasped at the bottom of the tshirt, pulling it up.

Suddenly, Jamie broke their kiss and pushed Claire’s hands away, gently but firmly. "Claire, please stop," he said breathlessly, backing away from her.

Claire looked up at him, confusion plain on her face. "I'm sorry, Jamie. If you don't want to, if we're going too fast -"

Just as quickly as he had pushed her away, he grabbed her hand and pulled her back in, pressing her head to his chest, and slowly stroking her hair. He kissed the top of her head and spoke. "No, Claire. I want ye so much I can scarcely breathe, but there's something I need tae tell ye, before things go any further."

Claire looked up at him, her eyes darting back and forth, searching his face for answers. Finally she asked, "Is there someone else?"

Jamie's face relaxed into a smile. "No, Sassenach. There's no one else. It's just, well, there's a story I must tell ye, and I need to do it now. Can we go into your room? It's verra hard to get comfortable on that wee couch."

Claire nodded. She turned off the kitchen light and grabbed the mixtape Jamie had made on the way to her bedroom, with Jamie following. 

By the time she finished washing her face and changing into pajamas, Jamie was sitting up in the bed in his t-shirt and boxers. Claire gingerly crawled over him and settled in, taking his hand and resting her head on his shoulder. "Jamie," she said, "What's wrong?"

Jamie took a deep breath and squeezed her hand. "Do ye remember," he started, "that I told ye that my mother died when I was nine?"

"Yes, you said she died in a fire," she answered, curling into him, one arm wrapped around his chest. The pain was etched into his face and she wanted to wrap herself around him and take it all away.

"There's a lot more to the story," he continued. "My Da was away, so it was just my Ma and us kids. I told ye about my sister Jenny, but I also had two brothers, Willie and Robert. Willie was eleven at the time, and wee Robert was only two months old."

"Jamie, I'm so sorry," Claire said. She looked up at him and saw that tears were welling in his eyes. Sitting up, she pulled his head down to her, and he laid down, putting his head in her lap. She ran her fingers through his curls gently.

"The fire started near the back of the house," he went on. "It was the middle of the night and some of the smoke detectors must have been dead. I woke when I heard Jenny screaming. Our rooms were at the top of the stairs and, as soon as I kent what was happening, I got her out of her room. I sent her down the stairs and told her tae run like the devil to the neighbor's and call for help."

"I heard my Ma screaming but I couldna get to her. The fire had already spread to where her room was; I couldna even get close. Willie's room was across the hall from hers, and I never heard a sound out of him." He paused as a small sob escaped his lips. "I like to think that he never woke up, that he just drifted off in his sleep before he could feel any fear or pain."

"I could hear wee Robert cryin' though, and I was able tae get to his room. I pulled him out of his cradle and wrapped him in a blanket and then I ran for the stairs, but they were already engulfed in flames. The only thing I could do was run back into his room and try to keep the fire and smoke out as long as I could until the firetruck got there." 

"I stuffed some blankets under the door tae try and keep the smoke out and I grabbed a bright onesie out of his bureau and hung it out the window so that the firemen would see it. Then I just crouched in the far corner of the room and waited."

"Robert was wailing by then and I did my best tae comfort him, singing him songs and such. The smoke started to fill the room and I could hear the flames licking at the door, so I turned my back and tried to keep his wee body covered with mine."

Jamie stopped for a moment to wipe his eyes and went on. "Robert started coughing and I could feel him struggling tae breathe; he had stopped crying completely. The last thing I remember was the flames getting closer and the heat searing my back."

"I woke up in a hospital room a few days later with third degree burns covering most of my back. I was in the hospital for months. I had to have a lot of skin graft surgeries and I almost died of infection twice. They didna even tell me that all three of them - my ma, Willie and Robert- had all died. I didna find out for weeks," he ended, choking back sobs.

"Oh, Jamie," Claire said finally. She bent down and kissed the top of his curls. "I can't even imagine…"

Jamie sucked in a breath and lifted his head, pulling himself into a sitting position. He pulled Claire in close and rested his head on top of hers. "My back, Sassenach," he said hoarsely. "It's covered with scars from the burns and skin grafts. It's no' a pretty thing to see. That's why I needed tae tell you this before we….I didna want to scare ye, and I couldna bear it if you were disgusted by me." He said the last part so quietly it was barely a whisper. 

Claire sat up, extricating herself from his embrace. She took both of his hands in hers, kissing his knuckles before bringing them down to her lap. "Jamie, I could never be disgusted by you. I want to see _you._ "

"Claire, ye havena seen it."

"Take off your shirt," she replied. 

Jamie sat up in the bed, swinging his legs over the side. Shoulders slouched, his hands shook as he removed the shirt and set it on the bed beside him. Claire kneeled on the bed behind him and placed a finger on his back, and he trembled as she traced the complicated map of red keloid scars and the lines demarking the boundaries of each skin graft. Jamie's breathing was shallow and hilted, and she placed one palm flat on his back, bending down to kiss him between the shoulder blades. She reached both of her arms around him, threading them under his arms, and rested her head on him, cheek pressed against the scars.

"Yer not grossed out by them?" he asked tentatively.

"How could I be? They're a part of you."

He turned and faced her, his eyes red and puffy. "Thank ye Claire," he said, brushing a curl away from her face.

"For what?"

"For being you."

***

Worn out emotionally, they tacitly decided to go to sleep. Jamie lay on his back with Claire curled up next to him, using his chest as a pillow. Before he fell asleep, Jamie silently thanked the Lord for putting such a rare woman in his path.

He woke sometime in the night to find that they had changed positions at some point, both on their sides, spooning. His body had come to the realization that her plump buttocks were pressed against his pelvis before his brain did, and he groaned, shifting slightly. Claire let out a small, sleepy sound and wiggled against him. _Oh Christ_ , he thought. He wrapped his free arm around her waist and buried his face in the back of her neck. She made a "mmmmmmm" noise and moved her arse a bit more purposefully.

"Are ye awake, Claire?" Jamie whispered into her ear.

In response, she rolled over to face him, her hand reached out to cup his cheek. Jamie hooked his arm around her waist and pulled her in close. He ran his hand across her back and then slowly reached down further. "Ah," he said, "I've been wanting to get my hands on that sweet bum all night." 

Claire giggled and gently patted her hand on his cheek in a mock slap. "Well what have you been waiting for?" she asked, leaning in to kiss him. Her lips met his and he opened his mouth, their tongues meeting eagerly.

 _Oh God, she tastes so good_ , he thought. He held their kiss together as he rolled her over onto her back. She was wearing a tight tank-top and Jamie slowly reached his way under it, feeling her sharp intake of breath under his hand. Pulling his lips away, he smiled at her. "Is this ok?" he asked.

She nodded and put her arms around his neck, pulling him down again. "Yes," she said against his lips before crushing hers against them. He slipped his hand up higher and reached her breast. A moan escaped her lips as he cupped it in his hand and then gently brought his fingers to her nipple. 

Moving his hand lower, he pushed up at the bottom of her tank-top, pulling it up and over her head. "My God Claire, ye have the loveliest breasts." He brought his head down to her right nipple while stroking, kneading and tweaking the other, and he could feel her hips beginning to rock gently. 

She ran her fingers through his hair and over his back and then reached down to tug at his boxers. He helped her push them down and off, and she reached down greedily, cupping his balls and kneading them. Moaning, he pulled her shorts and panties down in one swift move and then reached down, finding her warm, slick center. He rubbed and stroked, taking pleasure in her moans and squeaks.

Her hips were moving more urgently against his hand and his balls ached with the need for her. "Claire," he panted, "do we need a condom?"

"No, I'm on the pill."

With a grunt, Jamie swung his leg over her, so that he was straddled above her. He kissed her eagerly and he could feel her sex bumping against his as she moaned. "Please Jamie," she pleaded. "I want you now." She opened her legs to him and he shifted positions so that he was aligned directly with his target. He hovered above her for just a moment, staring into her deep golden eyes. _Ah Dhia, I love this woman._

He pushed his hips forward and was inside her. A deep growl of satisfaction escaped from his throat as Claire grunted and began to move with him. Her hips were eager, but he slowed them, setting a steady pace so that he could savor this and make it last. This was the woman he'd been waiting for his whole life, and he planned to show her just how grateful he was for her. 

Claire picked up on his cues and wrapped her arms around his shoulders and back, moaning and squeaking. He kissed her as they moved together, each thrust sending sparks of electricity through his body that he had never felt before with any woman.

She began thrusting up against him harder, both hands on his buttocks, pushing him, seeking depth. He reached an arm around the back of her leg and pulled it in the air. Her response was instant and intense; her moans growing louder as he thrust hard and deep. She cried out, "Oh god, Jamie yes, yes, just like that." He could see her face tensing, feel the muscles in her stomach go taut. He knew she was close and so was he. Leaning into her, he set his forehead on hers and pushed as deep as he could. He could feel every muscle in her body contract just before she let go, letting out a hoarse, strangled scream. That was enough to send Jamie over the edge and he spilled himself in her, feeling the pulse of his cock as it slowed, crying out, "Oh God, oh Claire!"

He collapsed on top of her, still inside her, breathing heavily. Her eyes were closed but she ran her hands up and down his back. She looked so utterly and deeply relaxed, and he kissed her face all over - cheeks, lips, eyes, nose - before rolling off of her. 

She rolled over and snuggled close to him making a small "Mmmmmmm" sound. She kissed his chest before laying her head on it. "That was wonderful!"

Jamie squeezed her tight and replied, "Yes it was, _mo chridhe._ Verra good. Oh gawd I could just touch yer body all day and never tire of it." His hands were still roaming all over her body.

"I never - " Claire said, her voice trailing off.

"You never what, Sassenach?"

"Never mind," she replied sheepishly.

"Tell me!"

"Ok. I've never had an orgasm during...actual intercourse before. Only during foreplay and stuff."

"Oh, aye? Was it different?" His curiosity was piqued.

"Yes, it was….it was like it came from someplace deep inside; it took over my whole body."

Jamie's eyes started to blink as sleep washed over him. He kissed her again and whispered, "It felt different for me too, with you."

"Mmmmmm," she replied, drifting off in his arms. 

***

She woke to the smell of coffee, eggs, and bacon. Stretching luxuriously, Claire threw off the covers and padded into the kitchen. Jamie stood before her stove in his t-shirt and boxers, dodging bacon grease as he moved deftly around the small space. She had never seen a man so big move so gracefully, and she stood there, admiring this man, _her man._

He truly was the perfect specimen of a man and, as she watched his muscular arms flipping eggs and pouring coffee, she couldn't help but wonder when the other shoe was going to drop. Didn't it always? It had with Frank. She thought that perhaps she should guard her heart a little better than she had been, but when Jamie looked up and saw her standing there, meeting her eyes with his wide, goofy smile, she wasn’t sure if she would be capable of it even if she tried. She had fallen for him fully and completely, and if this was going to end with a broken heart, she would just have to deal with the consequences when they came.

"Good morning, Sassenach. I was going tae bring ye breakfast in bed," he said as she walked over and put her arms around him. 

"Smells delicious," she said, snatching a piece of bacon off a plate. Jamie bent down as if to kiss her and instead snatched the bacon out of her hand. She laughed and kissed his greasy lips. 

"Go sit down so I can finish up," he said, gently swatting her bottom with the spatula. She sat on futon with her legs hooked underneath her bottom. "Do ye take anything in yer coffee, Sassenach?"

"No. Black, please," she responded. He brought her over a steaming cup and she watched him over the brim of the mug as she blew on it and took a sip. "Do you work out?" she asked.

Jamie laughed. "No' really, why do you ask?" 

"I was just admiring your body and wondering what you do to look like that," she replied. 

"Are you checking out my arse, Miss Beauchamp?" he asked, shaking it playfully. "I'm no' a piece of meat." 

She laughed and said, "You're not answering the question!"

Jamie answered while putting the final touches on her breakfast plate. "I grew up on a farm, ye ken?" He brought the plate over and handed it to her, then took his own plate and started eating, leaning against the counter.

"This is very good," she replied, avoiding the topic of the farm after last night's revelations. "Thank you." She looked at him quizzically and asked, "Why are you eating at the counter?" 

"Because you dinna have a table and I can barely sit on that wee thing, let alone eat on it," he answered, pointing at the futon.

She laughed, remembering how he comically tried to balance his plate on his bent knees the weekend before. "I suppose I should do something about that. I'm perhaps a bit too old to not even have a proper table to sit at."

"Ye could get some stools for this counter," he replied thoughtfully. 

"Hmmmmm…" she said, considering her options. Then, changing the subject, she asked, "Do you have any plans for today?"

Jamie was already finishing the last bite of his food and he reached for more toast and bacon. "No," he answered. "I didna know if ye had any other birthday plans or if ye would want to hang out with me more or…." He shrugged, giving her a hopeful look that made her heart skip a beat.

"No, I don't have any other plans. I do have to study today, but if you don't mind hanging around while I do that, maybe we could order in and rent another movie tonight?" she replied, taking a sip of her coffee. 

He gave her a devilish grin and said, "I brought my own books fer studying, just in case."

Claire took another sip of her coffee and then stood. She walked over to Jamie and set her dishes on the counter before putting her arms around him. "Let's go back to bed for a bit first," she said.

"Ye read my mind, Sassenach."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, the mood board was made by Serena (Charmingdearie on AO3 and twitter). Thank you so much!
> 
> And as always, thank you to Erin (@alienoutlander on AO3 and twitter) for being my ever-faithful beta!


	7. Who Wants to Live Forever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Triggered by the death of Freddie Mercury, Jamie & Claire share memories of their parents.

_November 25, 1991_

_5 AM_

Someone was ringing the doorbell, which was odd because they didn't have a doorbell. Jamie groaned and rolled over in his narrow bed and, ignoring the insistent noise, drifted back to sleep. 

Moments later he was being smashed in the face with a pillow. "Answer the damn phone, Jamie. Only a girlfriend would call at this hour and you're the only one who has one of those," Rupert roared from the top bunk.

Jamie blinked into wakefulness and grappled for the phone he kept by his bed. "Answer it, dammit!" Angus yelled from his bed. 

Jamie's hand finally grasped the receiver, fumbling a bit in the process. "Hello?" He heard nothing but sniffling sounds on the other end. "Hello? Claire? Are ye alright?"

"Jamie," she squeaked out. 

"Christ, Claire, what's wrong?"

More sniffles and then, finally, "Freddie Mercury died."

Jamie rubbed his hand over his face and took a deep breath. "That's terrible news, Sassenach. I'm sorry. I dinna ken what to say."

"I know," she gulped, "it's silly to be making such a fuss about it. It's not like I knew the man." Her voice was faltering, and she took quick, sobbing breaths every few words. "It's just that, one of my last memories of my father was buying _Queen II_ with him and listening to it on his record player."

"I'm so sorry, _mo chridhe._ " Jamie said quietly.

"When I moved in with my Uncle Lamb, he would make sure to get his hands on every record they released as soon as we could. I think it was his way of keeping that memory alive for me," she told him, her voice starting to sound more steady.

"My Ma used tae play _Night at the Opera_ and get us all singing along wi' her," Jamie replied. "Do ye remember ye picked that album for us to listen to that first day we spent together? I kent then she would approve of ye."

"Thank you for understanding, Jamie. I didn't mean to wake you."

"It's alright, lass. That's what I'm here for."

"I'll let you go now. Talk to you tonight?" she asked, knowing what the answer would be.

"Aye, of course. And I'll see ye Wednesday," Jamie replied, feeling cheered at the thought.

He could practically hear her smiling through the phone, too. "I can't wait. Goodbye, Jamie."

"Goodbye, Claire."

The words _I love you_ lingered in the air, still unspoken.

_Each morning I get up I die a little_

_Can barely stand on my feet_

_Take a look in the mirror and cry_

_Lord, what you're doing to me_

_I have spent all my years in believing you_

_But I just can't get no relief, Lord!_

_Somebody (somebody) ooh somebody (somebody)_

_Can anybody find me somebody to love?_

In Memory of Freddie Mercury

September 5, 1946 - November 24, 1991

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would be remiss if I let the death of Freddie Mercury go unmentioned, given the timing, but it didn't feel right to have this as part of a larger chapter.


	8. Money

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jamie and Claire spend Thanksgiving with his Uncle Colum's family.

[ ](https://ibb.co/Kj144hQ)

_November 27, 1991_

Claire sat on her bed, surrounded by the entire contents of her closet. Gillian dug through the piles, occasionally picking up one item or another and holding it out in front of her before she discarded it back into a pile.

"It's hopeless, Gigi. I don't have one single item of clothing that I can wear to a _formal_ Thanksgiving dinner." She groaned and laid back, covering her face with her hands.

"Stop! We'll find something." Gillian responded, rummaging through the clothes again, finally settling on something and holding it up. "Here, this will work!" she exclaimed.

Claire sat up and gaped at the dress her best friend was holding up. "That is way too short for getting to know his family!" she said in a scandalized voice.

"Just try it on!" Gillian commanded, throwing the dress at Claire.

"Fine," Claire huffed as she quickly changed out of her normal jeans and t-shirt and slid the dress over her head.

The dress was a deep burgundy with just a hint of iridescence. It fit snugly in the torso, with five spaghetti straps splayed across each of her shoulders. The dress flounced out at the skirt, which barely reached her mid-thigh. "I look like an ice skater!" she declares. "G, I can't possibly wear this."

"Yes, you can. Look, you'll wear these opaque tights with it, your knee-high boots, and here," she said, grabbing another item from the pile, "wrap up this scarf like so,” She grabbed a hair tie from Claire's dresser, "Hair up like this, and BAM, you're a knockout."

Claire twisted and turned in front of the full-length mirror that hung over her bedroom door. She did look quite good, but she thought she should wear something a bit more modest.

"I can tell by your face that you're second guessing me," Gillian said, rolling her eyes. "Why don't you keep it on and ask Jamie when he gets here."

Claire stared absent-mindedly, "Mmm...I suppose."

"When is Mr. Gingersnap getting here anyway?"

"Gillian!" Claire admonished, laughing.

"What? I could have called him Mr. Gingernut." she retorted, shrugging and laughing.

As if on cue, there was a knock on the door. Gillian ran to open it, leaving Claire laughing in the bedroom. She opened the door and greeted Jamie, "Well, El Gingero is finally gracing us with his presence!"

"Good to see you too, Gillian," Jamie scoffed playfully. They had spent some more time together since their first meeting and were now very fond of each other from what Claire could tell.

"Put your stuff down, Red. We need your opinion on something." She helped him with the garment bag he was carrying as he threw his duffel bag on the futon. "Claire! Come out here so he can see your dress," she yelled toward the bedroom. Then, to Jamie, she said, "We're picking out her dress for the big soiree on Thursday. Miss Prissy Pants thinks it's too risqué."

Claire entered the room then, and Jamie's jaw dropped. "Sassenach, ye look beautiful," he said, moving toward her to embrace her. He smelled her hair as they hugged and he whispered, "I missed ye," in her ear before pulling away, leaving one arm casually draped around her waist.

"You don't think it's too short?" she asked nervously.

"No, my family's no' prudish. It's perfect."

"All right then," Claire relented. "I'm going to go change now, though."

She turned to go back to the bedroom, but Jamie pulled her in closer and whispered in her ear, "Maybe you can wear it again for me later tonight." She playfully slapped his arm and headed toward the bedroom.

"So," Gillian said, "this Thanksgiving dinner sounds like quite the event."

Jamie rolled his eyes. "Aye. My Uncle is no' one for doing things modestly."

"Does Claire know what she's getting herself into?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Dinna fash," he said with a wave of his hand, "she'll be fine."

Claire rejoined them, dressed in a short plaid skirt and t-shirt. "Are we ready to go?" she asked, putting her arms around Jamie's waist.

It was Gillian's turn to roll her eyes. "I can't believe I'm going to be the third wheel with you two. You can't even keep your hands off each other for a second. Let's get going then. We'll miss the previews."

"What are we going to see anyway?" Jamie asked.

“ _My Girl_!” Claire said excitedly.

Jamie sighed, resigned, and escorted his two dates out the door.

***

"Why is your Uncle sending a town car?" Claire called to Jamie from her bedroom while he shaved in the bathroom. It was the next morning and they both busied themselves with getting ready.

"I dinna ken. Probably so he's sure I'll actually show up!" he called back.

"Isn't that a little extravagant, though?" Claire asked as Jamie emerged from the bathroom freshly shaved, wearing nothing but a small towel around his waist.

"For my Uncle? No. He owns two," Jamie replied casually. "Christ you look good in that wee dress." He pulled her close and nibbled at her ear.

"And you look good in that towel," she replied, ducking away from him. "But if you try to take this dress off of me now, we'll end up late. Get dressed, please." She gave him a small smack on the bottom as she walked out of the room.

She fussed around the living room, straightening things up. She found her bra from the night before behind the futon and the shirt she had been wearing flung halfway across the room. She smiled, flushing a little at the memories and stacked the two stools she had purchased the weekend before.

Jamie emerged from the bedroom then, in a grey suit. He wore a blue shirt, her favorite color on him, with a tie of darker blue draped neatly over it. His hair was neatly combed back and Claire resisted the urge to run her fingers through it, to tousle it back into its normal messiness. "You clean up very nicely, Mr. Fraser," Claire said, teasing him.

"As do you, Miss Beauchamp" he replied, grabbing her arm and pulling her in. He bent to kiss her, and she brought a finger up to his lips.

"Easy there. I spent a good while getting this lipstick right," she teased.

Just then, there was a knock at the door. Claire could see Jamie’s shoulders tense. "That'll be the car then." His voice was resigned and strained. He pulled her in for a quick hug before they headed out the door.

Stepping outside, Claire stopped in her tracks. “Jamie! This is practically a limo!”

Jamie sighed again, “Aye, let’s go, _mo nighean donn_.” He took her by the arm, and they walked down her steps and got into the car together.

They slid across the leather seats and Claire saw that there was a bucket of champagne and two glasses waiting for them. “Are you sure this is from your Uncle?” she asked. “This isn’t some romantic surprise you planned for me?”

“No, this is typical Uncle Colum. He’s always overly flashy,” Jamie said, rolling his eyes. “But when in Rome…” He shrugged and popped the cork on the bottle, pouring the bubbly liquid into the two glasses. “To first holidays,” he said, clinking Claire’s glass with his.

Claire smiled at him, trying to find the right words. Their relationship was so new, and yet, she couldn’t shake the feeling that they were embarking on a long journey together. She knew deep down that she wanted to be with him for a very long time, perhaps forever. It could be shrugged off as the infatuation of puppy-love, but she had felt that before, and this was different. From almost the instant she’d met him, she had a feeling of rightness, as if she had been waiting for him her entire life. He fit into her life like a key into a lock.

Boldly Claire said, “To finding the right person.” They clinked glasses; eyes locked together as they sipped.

Jamie, emboldened by his champagne breakfast and Claire’s toast, moved up close to her and put his hand on her inner thigh.

"Jamie!" Claire squeaked. "It's only going to take 10 minutes to get there."

He slid his hand up further and leaned in to kiss her neck, "That's plenty of time," he growled before biting her neck, then reached around her and pulled her into his lap. She could feel his erection and she rocked her hips forward, teasing him and creating friction in just the right spot. Jamie moaned and buried his face in her neck while she rocked against him. "Please, Claire," he begged.

"What do you want?" she whispered, panting.

"Ye ken what I want." Beads of sweat broke out on his forehead as he grabbed hold of her ass.

"I want to hear you say it," she teased, leaning in to lick his ear.

He groaned and his hands pushed her forward. "I want ye to ride me, right here in this car," he said through gritted teeth.

"That's a good lad," she replied. Her hands moved to quickly unzip his fly. She pushed his pants down just enough to free his erection, pushed her tights down and panties to the side, and in one graceful move was on top of him.

She moved on him quickly and he thrust his pelvis in time with her rhythm. Their foreheads pressed together, they moved as one, panting and moaning. Jamie reached around and took hold of her ass, increasing the friction she needed. She let out a strangled cry and pushed harder, the tension rising in her muscles. "I'm so close, Claire," Jamie breathed out. "Come with me, Claire." He reached his hand further, spreading her cheeks wide, and gently prodded her with one finger. She squealed and he wiggled the finger inside her, pushing her over the edge. She fell apart around him and as she contracted against his hardness, he let go, both of them moaning into each other’s mouths.

Slowly he moved his hands up to her back while she panted on top of him. Despite her earlier warning, he kissed her long and deep before she rolled off him.

The car came to a stop and Claire sat up, straightening her dress and patting down her wild curls. Jamie zipped his fly and smoothed his shirt. The driver opened the door, and they stepped out onto Fifth Avenue. Claire gasped as she took in the giant building before her. It was the tallest building on the block, all stone and floor to ceiling windows on each floor. At the entrance was a long awning that read _MacKenzie_ on the front. “Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ, Jamie. Is your uncle Colum _MacKenzie?_ ” she asked incredulously.

“Aye,” Jamie replied, following her gaze up to the top of the building. “Ye ken who he is?”

“Do I _ken_ who he is?” she answered, the sarcasm dripping in her voice. “Of course, I do! Everybody in Manhattan, if not the entire country, knows who he is!”

Colum MacKenzie was America’s greatest success story, if you believed the media hype. “ _A disabled immigrant who came to America at age 18 with nothing but $20 in his pocket and a dream in his heart_ ,” all the articles said about him. To hear the talk, he owned half of Manhattan and would soon be expanding. He also had a somewhat less talked-about reputation as a womanizer and, if one were to believe the rumors, a man with very few scruples about the way he did business. Claire stood on the street shaking her head, unable to reconcile the idea that _her_ Jamie was related to this man. “Why didn’t you tell me?” she finally asked.

Jamie shrugged. “I’m sorry, lass. I didna want to scare ye away.”

Claire turned to him, her face was pink with either anger or the cool air, or perhaps both. Her arms were crossed in front of her chest, chin high in the air. “Listen to me Jamie. If this relationship is going to work, you need to be honest with me. We’re still getting to know one another, so there will be things that we both need to learn about each other. But I cannot have you deliberately withholding information from me. That is the same thing as lying in my book. I’ve already been with a liar; I won’t do it again.”

Jamie stepped forward and placed his hands on her shoulders. “Yer right, and I’m sorry. I just didna want to say anything when I first asked ye because I didna want you to think I was bragging. And then, it just never felt like I had a good opportunity to slip it into the conversation. I’m sorry, Claire. Forgive me?”

Her face softened and her shoulders relaxed. She reached out one hand to place it on his cheek, and answered, “Forgiven.” He leaned down and gave her a soft kiss before putting his arm around her and leading her into the building.

The lobby was breathtaking. Chandeliers hung from the high ceilings; gold fixtures lined the walls. The floors were marble, and every step of her heels echoed. They approached the reception desk and Jamie spoke to the man there. "James Fraser here for Mr. MacKenzie," Jamie told the man behind the desk. After a brief call, the man gestured toward the elevator bank.

"Elevator five, Mr Fraser. It will take you directly up."

Jamie nodded and they walked together to the elevators. As if by magic, the doors opened as they approached, and they stepped on. They leaned against each other as they made their slow ascent. "Are we going all the way to the top?" Claire asked.

"Aye. Penthouse," Jamie answered shortly. She could see the tension rising by the hard set of his jaw. The fingers of his right hand drummed nervously against his leg.

At last the elevator doors opened directly into the apartment. _Well, if that isn't just the height of opulence,_ Claire thought. They were greeted by a butler who took both their coats and handed them each a glass of wine before escorting them into a spacious sitting room, filled with white leather furniture and lines with floor to ceiling glass. His family was sprawled about on various pieces of furniture; a general buzz of chit-chat filled the room but ceased when the butler announced their arrival. Jamie pressed his hand into the small of her back and she gave him a quick glance of reassurance. They were raised slightly above the small sitting area, a set of stairs and a small, low glass partition separating them.

"Well, if it isn't my nephew and his lovely companion," Colum declared as he slowly rose to meet them.

"Uncle Colum, dinna get up on our account," Jamie said dismissively, leading them toward him.

"Nonsense!" his uncle exclaimed, getting his hands in his crutches and walking over to them. "I'm no' so crippled that I canna stand to greet such a beautiful young lady." He had reached Claire by then and leaned in to kiss her cheek in greeting. Claire was surprised to hear the thick Scots in his voice; any time she had seen him interviewed on television he spoke in a Scottish accent, but a muted one, with no interlacing Scots words.

"Very nice to meet you Mr. MacKenzie," Claire said, reciprocating the polite kiss. "Thank you so much for having me."

"Ye'll call me Colum," he said, then turned to Jamie. "I'm just sae pleased my nephew is actually gracing my doorstep. He lives so close and yet canna make any time for his auld uncle, it seems." He played it off as joking, but Claire could hear an edge in his voice.

Jamie greeted him and made small talk while Claire looked around the room, observing each of the guests. Her eyes fell on a tall woman with perfectly coiffed copper hair, dressed in an elegant gown, and her face looking as if it had been done up by a professional. This must surely be Colum's wife. Claire searched her mind for her name but came up short. Next to her feet on the floor, absorbed in his Gameboy, was a boy of about ten with hair the color of Jamie’s and the same messy, tousled look that could not be tamed. Across from them in a chair, Claire could see the back of the head of a tall, balding man, his shoulders set straight on top of a ramrod posture. To his right sat a blonde girl, probably around seventeen or eighteen by Claire's guess. She sat slightly slouched in a dress that accentuated her curvy figure, lips pouting.

Jamie nudged Claire and they walked down a set of three marble steps into the sitting area. Jamie made the introductions. As Claire suspected, the redheaded woman was Jamie's Aunt Letitia. The young boy was his cousin Hamish. The tall balding man was his Uncle Dougal, in full military dress. He stood to greet Claire and eyed her with just the slightest leer that made Claire’s skin crawl as she instinctively pulled herself closer to Jamie. Finally, Jamie's eyes rested on the blonde girl who now sat up expectantly, her eyes wide as she looked at Jamie. "I'm sorry lass," he said finally. "Ye look familiar but I dinna remember your name."

Her face drooped and Leticia swooped in smoothly, "Why this is Laoghaire, my niece. She was probably no’ but a wee bairn the last time ye laid eyes on her, but look at her now, all grown up!'

A flash of recognition went across Jamie's face. "Oh, aye! The last time I saw ye, you were just a wee thing of maybe nine or ten, but I ken ye. It's good to see ye, Laoghaire. This is my girlfriend, Claire Beauchamp."

Laoghaire frowned but remembered her manners. "Pleased tae meet ye, Miss Beauchamp," she said tersely.

"Please, call me Claire," she replied looking first at Laoghaire, then around the room. "It's so nice to meet everybody. Thank you all so much for having me."

Colum had moved back to the couch near his wife but was still standing. "This calls for a toast!" he declared and made a slight gesture to one of the staff, who immediately rushed off, returning in moments as if this whole scene had been planned and rehearsed. The champagne was quickly passed around. Colum raised his glass and they all followed suit. "To family," he declared, "and loyalty. To sticking together always, no matter the cost." Claire raised an eyebrow to Jamie, and he shrugged as they raised their glasses. Claire said "Cheers," and was embarrassed when the rest of the room declared, " _Slàinte mhath_.” She looked at Jamie sheepishly and shrugged her shoulders; he gave her back a reassuring pat and led her to a loveseat. He sat close to her and put his arm around her, whether for possession or protection she wasn't quite sure.

They made small talk, asking and answering the obligatory getting-to-know-you questions. Dougal was apparently high ranking in the army, a career military man. Letitia "ran" a few of the MacKenzie charity organizations but Claire suspected that her involvement was something along the lines of showing up at events and rubbing elbows with those who were apt to write the biggest checks.

Laoghaire was mostly silent, as sullen teens were wont to be, but Claire noticed that her gaze was fixed on Jamie more often than not. It made Claire uncomfortable, and she slipped her arm through Jamie's, leaning her head on his shoulder. Deep in discussion with his Uncle Colum, he sensed her presence and moved his head to glance at her, giving her a quick kiss on the top of her head. Laoghaire sat back in the chair and crossed her arms on her chest.

Claire was thankful for Jamie's arm around her. He would absent-mindedly rub her shoulder now and again, as if it were the most natural thing in the world for the two of them to be sitting here together, as if he had sat this same way with her a hundred times before. Her nerves settled and she joined in the chit-chat.

Sometime later, one of the staff came in and whispered in Leticia's ear. She stood and clapped her hand to get everyone's attention. "Dinner is ready!" she announced. Everyone, please make your way to the dining room.”

Claire stood, smoothing her dress. "Jamie," she whispered. "Where's the bathroom?"

Jamie pointed her in the direction of the bathroom and made sure she knew how to get to the dining room after. She found her way there without incident, but on the way back, turning a corner, she ran smack into Dougal. "Oh, I'm sorry lass," he said, placing his hands on her shoulders. "Are ye alright?" She nodded and tried to pull away, but his fingers gripped on her shoulders. She suddenly realized that she was trapped in this hallway and panic seized in her throat. He must have felt the tension rise in her shoulders because he loosened his grip a bit. "Sorry lass, I didna mean to scare ye. I was just trying to make sure yer alright," he said leering down the front of her dress.

Claire shrugged his hands off her shoulders. "I'm quite alright. Now if you'll excuse me." He stepped aside and she brushed past him and moved quickly to the dining room, her only thought was to get back to Jamie.

The dining room held a long table with the most intricate table setting Claire had ever seen, except on television. Beautiful centerpieces were surrounded by enough food to feed four times as many people as were present. Jamie was seated to the left of Colum, and he signaled to Claire to take the seat next to him. On her other side was Laoghaire; she sat down and squeezed Jamie's hand under the table then turned to the girl to make conversation while the food was served. "So, Laoghaire, do you live in New York?"

"Och, no!" she said. "I live in Scotland, but I'm visiting because I'm thinking of coming here for University next year. Did I hear ye say ye go to NYU?"

"Yes, it may be my last year, though. Next year I'll be going to medical school, and I haven't found out where I've gotten in yet," she responded. "I'm hoping it will be NYU, but I've applied all over the country."

Laoghaire gave her a surprised look. "What does Jamie think of that?" she said, a little more loudly than necessary.

"What's that?" he asked, turning his attention to them.

"I was wondering what ye thought of Claire going to medical school across the country," she said primly.

Jamie gave Claire a quizzical look. She shook her head and began to say, "I didn't say - " but was interrupted by Colum clinking his glass with his knife.

"Before we begin, I hope you'll indulge me in saying a few words. I'd like to thank my beautiful wife, who prepared this beautiful meal for us." Claire stifled a snort and Jamie pressed down on her foot with his under the table. "I'm thankful for the family around this table today, and our new friend, the lovely Miss Beauchamp." Jamie gave Claire’s hand a quick squeeze. "And for my nephew Jamie, who will be joining me in the family business when he graduates this May." Claire kicked Jamie's foot which was still on top of hers, startling him into spilling some of his drink.

"Sorry, sorry, clumsy!" he said, embarrassed.

"Och, nae bother, lad," Colum said dismissively to Jamie and then, to the rest of the family: "Let's eat!"

Dougal had joined the table at Colum's right hand before his speech. He took a sip of his wine and looked from Jamie to Colum. "So, it's settled then, lad? I wish ye'd talked to me before making a decision," he said with an edge to his voice.

Jamie opened his mouth to speak but was cut off by Colum. "Just some technicalities to iron out," he said with a nod.

"I thought ye were still thinking of enlisting, Jamie. I've been workin’ on getting you a connection with the translation units," Dougal said.

Colum again interrupted, and Jamie sat back, resigned to watch as his uncles argued over his fate. By the look on his face, Claire could tell this was not the first time this argument had played out. Her own mind whirled, a result of both the strong wine and the sudden realization that she really didn’t _know_ Jamie at all. Though they had shared pieces of their pasts with each other, neither of them had broached the subject of the future, and she had no idea what Jamie’s plans were, nor he of hers.

She had fallen hard for Jamie, had allowed her heart to run away from her and now here she sat, not even a month later, at a table with his family, whom she knew nothing about, realizing that she had no idea whether he envisioned any sort of future with her in it. They would both be graduating in May, and what then? Was she really naive enough to think that her presence in his life could have any bearing on the choices he made after that?

She asked herself if she would let him influence her future plans, and she realized that the answer was _yes_. But was that fair or even reasonable? The road that lay ahead of her had always been her own to choose and, after all her hard work, didn't she owe it to herself to make any future decisions on her own?

She felt very cold and her skin must have gone pale, because Jamie leaned over to her and whispered, " Are ye alright?" She clamped her mouth shut and shook her head, a gesture that caused a wave of nausea and dizziness to wash over her. "Do ye need to go?" he asked. She nodded, and Jamie immediately pushed his chair back, announcing, "I'm so sorry but we have to go. Claire isn't feeling well."

She stood shakily, apologizing. The rest happened in a whirl as she struggled to hold on to reality. Their coats were fetched, and Jamie escorted her out. She barely remembered any of it by the time she was laying in the back of the town car with her head in his lap. He ran his fingers through her hair and whispered to her in Gaelic and she closed her eyes, knowing that there were going to be some difficult conversations ahead, but wanting to savor this moment of peace for just a little while longer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Moodboard by @charmingdearie  
> Thanks to both @alienoutlander and @preciouslittleingenue for being betas.


	9. I'll Be There for You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the aftermath of Thanksgiving, Jamie and Claire face a pivotal point in their relationship.

[ ](https://ibb.co/GFmp81c)

Claire and Jamie quietly entered her apartment. During the silent ride home, he had begun to suspect that there was something wrong with her beyond feeling physically unwell.

His suspicions were confirmed when she headed directly to the bedroom upon their arrival, giving no indication of invitation for him to join her. She emerged a few minutes later dressed in sweatpants and a t-shirt. She tied her hair up into a messy bun; bobby pins that would be used to tame any stray curls held between her clamped lips. When she had fixed herself to the best of her abilities, she turned to Jamie and said quietly, “It might be better if you go back to your dorm tonight."

Jamie’s brow furrowed and he shook his head. His eyes searched her face for an explanation. “Why, Claire? What did I do? I dinna ken what’s happening here.”

She answered him, shakily, avoiding his eyes. “I think we need to slow things down.” She walked into the kitchen and busied herself pretending to rummage through the refrigerator, which was mostly empty.

Jamie followed her in, standing on the other side of the refrigerator door. “Claire, talk to me. What did I do? Help me understand.”

She sighed and closed the door. “You didn’t do anything Jamie. I just realized today that this is all moving too fast. I mean, for god’s sake, we’ve only been dating for what, three weeks and I’m already having Thanksgiving dinner with your extended family?”

She brushed past him; he reached out to grab her arm, but hesitated, not wanting to push or make her feel uncomfortable. She sat on the futon and he stayed back, leaning against the kitchen counter. “We can slow things down, Claire. I didna mean to make you feel this way. You take the lead on pace, ok?”

She shook her head, fighting back the tears that she did not want to shed in front of him. She had to be strong until she could be alone and fall apart. “Jamie, it’s not about pace! I can’t let this go on any longer. We’re moving too fast and there’s no way to slow it except to stop it.” The look on his face almost crushed her resolve completely. “I am quite possibly going to be leaving this summer. Wherever I get into Med School, I have to go. And you’ll be…I don’t know…whatever it is you’re going to do for your Uncle. Fucking off to the Middle East to broker real estate deals.”

“Claire, I’m no – “

“Let me finish. This isn’t going to work. I have a goal, and I’m going to achieve it no matter what, and you have your family’s business. There are very few scenarios in the plethora of possibilities where this works out.”

“Jesus, Claire, will you – “

“I am not done.” She had to keep moving, quickly, before she fell apart. “I can’t be distracted by this and I certainly can’t afford to mess up Med School by trying to keep a long-distance relationship working. I’m not like you – I don’t have rich relatives around the corner.” She spat out that last part, hoping to anger him, make him leave, anything to get that horrible pained look off his face.

“Is that what this is about, Claire?” he asked, moving around the counter and toward her. “Are ye still sore that I didna tell you about my Uncle?”

Her arms were crossed on her chest and she shook her head and rolled her eyes. “No Jamie, I’m not mad about that and I’m not jealous either. It’s not about your Uncle; though it does make me look at you different, knowing you’re going to go work for that man. I’m sorry, Jamie. I know he’s family, but he’s a pretty detestable person.”

Exhausted, Jamie sank down on the futon next to her, attempting to curl his legs up into some sort of position that would be comfortable. The night before, they had made love on the futon and, afterward, he had lain with his head in her lap, legs curled up comfortably. It hadn’t been the height of luxury, but it was leaps and bounds from where he was in that moment. “Claire, I’m no’ going to work for my Uncle. I told him I would think about it to get him off my back. Announcing it like that in front of witnesses, well, that was a very _MacKenzie_ thing to do.” He paused, rolling his eyes. “I should have warned ye, Claire, and I’m sorry for that. I thought that maybe he would be on his best behavior with you there, but I should have known better.”

Claire’s breathing was calming, distracted by this new thread of thoughts. “Your Uncle Dougal wasn’t on his best behavior either,” she said, and told him of their encounter in the hallway before dinner began.

Jamie clenched his fists, his face beet red with anger. “I’ll kill him,” he said in a voice that was very quiet, and yet somehow the fiercest thing Claire had ever heard in her life.

“I’m fine, Jamie. I can handle myself. There’s no reason to create anymore bad blood right now. Your uncles were already causing enough trouble between the two of them.”

“Aye, they were,” he replied. Claire gave him an expectant look and he knew that she was not going to settle for half answers. “Dougal wants me to join the military to follow in his footsteps. Colum obviously wants me to come work for his business. Hamish is only ten years old, so it will be years before he’s ready to follow in his father’s footsteps. Wi’ Colum’s health as bad as it is, he wants to be sure he has someone to take over for him. Dougal does no’ want that to happen. I dinna ken if he’s jealous or after Colum’s money or what, but he is so dead set on me not going to work for Colum, it seems he’ll have me off to war in the Middle East before that happens.”

"And you don't want to do either of those things?" she asked.

"No. I told ye before that even if I did become a military translator, I would be a contractor. I'll no' enlist. But that's just one possibility." He shrugged. "I'll figure it out. I just havena yet."

Claire spoke quietly, staring ahead as if in a daze. "I've always known. In the earliest memories I have, I knew I was meant to be a healer. I would rescue injured animals, bandage my friends' scraped knees. It's a calling for me, Jamie, a part of me. I'll do anything to see it through, sacrifice anything. Can you live with that, Jamie?"

Jamie swallowed hard, the fingers of his left hand tapping nervously on his leg. "Aye, Claire. I can. If it's a part of who you are, then how could I not accept it?"

"My last boyfriend, Frank, couldn't accept it. We broke up because of it." Jamie gave her a look, not letting her off the hook with half the story either. "He was a junior when I was a freshman. I fell for him, hard, and he basically took over my life. I barely made my own friends, outside of Gigi. He was my entire life. When his graduation was coming up, he asked me to marry him. I said yes, but then he told me he wanted me to leave school, or at the very least, finish my undergrad and then be done.

"We fought about it for a few weeks and then he just... dumped me. He was engaged to someone else within months. Even though it was for the best in the long run, it broke me. It took me a long time before I could trust anybody again."

Jamie's fists were balled up and resting on his legs. Through gritted teeth he replied, "I would never do that to ye, Claire. I would never ask you to give up something that was important to ye. And I would never leave ye like that."

"I know you wouldn't, Jamie." She felt the anger that had subsided start to rise again. "That's not the problem."

"I dinna understand, then, Claire. What is the problem?" He was clearly starting to lose his patience.

She glared at him. "The problem is that I would do it anyway," she said as the tears began to fall. These were not tears of heartbreak or sadness, though. They were the bitter, traitorous tears of anger. "I realized today that I would do it for you. And that really pissed me off, because nobody has ever made me feel that way before. And I'm angry at myself for letting this all get out of hand and for letting myself fall for you."

Jamie desperately wanted to hold her, but she was wound up like tripwire, and he didn't dare set _those_ pyrotechnics off. "I wouldna let ye do that. It's no’ just that I wouldn't ask it of ye, but I wouldna _let_ you do it to yourself."

Her anger had not subsided. "So what? You just let your whole life center around me and my dreams? And you're willing to do that for someone you just met? You say that now, Jamie, but what are you going to do in May, when I have to move to California or East Bumfuck Kansas?"

“I’ll go wi’ ye Claire, wherever ye end up,” he answered quietly.

She glared at him, her amber eyes burning, “Stop it, Jamie. That’s foolish. You’re going to promise to uproot your whole life, your entire future, for a girl you've barely known three weeks? Get real, Jamie.” She rolled her eyes sarcastically, turning her face away from him so that he could not see the tears streaming down her face.

“Claire, listen to me, please. Hear me out, ok?” he asked, grasping her shoulders and searching her face so that their eyes could meet. When she finally allowed him to find hers, she simply nodded, sniffling and wiping her nose on her sleeve. “I have never been like other men, I think. I dinna have a path that I see laid out before me. I’ve always just put one foot in front of the other, step after step. But, Claire, now that I’ve met you, I ken that all of those steps were leading me right here, to you. I dinna care if the rest of the world thinks that we are moving too fast. All I know is that this, what it is between us, is _right._ It is the way things are supposed to be, and to hear you say that you aren’t sure or that you might not feel the same way…yer tearin’ my guts out, Claire.”

Claire’s shoulders tensed under his hands, and he braced himself for the blow that was sure to come. Instead, she moved her hands to him, cupping his face. “I’m sorry, Jamie. Please forgive me.”

He pulled one of her hands off his face and kissed the palm gently. “Forgiven. Can ye forgive me for making such a mess of today?”

She nodded. "Forgiven." They were both completely still for a moment and then she asked, "What's next? How do we move forward?" She was surrendering herself to him, letting him take the lead.

He adjusted his legs and leaned back, pulling her to him. "First, we get you a real couch."

She laughed, smacking him gently on the chest before resting her head on it. "I'm serious, Jamie."

He put his arms around her and kissed the top of her head. " _Mo nighean donn._ " He paused, considering. "I think we need to do this our own way. We need tae stop worrying about how we think he _should_ act or _should_ feel. I ken this has all happened fast, but who's to say that isna how it was supposed to happen. We need to be real with each other, honest; we shouldna hold back our feelings out of doubt that we should be having them. And we should share what we want with each other, even if it seems too much or too scary. And then promise, have an understanding between us, that if one of us wants something the other doesn't, we be honest about it and no' resentful or scared."

She snuggled in closer to him, curling up her legs and settling into him. Her cheeks were still stained with tears, but she was smiling. "I can promise that, Jamie."

"Aye, so can I."

"So, what's next?"

"Right now? Right now, I need _food._ " His stomach growled to illustrate his point.

"Good luck with that. There's no food in this place and nothing's open." She groaned imagining them sharing her last two eggs and the ends of a loaf of bread.

"Let's order Chinese, then."

***

Claire spread some blankets on the floor, and they ate a picnic of take-out, sharing their meals, _General Tso's, extra spicy, with egg rolls_ for Jamie _, chicken lo mein_ and _crab rangoon_ for Claire _._ They smoked a joint and watched _2001: A Space Odyssey_. They made love slowly and gently; an apology for the mishaps of the day, and a promise to move past it together.

After, they lay curled up together; Jamie behind her, one leg flung over hers, his arms around her. The floor was uncomfortable, but both were loath to disturb this moment. When he thought she was asleep, he kissed the back of her head and whispered, " _Mo chridhe."_

She turned her head slightly. "Are you ever going to tell me what that means?" She could feel him swallow hard against the back of her head. "No holding back, remember?" she said, reaching her hand behind her to pat him gently on the leg.

"It means, _my heart_."

In response she wiggled and pulled his arms around her more tightly, drifting off to sleep.

***

The next day they ate breakfast at a diner near Claire’s apartment. Jamie wrinkled his nose as Claire ordered corned beef hash with her omelet. "It looks like dog food," he declared. Claire made a big show of enjoying it while she ate.

Rolling his eyes, Jamie changed the subject. "Do ye want to go shopping? I have to get some presents for wee Jamie and the new baby." Jamie's sister was due on January 2nd and there would be a small shower for her the Saturday before Christmas. "Will ye come? And stay for Christmas?"

Claire laughed hysterically at that until she saw the confused and slightly hurt look in Jamie's eyes. She wiped away her laugh tears and said, "I'm sorry, Jamie. Of course, I'll come. I'm just thinking about the irony of you asking me that after yesterday." She stifled another giggle as his face relaxed."

"Aye, well I promise it willna be like my Uncle's. Though Jenny can be a tough nut to crack sometimes." He reached across the table and grabbed both her hands in his. "It'll be just fine, Claire. I canna wait to show ye Lallybroch."

"Lallybroch?"

"Aye, it's the name of the farm; same as the one we lost in Scotland. My Da wanted to honor it when they came here."

"Sounds lovely. I can't wait to see it."

Jamie took care of the check and they headed out into the cold, damp November air. They stuck to some of the less crowded, off-the-grid shops for their shopping. Jamie picked up some _GI Joe_ s for his namesake and Claire got him _Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles_ action figures.

"Should I get something for anyone else?" she asked. She had not had a family Christmas celebration of her own since she was five, so she was unsure of the etiquette.

"We do a White Elephant for the adults. Ye just need tae pick up something under $20. It can be a gag gift or something...normal." His smile was contagious. "Most everyone does a gag gift." Claire looked uncertain. "Dinna fash. I'll help ye pick something out."

"Hmmmmm, maybe we could go to the mall next week and look around. Spencer's might have some good stuff," Claire said thoughtfully.

Jamie's face changed so quickly, Claire almost burst out laughing. If he’d had a string of pearls around his neck, he would have clutched them. " _Spencer's_?!?!? Sassenach, ye want to make a _good_ impression on my family, not make them think you're a degenerate!"

She did laugh at that, clutching his arm and resting her head on his chest for a moment. "Maybe I _am_ a degenerate. Did you ever think of that?"

"Aye, but yer _my_ degenerate," he replied, pulling her in for a kiss.

An older woman who was making her way through the toy aisle stopped and smiled at them. "You two make a lovely couple," she said. "Bless the two of you."

After they had completed their purchases they walked again toward Claire’s apartment. They passed a thrift shop, and Claire told Jamie she wanted to stop in to look around. They roamed through the claustrophobic store, picking up various items, laughing at the kitsch of some of the merchandise. Claire thumbed through the records, wishing she had a record player.

They reached the back of the store, where the larger items were displayed, and both stopped in their tracks when they saw it. The couch was made of heavy dark wood and the upholstery was a mustard yellow. It was slightly smaller than a regular couch but larger than a loveseat. It was ugly and old fashioned and _perfect_. No words were necessary. Jamie squeezed Claire’s hand and they hurried home to drop off their purchases from earlier.

Huffing and puffing, talking to each other through gritted teeth, they managed to remove the futon and set it out on the curb. The store was only two blocks away, but Claire wondered sarcastically if their relationship could survive the trip back with the new-to-them furniture.

Survive they did, though. After returning to purchase the couch, they carried it back, eliciting stares the whole way. Their laughing made the chore even more difficult.

They barely managed to get it through the front door; they had to try several angles before it squeezed through. Dragging it to the spot where the futon had stood, they collapsed onto it, laughing and breathing heavily. When he caught his breath, Jamie pulled her in for a soft but deep kiss. She sighed into his mouth when he pulled away, and he pushed one of her curls behind her ear. "We've purchased furniture together now, Sassenach. Ye ken that means we have to stay together _at least_ until this couch falls apart."

"I think the rule is that we have to christen it immediately for good luck," she replied.

"Aye," he leaned back and pulled her on top of him. "Let's make sure we take care of that immediately."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you so much to @AlienOutlander for being my beta and @charmingdearie for the mood board!!!!!


	10. Holiday Road

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jamie and Claire travel to Lallybroch for Christmas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoy the next few chapters spending Christmas at Lallybroch :)

[ ](https://ibb.co/2kJ3LvZ)

November faded into December. Jamie and Claire were both busy finishing up the fall semester, but they spent every weekend together. Jamie took the train in as soon as possible after his last class and returned to school on the early train each Monday.

He loved their weekends together. Fridays would be a double date with Gillian and her latest squeeze ( _three weekends, three different squeezes so far_ ). Saturdays meant sleeping in and getting coffee at the small Cafe around the corner from her apartment before going grocery shopping. They would spend the afternoon studying, at least for as long as they could before one of them would eventually reach for the other. A gentle hand placed on a thigh, or a kiss that was meant to be chaste, would draw them to each other like magnets and, before they knew it, hands would be down each other's pants and clothing thrown about the living room. They took full advantage of the new couch, which had seen unspeakable things in its short time in Claire’s living room.

When they were sated and the sun was going down, they would put on music and go about the business of getting ready for a night out. Claire would eventually coax Jamie into dancing with her and, though he always felt terribly awkward, he loved the feeling of holding her in his arms, feeling her hips sway and hearing her giggle when he twirled or dipped her. She was beautiful, always, but when she was in his arms, with that smile he thought of as being just for him, he felt like the luckiest man to ever walk the earth and wondered what he had done to deserve such a gorgeous creature.

Eventually they would meet Claire’s friends out at a bar or small music venue. Jamie came to truly enjoy their company; even the shy Mary Hawkins, who he found to be quite a canty lass once she had stopped trembling every time he spoke to her. He and Isobel continued to be fast friends; she was a gentle soul, quiet and humble with a sharp sense of humor. She was clearly enamored of her fiancé, but Jamie sensed the feelings were not reciprocated by John. He liked John, but when he saw them together, there was an uneasiness. It was hard from him to put his finger on; a subtle shift away when she came near him, the cursory way he kissed her when he would relent and allow for a little PDA.

Jamie mentioned his observations to Claire one night, lying in bed after a night out. They were naked and sweating after a particularly vigorous romp, and they clung to each other, craving the touch of one another still. "It's no' that he does anything outright rude to her, but he seems…. dismissive. It's like he tolerates her, and she's so verra smart and easy to get along with."

"If you're so enamored of her, maybe I should fix you two up," Claire teased, playfully smacking his bottom.

He growled and nibbled at her neck. "No, Sassenach, you're the only woman for me. It's just that I don't see that with John and Isobel, the way it is with us. I can catch yer eye from across a crowded room and know that ye have eyes only for me." He rolled onto his back, one arm crooked behind his head, and Claire shifted, snuggling under the other arm and resting her head on his chest.

"That's because it's true, Jamie." She kissed the hollow above his collarbone. "But I don't think every couple has to be like that. They've been together a lot longer, too."

"Time doesn't matter, Sassenach. I'll ken when we're old and grey and wielding canes, we still willna be able to keep our hands from each other." He reached his hand around and grabbed a handful of her buttock, making her squeal and giggle.

"You are quite the ass man, James Fraser."

"Stop trying to change the subject."

"Why are you so concerned about this? If they're happy, who cares?"

"I dinna think they're happy; that's the problem," he replied, troubled.

"It's not our business, Jamie."

"I s'pose it's not. I just dinna want to see Isobel get hurt."

"I love how much you care about people, Jamie." She gave him a gentle kiss that turned into a yawn.

"Aye. I willna fash about it anymore, _mo chridhe_ , go to sleep now."

***

**_December 20, 1991_ **

The third weekend in December, though, was different. With their exams over, they were both headed upstate to Lallybroch for the holidays. They would stay there for ten days, returning back to Manhattan to celebrate New Year at Claire’s apartment with their friends.

Claire was buzzing with nervous energy as she boarded the train to Long Island to meet Jamie. She thought it was ridiculous that she was going in the opposite direction than they needed to go, but Jamie wanted to bring his car so they would have more freedom once they had arrived at Lallybroch. He refused, however, to drive in Manhattan, typically keeping his car on campus and only using it for driving around his small college towns or trips back home, so they had ultimately decided that the best thing to do would be for Claire to take the train to him.

She settled in her seat and reached into her bag, pulling out a book. Reading for pleasure for the first time in months, she soon found herself engrossed in the novel. The hour-long trip flew by and, before she knew it, she was wrenching her larger suitcase from the overhead racks and exiting the train.

Jamie was waiting for her, right on the platform. They hadn't even discussed how she would find him when she got there and, as usual, he handled it in the most thoughtful way. Taking her luggage off her hands, Jamie embraced her as if they had been separated for four months instead of four days, and she thanked him by kissing him deeply, ignoring the stares of the other passengers. "Ye look bonny in that wee hat," Jamie teased, grabbing a hold of the pom-pom on the top of her winter cap.

They turned and headed toward the parking lot, Jamie carrying all but her purse for her. She thought he looked _bonny,_ himself; his red flannel shirt peeped out from under his black coat. The jacket had made the hem of the shirt lift a bit, and Claire allowed herself to fall behind him briefly to behold the sight of his ass in jeans. _You're not the only one around here who appreciates a nice ass, Jamie Fraser._

He turned around and gave her a look. "C'mon, Beauchamp. Stop treating me like a piece of meat and let's get going."

She blushed and picked up her pace again. They reached his car which turned out to be a Chrysler New Yorker. Laughing as Jamie threw her bags in the trunk, she teased, "You didn’t tell me we were taking a boat."

Jamie gave her one of his signature ‘ _I'm pretending to be stern with you but I'm really just teasing you’_ looks and patted the top of the trunk reverently after he had closed it. "She didna mean to say such a thing, Bonny."

Claire sputtered out a laugh and rolled her eyes. "You named your car?" she asked, opening the passenger door and climbing in.

"Aye," he replied, getting in on the driver's side. "Why wouldna my lass have a name?"

Claire rolled her eyes and scooted over on the plush bench seat. She buckled into the middle and rested her head on Jamie's shoulder. _A large car does have its advantages_ , she thought. Jamie popped a cassette into the tape deck. "Made a little mix for our first road trip." He put his hands at ten and two and maneuvered the car out of the parking lot as _Smells Like Teen Spirit_ blasted from the speakers.

Claire watched in amusement as Jamie kept both hands firmly on the steering wheel, leaning forward slightly, shoulders tense. He was, apparently, a very nervous driver. Claire watched him silently as he drove along the streets of Rockville Center. He made a complete stop at every stop sign and never missed a chance to use his turn signal. As they rolled onto the highway, Claire watched the speedometer and saw that he never went over the speed limit by even one mile per hour.

She leaned forward to turn the music up slightly and Jamie took his eyes off the road for a second to make sure she wasn't turning it up _too_ loud. Sighing, Claire sat back in the seat and put her hand on Jamie's thigh. He gave her a small smile, his lip curling up on one side in _that way_ that drove her absolutely made. With her own wicked smile on her face, she gently moved her thumb back and forth, watching his face for a response. _Nothing_. Growing bolder, she squeezed his thigh and then rubbed her hand up and down on it. _What is he bloody made of? Stone?_ Ever so slowly, she moved her hand higher and higher. When she had reached its apex, she reached further until her hand was firmly cupping his crotch.

Jamie jerked the wheel; the car swerved, and Claire quickly removed her hand. When they were safely back in their lane, he turned to her. "Are ye mad, woman?"

"I'm sorry, Jamie. I was just trying to help you relax. I didn't-"

"Relax? With your hand on my cock distracting me from the road?" The look on his place showed pure shock and Claire laughed in spite of herself.

"I'm sorry. And I'm sorry I'm laughing. You were just so...serious. I was just trying to lighten the mood. I'll behave, I promise." She carefully cuddled up against him.

"It's alright, Sassenach. I know I drive like an auld man. I promise I'll relax once we get further upstate; I just hate dealing with all these crazy drivers down here." He briefly took one hand off the wheel and patted her thigh.

"Well, seeing as you're going five miles per hour under the speed limit, I can see this is going to take a while. I'm going to take a nap. She rested her head on his shoulder, closing her eyes.

When she woke, rubbing the sleep from her eyes and squinting at the break afternoon sun, the scenery outside had completely changed. The concrete sound barriers and packed neighborhoods they had passed as they had driven around the city had given way to snow-caked trees with rolling mountains in the distance. Her Uncle's travels had taken her all around the world; but, while the Northern hemisphere was a winter wonderland, they had typically been in the Southern hemisphere, sweating in the heat of summer. It wasn’t that she had never seen snow before, but that she had never seen it this way, blanketed over everything. It gave her a sense of peace that she couldn't quite explain.

"Where are we?" she finally asked.

"Just about thirty minutes south of Albany. We'll be home in about an hour and fifteen minutes, unless ye need to stop now." His face had relaxed and his grip on the wheel no longer made his fingers white at the tips.

"Hmmmm…" she replied. "It's gorgeous here."

Jamie laughed. "This is just the view from the highway, Sassenach. Wait til we get out in the country and to the farm."

"I can't wait," she said as she snuggled up close to him.

"Sassenach?"

"Hmmmmm?"

"What were ye goin tae do tae me earlier when ye were grabbin at my cock?"

"Haven't you ever heard of road head, Jamie?"

"Aye, I have." He turned his head to look at her and raised his eyebrows, a sure sign he was feeling frisky.

"Oh, I see," she teased, placing her hand on his thigh. "You bit my head off about it before, but now you want me to do it?"

"Weel, once I got away from the Downstate traffic, I started thinking about it, and it's been making my balls ache."

"Is it, now?" She reached her hand between his legs and gave him a squeeze.

Jamie groaned. "Ye have a healthy grip, Sassenach."

"Let's see what we can do about those aching balls, now, shall we? Can you put the seat back a little more?" He reached under the seat and pushed it back another click. Claire unzipped his fly and reached her hand in his pants, groping in the flap of his boxers. "Now where?....Ah there we are." He was already half hard and she wrapped her hand around his length as she freed him from his clothing. It took very little fondling before he was swollen and erect. "That does look painful."

Jamie tried his hardest to keep his breathing steady. "Oh God, Claire."

Claire wrapped her hand around the base of his cock. She had never particularly enjoyed giving blowjobs before; she'd done so because it pleased her partner only. But it was different with Jamie. She loved to tease him, loved the feel of him when he filled her mouth, loved the noises he couldn't help but make.

She unbuckled her seat belt and positioned herself so that her mouth could reach him. She used her tongue to gently flick at the head and he jerked, emitting a low groan. Smiling to herself, she ran her tongue along the long vein that ran from base to tip. He shuddered and mumbled, " _Iffrin."_

Pleased with herself, she took him in her mouth, a little at a time, while her hand pumped up and down at the base. His grunting and panting encouraged her, and she removed her hand so that she could take him in as far as her mouth would permit. Over and over, she filled her mouth with him, occasionally dragging her teeth gently along his length as she moved up. " _Ah Dhia,_ Claire, I'm so close."

She put her hand back to work and increased her speed, hand and mouth working in perfect tandem. She felt him begin to quiver and sucked harder, driving him to his end. One of his hands was in her hair, rubbing and kneading as she worked. " _Christ Claire!"_ he gasped as he released his juices into her mouth. He gripped the steering wheel with one hand while banging his other on the steering wheel.

When he was done, Claire sat up, wiping her mouth with a smug smile on her face. She helped him zip his pants back up and leaned against the seat back. The dazed smile on his face was all she needed to see in that moment. "Was it like you thought it would be?"

"I canna say I ever gave it much thought, aside from the two hours when ye were sleeping before, but I can easily say that it exceeded any expectations I had, ye wee vixen." She gave him a wicked smile before resting her head on his shoulder again.

***

Jamie was right about the scenery getting prettier the closer they got to his home. After they exited the Thruway, they were soon driving along country highways surrounded by nothing but farmhouses and snow-covered pastures. She moved closer to the passenger door and stared out the window like a small child. "How close are we, Jamie?"

"Only a few more minutes, lass. Lallybroch is just up this way." They rounded over a small hill and Jamie put his blinker on, turning onto a long dirt-road; gravel crunched under the tires as they slowed to a crawl. Jamie reached over and grabbed Claire’s hand. "Here it is," he said as they pulled up to the house.

Claire wasn't sure what she had been expecting, but it certainly wasn't the large red farm-house that was before her. The entire wrap-around porch was edged with Christmas lights and in the large bow windows was the biggest Christmas tree she had ever seen, at least in someone's home. "Oh, Jamie, it's…." For once in her life, she was at a loss for words.

"Home," he said, taking her hands in his. "I want ye tae feel like this is your home too, Claire." He leaned in to kiss her softly, but Claire pulled him in closer, parting her lips and inviting his tongue in. He grabbed a handful of curls at the back of her head and kissed her deeply.

They were interrupted by a loud rapping on Jamie's window. They both pulled apart, gasping. Claire looked over Jamie's shoulder, her eyes connected with another set of blue cat eyes sizing her up through the window. Jamie turned then and saw his sister, who was signaling to him to roll the window down. He did so and before it was all the way down, Jenny Fraser Murray was leaning into the car, eyes blazing with mischief. "If yer done eating yer trollop's face, mebbe ye could bless us with yer presence in the house, _a_ _bràthair_." Not waiting for a response, she stood straight and headed back to the house, her nine months pregnant frame moving quickly despite her size.

Jamie turned to Claire and gave her a sheepish grin. "Welcome to Lallybroch!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you @charmingdearie for the moodboard, as always :)


	11. Wonderful Christmastime

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Claire meets the Fraser Clan; Jenny & Claire butt heads.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wanted to say hello and thank you for following this story and for all your lovely comments. This story is so fun to write and I love immersing myself in the 90s nostalgia.
> 
> I am trying to keep myself to a schedule moving forward, so if all goes according to plan, I will be posting a new chapter every Thursday.

[ ](https://ibb.co/HKZrbVN)

Jamie reached to unbuckle his seat belt, grasping and fumbling in his anger. Before Claire could even catch her breath, he was out of the car and storming into the house behind his sister. Claire sighed and rubbed her temples with the tips of her fingers, then slowly unbuckled. She grabbed her purse and walked slowly into the house.

The front door opened onto a large, open room with exposed beams and hardwood floors. The room was filled with overstuffed chairs and couches with red plaid upholstery. The brackets that lined the room several feet below the ceiling were filled with various bric-a-brac – old fashioned _Coca Cola_ bottles, statuettes of various farm animals, snow globes – and the walls were decorated with various pictures and paintings, as well as a pair of large broadswords that hung crisscross over the fireplace.

Claire could hear Jamie and his sister arguing in the other room. Unsure of what to do with herself, she entered the room and started looking more closely at the pictures. "That one's Jamie and Jenny when we first moved here," said a male voice behind her.

Claire jumped, clutching her hand to her chest. She turned and saw a lanky man, almost as tall as Jamie, wearing a Grateful Dead t-shirt, standing in the doorway where Claire had come in. His long dirty blonde hair was pulled back into a ponytail and he walked with a slight limp as he approached Claire. "I'm sorry," he said, reaching out a hand to her. "I didna mean tae scare ye. Ian Murray, and you must be…"

Claire took Ian's hand and shook it. "Claire. Claire Beauchamp."

"It's good tae meet ye, lass. Welcome to Lallybroch. Please, sit down." He gestured to one of the overstuffed armchairs.

She smiled pleasantly and shook her head. "No thank you. I've been sitting far too long in the car."

Ian nodded and went over to a small bar in the corner of the room. "Whisky?" he offered, pouring the amber liquid into a glass.

"That sounds perfect," she replied, taking the glass from him. The sounds of Jamie and Jenny's argument drifted into the room.

_"Do I have to do what I did when we were bairns and grab you by the bullocks so ye'll listen to me?"_

_"Will you stop trying to embarrass me in front of my girlfriend?_

_"Well, if she's your girlfriend, she's probably more familiar with your balls than I am!"_

Claire blushed and looked away from Ian. "I think I'll just go pop in and see -"

"Better not," Ian said, sipping from his own glass. "Ye try to get between those two when their danders are up and yer likely to get bit for your trouble."

"So, we just...wait?" Claire asked, taking a sip of the whisky. "Ooh, that's good."

Ian nodded and gestured to the chair again, "Are ye sure ye dinna want to sit?"

Claire smiled and took him up on the offer this time. Ian went over the stereo and ran his fingers along the CDs. "Have ye ever heard of _Phish_?" he asked, holding up a CD.

"No, I'm sorry, I haven't. But I love discovering new music. Go ahead." Claire gestured to the stereo and Ian popped in the CD. He gently tossed the case to Claire. She inspected the cover and song list before handing it back to Ian. "They have an interesting sound."

"Ye may not have heard of them yet, but I ken they'll be famous soon enough. Jenny and I saw them in Vermont on tour this summer." He placed the case back in its place and sat down in the chair next to Claire’s. "So, when I can actually get Jamie on the phone these days, he tells me that yer pre-med at NYU."

"Yes, just finished my second to last semester. I'll be going on to -"

Claire was interrupted by the sound of the front door opening. Filling the entryway was a tall man with jet black hair, and when he turned his gaze into the living room, Claire could see that he had the same blue cat-eyes as Jamie. She smiled and stood up. "Och! Ye must be Claire. Hold on, let me knock the snow off my boots a minute. I've been out fetching the tree fer us to decorate tonight. Oh! Ye have no idea how happy I am to meet ye." Freed of his boots he walked into the living room and enveloped Claire in a bear hug. She could not help but be charmed by Jamie's father and hugged him back. When they pulled apart, he held Claire by the shoulders and said, "Let me look at ye! Jamie told me ye were the prettiest lass he'd ever laid eyes on, but I didna believe him until I got a look at ye."

Claire smiled, blushing. "Ian," Brian Fraser went on. "Did ye see that smile? No wonder Jamie fell head over heels."

Ian chuckled, "Aye, she is bonny."

"Where is the lad?" Brian asked looking around the room as if Jamie would be hiding behind a piece of furniture.

"In the kitchen, wi' Jenny," Ian replied, gesturing with his head, just as a loud crashing sound came from the same direction.

" _Iffrin_!" Brian growled as he stalked off in the direction of his two warring children.

"Dinna fash," Ian told Claire."Brian will have them sorted in a moment."

Brian's voice bellowed in the other room and the sound of voices swelled momentarily but soon quieted. A few moments later Jamie walked in the room, followed by Brian. "Sassenach, I'm sorry," he said, walking over to her and giving her a kiss on the cheek. "I see ye've met my Da and Ian."

Claire smiled but before she could say anything, Jenny was standing in the doorway, hands on her hips astride her gigantic belly. "Come on everyone. Lunch is ready and it willna keep. I'll just go fetch wee Jamie from his nap. Go on then, everything is laid out." With that, she turned and waddled away.

***

Lunch was a cheerful affair; even the occasional dirty look from Jamie's sister couldn't dampen Claire’s mood. The wine was plentiful, and Claire felt herself being sucked into the fold of this warm, happy family. She tried to remember any similar experience in her past but came up short. Everybody was talking over one another, eager to swap stories, especially those at the expense of one another. Claire could easily see where Jamie got his quick wit and teasing nature from.

When the meal was over, Claire offered to help Jenny with the clean-up, but Jenny refused. "I'll no' have a guest helping with dishes. You have Jamie bring yer bags in from the car." She stuck her head out into the living room where Jamie had already gone with Ian. "Jamie! Quit yer yappin' and bring in yer suitcases. I've made up yer bedroom for ye and I've set up the guest room for Claire." Not allowing any room for questions, she turned and walked into the kitchen.

Claire followed Jamie to the front door, throwing on her coat. "Guest room?" she mouthed at him.

He shook his head and mouthed back, "Outside."

She followed him to the car. As soon as they were behind the open trunk away from prying eyes, he grabbed her around the waist and kissed her deeply. When they parted, Claire nuzzled into his chest, "Mmmmm, what was that for?" she asked.

"Because I canna stand being in the same room wi' ye wi'out having my hands on ye." He rubbed her back with one hand and massaged her bottom with the other. “That round arse has been teasing me from under that sweater all day."

"What's this about the guest room?" she asked.

Jamie groaned. "My sister isna happy that I brought ye here for family Christmas. She says I've only been dating ye for a couple months, so it's an intrusion on family time."

Claire pulled away from Jamie. "Well that certainly doesn't make me feel very comfortable, Jamie. We're planning to be here for the next ten days!"

He tucked a stray hair behind her ear and kissed the tip of her nose. "Dinna fash. That's just the way she is. Once she gets tae know ye, I ken she'll see that yer family."

"So, having me sleep in the guest room is her way of showing me that I'm not really welcome? This should be fun." Claire rolled her eyes. "Jamie, I don't want to sleep without you."

Jamie started pulling the luggage from the trunk. "Dinna fash. I'll come to ye. Besides, ye dinna want to sleep in my room anyway; I've only got a single bed."

They collected the luggage and took it upstairs, first dropping Jamie's bags in his small room. Taking a peek at the sparsely decorated space, with just enough room for a small bed, dresser, and desk, Claire did think perhaps it was better to have a larger room for herself.

Jamie walked her down the hall and opened the door to the guest room. It was a bright, airy room decorated with floral patterns, with a Queen-sized bed. “Ooohhh,” Claire said, dropping her luggage and hopping onto the bed, “This bed is bigger than my one at home.”

Seeing Claire on the bed, Jamie abandoned the luggage he was carrying. He kicked the door closed and approached Claire, like a lion about to pounce on its prey. Claire giggled as he leapt onto the bed, knocking her onto her back in the process. “Oh gawd, I need to have ye, Claire. I canna see ye in those wee leggings any longer.” He was on all fours above her, frantically kissing her anywhere he could reach bare skin, face, mouth, and collar bone. “Christ, ye look so bonny today.” His hand slid up her sweater and she moaned as he reached into her bra and caressed her nipple. “Yer driving me mad.” He fumbled with the zipper of his jeans, all while he attempted to continue kissing Claire and keep one hand in her shirt. Claire wiggled and started to lift her shirt over her head.

They were so focused on undressing that they did not hear the click of the door or the quiet squeak as it was slowly opened. They did, however, hear the door slam and a small voice on the other side cry out, “They’re up here Ma! I think Uncle Jamie is wrestling with his friend!” They froze in place and Claire dissolved into giggles, while Jamie rolled off her, groaning.

Claire rolled toward Jamie and gave his very obvious erection a small pat. “Sorry, Little Soldier,” she giggled, “we’ll have to take care of you later.”

***

Brian had brought the Christmas tree in and, after some rearranging of furniture, had set it up in the living room. Ian and Jamie dragged bin after bin of ornaments down from the attic. Claire helped Jenny string the lights which, thankfully, they pulled off with little aggravation. After that, it was a free-for-all; everybody grabbed for ornaments and tried to select the best placement for them, while Brian stood back and observed, giving small nods of approval or tiny frowns before making some small adjustments. Wee Jamie, an impish boy of nearly three who took after his father in looks but resembled his namesake in behavior, stuck close to his Uncle’s side. Claire smiled at the way Jamie would place an ornament for him where he couldn’t reach, speaking in Gaelic and laughing with him all the while.

For the first time in her life, she felt a small wanting that settled as a knot in her stomach. She had never considered having children and had even gone so far as to tell Frank that she didn’t want them at all. Watching Jamie with his nephew, though, she started to imagine a life much like this with him and their own children; little curly haired toddlers following around their ever-attentive father. She blushed at the thought and hoped that if anyone noticed they would assume it was the whisky she had been sipping since they started the decorating.

When all the bins were emptied and Brian was satisfied with the results, Jamie lifted his nephew up on his shoulders and handed him the star. The little boy grinned widely and leaned over to place the star. Everyone cheered while Jamie placed him gently back on the ground, sticking out his hand for a high five.

Jenny collapsed on the couch and announced, “Dinner is fend-fer-yerselves! There’s plenty o’ leftovers from lunch and I don’t think I can move another inch today. She rubbed her large belly and Ian pulled over an ottoman to sit on while he rubbed her swollen feet.

Determined to connect with Jenny, Claire sat down next to her on the couch. “Jamie says you’re due the day after New Year’s,” she started. “Do you feel ready?”

“As ready as I’ll ever be, I supposed. I’m certainly ready to be rid of this aching back and swollen feet.”

“Do you think it’s going to be a boy or a girl?”

“I’m sure it will be another boy. Everything about this pregnancy has been the same as my first,” she replied, nodding in the direction of wee Jamie, who was wrestling with his uncle dangerously close to the Christmas tree.

“He’s an adorable child. I love getting to see Jamie with him.”

“Aye, he’ll be a good father one day, when he’s ready to settle down with the right woman,” Jenny replied.

Claire tried to hide the sting she felt from those words, but her face betrayed her. Jenny’s face softened a bit. “I didna mean to imply that wouldna be you, ye ken?” Claire nodded, unsure how to respond, but Jenny went on. “I ken my brother is head over heels for ye, but I dinna ken you at all. How could I ken if yer the right woman for him?”

Claire was both taken aback and thankful for Jenny’s frankness, which was preferable to the passive-aggression she had displayed most of the afternoon. “I know it seems like this all happened very fast,” Claire replied. “But if it makes you feel any better, I am head over heels for him too.”

Jenny nodded, nudging Ian away from her feet and adjusting herself. “I can see that, Claire. The two of ye look at each other like there’s no one else in the room. But I worry for Jamie, and that’s never going tae change, ye ken? He’s my little brother and I’ve been protecting him my whole life. It doesna come easy to see someone replacing me.”

Claire nodded, unsure of how to respond.

***

Much later that night, Claire could not sleep, despite Jamie's best efforts to tire her out thoroughly. For a while she watched him sleep. He was stretched out on his back, one arm crooked above his head, his red curls standing out on the white pillowcase. His broad chest moved up and down in the steady rhythm of sleep and every once in a while, he would smile in his sleep, looking like a contented child.

She grew restless, though, and decided to get out of bed, hoping a change of scenery would calm her mind and allow her to rest. She padded out into the hallway and crept down the stairs into the large living room. She had been intrigued by two of the paintings on the wall earlier in the day and decided to give them a closer inspection.

She turned on the Christmas tree lights, and their warm colorful glow filled the dark room. She could count on one hand the number of times she and Uncle Lamb had had a Christmas tree while she was growing up, and she felt a slight pang at having missed out on the experience. The lights made everything look peaceful, magical.

She walked over to the first painting; she saw an elegant woman with red hair, the same color as Jamie's. Her neck was long and elegant, giving the woman the look of royalty, and her piercing blue eyes stared back at Claire, giving her chills.

She had been so absorbed in the painting that she didn’t hear the sound of footsteps on the stairs, and was startled when Ian's voice said behind her, "So yer a night owl then?"

"Ian!" she whispered. "You have to stop sneaking up on me like that." She gave him a smile and went on. "Yes, I guess I am a bit of a night owl. You?"

"Aye, at times," he said. "My leg was paining me tonight though."

"Did you do something to hurt it?" she asked, concerned.

Ian chuckled softly and lifted the leg of his flannel pajama pants, revealing a prosthetic leg. "I guess ye could say that."

"I'm so sorry Ian. Jamie never mentioned…."

"Och, dinna fash. It happened some five years ago, now. Farming accident. The replacement does just fine in getting me around. It's just that on some nights I can still _feel_ my leg even though it isn't there, and it pains me quite a bit."

"Phantom limb syndrome," Claire said under her breath, remembering something she had read in one of her anatomy classes.

"Aye, that's right. I forgot Jamie said ye were going to be a doctor." Ian smiled at her. "Anyway, when it pains me like that, it helps to move around a bit, get the blood flowing to the limbs that _are_ there."

Claire nodded. "Well, since we're both here, can you tell me who is in this portrait? It's lovely."

"Aye, that's Jamie and Jenny's Ma, Ellen. It's a self-portrait, see?" He pointed to the small signature in the lower right-hand corner. _Ellen MacKenzie Fraser._ "This was one of the few things that was saved from the fire. When Jenny came screaming at our door in the middle of the night, my Da called the fire department and then ran to their house to see what he could do. He couldna get to any of them, the fire had already eaten the stairs, but he managed to save two of her portraits; he kent how much they meant to the whole family."

Claire swallowed hard, choking back tears at the memory of the night Jamie had told her about the fire. Jamie didn't talk about his mother, much, and she didn't ask him either, not wanting to bring up bad memories. "What was she like?"

"She was the sweetest woman ye could ever know, but wi' the wickedest temper. Ye didna want to cross her. She could smile at ye, one minute, and warm yer heart to the core, and the next minute reduce ye tae tears with her sharp tongue." He gave Claire a knowing look. "Jenny takes after her, ye ken?" Claire smiled and nodded at him. "She was like a Ma to me too; my own Ma died before I could even remember her."

"I'm sorry, Ian," Claire said softly, putting a hand on his arm. She moved toward the other portrait, picture of a young, dark-haired girl holding a bird in her hand. "Is this Jenny?" she asked.

"Aye, Jenny and one o' her wee birds. She would find injured birds, other animals too sometimes, and bring them to the house, nursing them back to health. Brian and Ellen both used tae joke that they would have to build an extra room on the house just for all her wee patients." He studied Claire’s face and smiled. "Are ye surprised she's got a soft side?"

Claire laughed quietly. "No, I suppose not, but it's hard to imagine."

"The most important thing to Jenny is her family. After the fire, and Jamie's recovery, she became even more protective of him than she'd ever been. She took her new role as the oldest verra seriously. Jamie is verra special to her. All yer seeing right now is that fierce mama bear instinct coming out o’ her. She sees how much her brother cares fer ye, and she just doesna want to see him hurt."

"I wouldn't hurt him, Ian. I - " she stopped herself, but Ian took her meaning.

"I ken. I see the way ye look at him, too. Jenny will come around. I promise ye that."

"Thank you, Ian." She gave him a small kiss on the cheek. "I'm glad for your company tonight. I think I’ll go back to bed now. I actually feel a lot better."

Quietly, she crept back up the stairs and crawled into bed with Jamie. He sensed her presence and rolled over to hold her. She curved her body to mold to his and fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Links to my other fics  
> [Clans of Anarchy](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24904606/chapters/60264403) \- An Outlander/Sons of Anarchy crossover in which Jamie Fraser struggles to reconcile the life of crime he lives with the life he truly wants with, Claire, the love of his life
> 
> [Prodigal Son](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24395800/chapters/58847287) \- A canon divergent Outlander story that begins in the year 1979
> 
> Follow me on twitter - @sassenach7471


	12. Santa Baby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Frasers have a surprise visitor; Jamie and Claire exchange Christmas presents.
> 
> NSFW!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so excited for this chapter. As I've planned out this Holiday arc, this particular part of the story has been at the center of my mind. I really hope you enjoy reading it as much as I've enjoyed writing it.
> 
> Thank you to charmingdearie for the mood board. She always captures exactly what I'm looking for chapter after chapter!

[ ](https://ibb.co/0ZszgRf)

The days leading up to Christmas went by slowly, but Jamie didn't mind. It was the first time he and Claire had spent any consecutive length of time together, and he was enjoying it thoroughly. Without the familiar patterns of their weekend routine, they were able to spend a new kind of quality time together - domestic and peaceful.

Claire fit in well with his family; she laughed at his father's ridiculous jokes, put up with Ian's constant chatter about jam bands, and played games with wee Jamie. And Jenny had stopped being openly hostile to her, which he supposed was a win. They had even banded together against Ian and Jamie when they went on a double date to the movies, _Father of the Bride_ winning out over _JFK_.

On the morning of Christmas Eve, Jamie woke early and slipped out of bed. The sun had not yet risen, and he plugged in the Christmas lights, bathing the living room in soft colors. He moved quietly into the kitchen only to find Jenny already up and drinking coffee at the small table. "Good morning, _a piuthar_. Yer up early." He gave her a small kiss on the top of her head.

"As are ye, _a bràthair_. I always get up early; it's the only time I can get any peace around here. But what's yer excuse?" she responded, looking at him over her mug.

Jamie walked over to the coffee maker and poured himself a mug. He sat down at the table next to Jenny and took a sip. "I wanted to make breakfast for everyone. Do we have ingredients for pancakes?"

"Aye, and there's sausages in the fridge ye can fry up too."

"Perfect," Jamie replied.

They both sipped their coffee in silence. It was the perfect time to bring up Jenny's attitude towards Claire, but he didn't want to ruin the moment. Jenny, however, had no such concern. "I ken ye've been sleepin' in the guest room."

"I have," he answered. "What of it?"

"Ye ken it's a sin to lie with a woman before yer marrit."

Jamie rolled his eyes. "Thank ye for the information, _St. Jenny of Lallybroch_ , but it's really none o' yer business."

"It's my business when it's happening under my roof!"

" _Yer_ roof? The last I checked, this house belongs to Da, no' you."

"And what would Da think if he kent?"

"Why dinna ye ask him? He passed me in the hall last night when I got up to take a pish and dinna seem all that concerned about what room I was coming out of. What's this really about, Jenny?

"I told ye I dinna like the idea of ye draggin' home a stray for family Christmas. Ye hardly ken her!"

Jamie slammed his hand on the table, causing coffee to splash out of mugs. Jenny jumped out of her seat. "Now look what ye did. Makin' a mess, disturbin' my peace!"

Jamie's chair made a horrible screeching sound as he pushed back from the table. "Sit down, Janet. I'll clean it up."

Jenny surprised him by lowering herself slowly back into the chair. Jamie came back with a cloth and quickly mopped up the spilled coffee before tossing it angrily at the sink. "If ye dinna have anything nice tae say about it, dinna say anything at all from now on."

Jenny raised her eyebrows and sipped her coffee. "Fine. My mouth will be closed on the subject of Claire Beauchamp from now until the end of time. But dinna come crying tae me when she breaks yer heart."

Jamie rolled his eyes at his sister but chose not to take her bait again. Instead he got to work, pulling mixing bowls and a frying pan out of the cabinet and plugging in the old electric griddle. He threw the sausages in the pan and got to work on the pancakes.

By the time he was finished, most of the household had gotten up and started filling their plates with breakfast. Seeing the food quickly dwindling, he made a plate for Claire and set it aside.

"Where is Claire this morning?" Brian asked as he poured syrup on his pancakes.

"Still sleepin' I guess. She likes a good lie in."

Jenny made a sound low in her throat and Jamie threw her a dirty look. In response, she put her hand to the corner of her mouth and moved it across slowly to the other side. He rolled his eyes at her, poured a mug of coffee, and grabbed the plate he had made for Claire, including two small dishes of butter and syrup, before slipping away.

***

That evening, wee Jamie was practically levitating with excitement. They had spent the day making Christmas cookies, listening to Christmas music, and eating candy canes and Claire was fairly certain the little boy had eaten his weight in them.

Jamie had rented _Home Alone_ , and the whole family gathered to watch it. Wee Jamie curled up on the sofa between Jamie and Claire. He had bestowed Claire with a Santa hat earlier in the day and she wore it proudly. Jamie reached his hand across the back of the couch and played with the hair that was peeking out from under the hat.

There was a knock at the door and Claire looked over at Jamie, furrowing her brows in question, but the minute she saw the crooked smile on his face and the twinkle in his eyes, she knew that he was not surprised about the visitor’s arrival.

Brian was already on his feet, the same look on his face as Jamie’s. “Och!” he declared in mock surprise. “Who could that be at this hour on Christmas Eve? Wee Jamie, why dinna ye help yer grandda answer the door?”

Just then, the sound of bells rang from outside the door and wee Jamie scrambled off the couch. “It’s Santa!” he exclaimed, running past Brian and to the door.

Claire exchanged a smile with Jamie. “You didn’t tell me Santa was coming,” she whispered.

“I didna know! How would I know that Santa was coming?” He made a gesture with his eyes that Claire assumed was supposed to be a wink but looked more like an owl blinking.

Claire laughed and leaned over to give him a quick kiss. “You are a ridiculous human being!”

He stood up and reached over to help her stand. Wee Jamie had just managed to get the door open, and if Claire hadn’t been surprised enough by the arrival of Santa, then the arrival of this particular Santa certainly sufficed. The man was shorter than Claire and not at all round, as one would expect of Santa. He wore a red suit and hat, but his grey beard and hair were his own, rather than wigs. Claire gave Jamie another incredulous look, but he just continued to smile at her.

“Come in, Santa!” Brian bellowed. “Come in out o’ the cold!”

Santa entered the house while Brian set up a chair for him near the tree. Santa sat, and finally spoke, “Weel, is there a young lad here who’d like to tell Santa what he wants for Christmas?” His Scottish accent was more pronounced than Jamie’s.

“Me! Me!” Wee Jamie exclaimed. Wasting no time, he jumped directly in Santa’s lap with a running leap. Santa emitted an “Oomph” sound, but Wee Jamie was already rattling off his Christmas list.

Claire pulled Jamie aside. “Who is it?” she whispered. “You look just as excited as your nephew!”

He pulled her in for a hug and planted a small kiss on the top of her head. “It’s my godfather Murtagh. He came from Scotland. I havena seen in him since I fostered with him there when I was sixteen.”

“Why didn’t you tell me he was coming?”

“Ye told me that ye never had Santa show up at yer house when you were a wee lass. I wanted to see the look on yer face the first time it happened.”

Her face went slack and she bit her lip to stop it from trembling. Taking him in her arms, she whispered. “That was very, very thoughtful of you. Thank you.”

He nipped at her ear and whispered back, “Will ye thank me for it later then?”

“Do you want me to sit on your lap later?”

“Aye, and on my face too.”

“Jamie!” she hissed.

“Dinna tell me that the girl that did what ye did tae me in my car is suddenly shy about me returning the favor!”

“I’m not shy about _that!_ It’s just that your family is _right there._ ”

“Well I didna say to do it now!” She laughed and turned away from him, but he gathered her in his arms, and she leaned into him. “Ye make me so happy, _mo chridhe_ ,” he whispered into her ear.

She turned her head to look at him and he gave her a kiss. “This is the best Christmas I’ve ever had. Thank you, Jamie.”

***

It was well after midnight when everybody was ready for bed. Jamie insisted that everyone get to sleep; he and Claire would take care of bringing the presents down from the attic.

As soon as they heard all the doors closing upstairs for the night Claire turned to Jamie. "Alright, let's get the presents."

"Oh, not yet, _mo chridhe._ First, I need to open my gift." He grabbed her by the ass with both hands and pulled her close.

"And what makes you think you're getting a gift this year?" she asked, resting her hands on his belt buckle.

"I've been a verra, verra good lad." He ducked his head and started sucking on her neck.

"Oh, have you then?" she panted, slowly unbuckling his belt. "Then I guess we'll have to make sure you get everything you want."

"Everything?" he asked, pulling away from her, raising one of his eyebrows. "That's a tall order, Sassenach."

"Let's see if we can get started, then. There's not much time before Santa gets here." She pulled the buckle loose and unzipped his pants, pushing them down.

In seconds he had her on the floor next to the Christmas tree, pulling her clothes off as he went. " _Ah dhia_ , yer sae bonny."

She pulled his shirt over his head and he reached down between her legs. Her hips arched at his touch and she opened her mouth, about to cry out. Jamie muffled her with his mouth, tasting her. _Sugar cookies, candy canes, and eggnog_. When he pulled his mouth away, he told her, "Ye have to be quiet, _a nighean_ , or ye'll wake the whole house with yer wee noises."

"I do not make wee noises!" she protested as his mouth found her nipple, one hand still working at her clit. She let out another moan and then admitted, "OK maybe I do, but you do, too." To demonstrate, she reached down and cupped his balls, squeezing.

" _Iffrin!_ "

"Now who makes wee noises, hmmm?"

"Yer gonna get what ye deserve!" he growled, removing his hand and hammering into her.

She gasped and gripped his ass, pushing him deeper and deeper as he thrust. He placed his mouth on hers again, stifling both their noises.

Her hips rose to meet him again and again, creating friction where she needed it. One of his hands was on her nipple, groping and pinching. He was plunging inside her but it wasn't enough. She lifted one leg and placed it over his shoulder. The effect was instantaneous; his thrusts went deeper, hitting that secret bundle of nerves inside that sent her head spinning.

"Oh god, Jamie. I'm almost there."

He growled and picked up his pace. "Wait for me Claire, wait for me."

"Jamie, I can't wait...I can't…I'm…" Her body convulsed under him as he spilled his seed inside of her. She saw blobs of light in the corners of her vision before it went black, the room spinning around her as his cock pulsed inside her, squeezed by her own contractions.

When she could see again, Jamie was laying on top of her, his auburn curls damp and wild, splayed across her chest. He was still panting, and they were both slick with sweat. She absent-mindedly brought her hands down on his curls and ran her fingers through them. "Are you alive?" she whispered.

"I dinna ken. But what a way tae go!"

She laughed and bent her head to kiss the top of his. "You're amazing. Do you know that? Not just at _this_." She pulled his head up with her hands, so they were eye to eye. "You're everything I never knew I wanted."

***

"Uncle Jamie! Wake up! Santa came!"

Jamie groaned, reached his arm out, and groped at the nightstand to find the alarm clock. 5 AM. He heard the padding of his nephew's feet as they ran past the guest room, further down the hall. A door creaked open and then the lad yelled, "Ma! Uncle Jamie's gone!"

A second set of feet, slow moving, and then Jenny's voice. "He's no' gone. Ye run downstairs and open yer stocking with yer Da and I'll find him." When the small footsteps descended down the stairs, Jenny opened the guest room door. "Get up the two of ye and put some clothes on. I canna hold him off very long."

Claire started at the intrusion on her sleep as Jenny slammed the door. She rubbed her face with her hand and mumbled, "And Merry Christmas to you, too, Jenny."

Jamie was already out of bed and pulling his clothes on. "I'll head down and make ye some coffee." He bent and kissed her on the forehead. "Dinna linger, _mo nighean donn._ " She gave him a lazy salute as he headed out the door and downstairs.

Wee Jamie was on the couch with Ian, happily sorting through the goodies in his stocking. Jamie gave his hair a light tousle as he walked by on the way to the kitchen. Jenny was already there, fussing with the coffee maker, and Jamie sneaked up behind her and gave her a hug. "Happy Christmas, _a piuthar_."

Jenny clucked at him and wiggled out of his embrace. "And why are ye so happy this morning, _a bràthair_?"

"Jesus, Janet. Canna I be happy on Christmas morning? I swear ye could take the happiest occasion on earth and turn it into a funeral."

She turned on him, but her face softened when she saw the hurt in his eyes. "Och, I'm sorry, _a bràthair_. It's just early, and yer just so damn chipper." She reached out her arms and he embraced her again, this time with great difficulty owing to the size of her pregnant belly.

"Dinna fash. I ken yer feeling miserable; ye must no' be sleeping well."

"Ye forgive me too easily, Jamie. I've been a right bitch, and I ken it. I dinna ken what I did to deserve being surrounded by all ye lads who put up with me."

He kissed her on the head and replied, "Mebbe, if the spirit moves ye today, you could find it in yer heart to be nice to Claire." She made a noise deep in her throat, which he couldn't tell if it was agreement or disapproval, but since she didn't go off on a rant, he figured he'd take it as a win.

By the time Claire made her way down the stairs, wee Jamie had already started opening his presents. Her hair was a wild mass despite her efforts to tame it with a scrunchie. Jamie patted the seat next to him and she sat down with him as he handed her a mug of coffee. "Happy Christmas, Sassenach. Ye look bonny in those flannel pajamas."

She rolled her eyes at him but placed a kiss on his cheek before curling up and resting her head on his shoulder.

When Wee Jamie had finally opened every last one of his presents, the adults began to exchange gifts. Claire got up and walked over to the tree, returning with two neatly wrapped gifts. "Happy Christmas," she said to Jamie, placing one of the gifts in his lap.

He smiled at her and opened the gift slowly. "A discman! Claire, that's too expensive. You shouldna have!"

She dismissed his protests with a wave. "With all the time you spend on the train, I figured it was worth the investment. Here," she said, handing him the second gift. "This goes with it."

He ripped the paper open, expecting some new music to listen to, but instead he saw that the CD label read _Introduction to Farsi._ "Claire," he almost choked on his words. "Ye remembered I said I wanted to learn this." She nodded and he kissed her on the cheek. "This is so thoughtful, _mo chridhe_. Thank ye sae much."

"You're welcome."

"Now, I have something for ye, too, but ye'll have tae come down by the tree for it, since it's a little heavy." She gave him a questioning look but followed him to the tree, sitting on the floor as he pulled the gift out.

"What could this be?" she wondered aloud, already ripping at the wrapping paper. "A record player!" she squealed. "Oh, Jamie it's perfect! Thank you." She reached over and embraced him. "Thank you so much."

Her squeal had drawn the attention of the adults in the room. "Weel," he said shyly, "it's no' brand new. I bought it at the thrift shop by your apartment. But it works! Da and I tried it out before I wrapped it."

"I love it," she said firmly. "Now we'll have to go through the records there when we get home."

"I did buy ye one record, Sassenach," he said, handing her a square, flat gift.

She smiled broadly and took it from his hands. She ripped the paper open gleefully and then stopped when she saw the album cover. Her hands began trembling and Jamie could see tears welling up in her eyes. Slowly she pulled off the last bit of paper and stared at the record in her hands. _Queen II._

She was quiet for so long, tears dripping down her cheeks, that Jamie began to worry he had done the wrong thing. He moved closer to her, placing a hand on hers. "I'm sorry, _mo graidhe._ I thought ye would like it. I -"

She looked up at him and cut him off. "Jamie, I love it. I can't believe you remembered. This means everything to me."

"Do ye mean it? Yer not just saying that?"

"I love it, Jamie. And I love _you_." Oblivious to the fact that everyone in the room was watching them, she pulled his face to hers for a kiss, pulling away only when Wee Jamie declared them "disgusting".

Laughing, Jamie rested his forehead on Claire’s and whispered back, "I love you, too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those that don't remember, in an earlier chapter, Claire told Jamie that one of her last memories of her father was of them buying the album Queen II and listening to it together on his record player. 
> 
> Links to my other fics  
> [Clans of Anarchy](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24904606/chapters/60264403) \- An Outlander/Sons of Anarchy crossover in which Jamie Fraser struggles to reconcile the life of crime he lives with the life he truly wants with, Claire, the love of his life
> 
> [Prodigal Son](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24395800/chapters/58847287) \- A canon divergent Outlander story that begins in the year 1979
> 
> Follow me on twitter - @sassenach7471


	13. Isn't She Lovely

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As soon as they got to the hospital, Claire rushed to a pay phone to call Lallybroch. Hands shaking, she put the quarters in the slot and dialed the number. Busy. "Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ!" She slammed the receiver down and retrieved the quarters. She slipped them in the slot again and dialed. Busy. "Fuuuuuucccckkkk," she yelled into the receiver before slamming it down again.

[ ](https://ibb.co/4PmPwbg)

The morning after Christmas, Claire woke up to the sound of the vacuum cleaner running, clunking against the guest room door. "What the bloody hell?" she mumbled, getting out of the bed and opening the door. "Jenny! Jenny!" Jenny didn't turn around, so Claire walked up behind her and tapped her on the shoulder.

"Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!" she spun around to face Claire, clutching at her chest, yelling over the roar of the vacuum cleaner. "Claire! Ye scairt me half to death. Since yer up, though, do ye mind if I vacuum the guest room?"

Rolling her eyes, Claire gestured to the door. "Be my guest."

Jenny entered the room and Claire could see Jamie spring out of bed as if the intruder were a robber and not his sister. He was crouching on the floor, his hair sticking up wildly about his head, pupils dilated. He was completely naked.

"Janet, what the fuck are you doing?”

Jenny stopped her vacuuming and Claire braced herself for the fury, but Jenny surprised her by breaking into hysterical laughter. It was contagious and soon Claire was in the room, too, clutching her stomach as she tried to catch her breath. Jenny reached out a hand and put it on Claire’s arm to steady herself, her other hand wiping tears from her eyes.

Claire snorted, gasping between laughter as she spoke. "You look like…. like a... bloody porcupine."

"I'm glad ye both think this is funny," Jamie growled as he fumbled for his underwear and pajama pants. "What do ye think yer doing, barging in here scaring a man half to death?" His rantings slipped into Gaelic as he tried to get his underwear on, falling over in the process. Claire and Jenny lost themselves entirely, then, until Jenny dragged Claire out of the room.

"We'd better leave him for a bit," she gasped, shutting the door behind them.

"Well," Claire said. "Since I'm up, I suppose I'll go down and have some breakfast. Can I get you anything?"

"Och, no. I've got tae finish cleaning up here. Save some coffee for me though, aye?"

***

A few hours later, Jenny had finished cleaning the house from top to bottom. It was a cold morning; the wind blew hard enough to rattle the windows. Claire and Jamie were curled up under a blanket in the living room talking with Ian. Jenny was pacing the house like a cat in heat.

"Jenny, will ye no' sit down and relax, _mo chridhe_?" Ian pleaded with her.

"I canna sit. I feel like I need tae crawl out o' my own skin today," she spat back. "I need tae get o' of this house, is what I need."

"It's too cold for a walk," Claire said. "That wind is nasty."

Jamie kissed her on her nose. "I love the way ye say _nasty_ , Sassenach. Say it again for me."

She pinched his leg under the blanket. "No, you bloody Scot."

Jenny rolled her eyes at them but said nothing. She continued her pacing for a while and then stopped. "I'm going tae the mall," she announced.

"The mall?" Ian asked incredulously. He looked at her belly fit to burst and shook his head. "No, Janet. Ye canna be traipsing off tae the mall in yer condition."

She snorted. "And I'd like tae see ye stop me, Ian Murray. There'll be some good sales and it'll get me out o' the house."

"Janet, I willna have ye going that far by yerself!"

Jamie looked at Claire and before she could open her mouth to protest, Jamie volunteered, "Claire can go wi' ye." Claire gave him a _look_ that could have turned lesser men to stone, but Jamie went on. “Ye can make it a girls’ day.”

The thought of spending a “girls’ day” with Jenny sounded as appealing to Claire as spending a day having her toenails ripped out one by one, but Jamie had painted her into a corner. She would either have to come up with a _wild_ excuse or suck it up and go.

“A girls’ day sounds wonderful!” she said with a strained smile.

***

Claire wondered if the day would ever end. She and Jenny had been at the mall for two hours and Jenny was showing no signs of slowing down. All Claire wanted to do was to get back in the car and drive back to Lallybroch to be with Jamie.

The car ride had been miserable. The mall Jenny had insisted on going to was nearly an hour’s drive from Lallybroch, and Claire had to drive because Jenny could barely fit behind the steering wheel anymore.

The wind had whipped mercilessly, causing the car to shake. Every time Claire forgot to use her blinker or had to stop too short or rolled through a stop sign, Jenny had made one of her Scottish noises in her throat, irritating Claire. Claire had wanted the heat on high; Jenny had wanted it off. Claire had wanted the music on; Jenny had wanted silence.

She had been following Jenny around from store to store. Jenny, it turned out, was a keen bargain shopper and would spend ages combing through clearance racks looking for the best deals. Once she had found a few prized items, she would proceed to the checkout counter where she would argue endlessly with the cashiers about using expired coupons and requesting discounts for blemishes in the clothing that could barely be seen by the naked eye. For her part, Claire would smile apologetically at the cashiers while wanting to crawl under the clothing racks in embarrassment.

So, it had gone on for two long hours, when Jenny stopped suddenly, grabbed Claire's arm, and almost doubled over. "Jesus Jenny, are you alright?" Claire asked.

"Oh, just a little contraction. I'm sure it's just Braxton-Hicks. Wee Jamie was two weeks late, so dinna think this bairn is in any hurry to arrive, either."

"Are you sure?" Claire asked nervously. "Maybe we should go home."

"I'm _fine_ , Cla-." She stopped, cut off by another contraction. Claire looked down and saw a small puddle of water at Jenny's feet.

"Oh shit!" Claire exclaimed, "Jenny, we need to get you to the hospital!"

"Dinna fash! It's fine. Here, I've some napkins in my purse to -" she groaned again, her fingers turning white as they pressed into Claire's arm.

A small crowd was starting to form around them, and Claire leaned down to get close to Jenny's face. "Jenny," she hissed. "You are in labor and it's happening really fast. Now, I'm going to get somebody to call an ambulance." Jenny opened her mouth to protest, but Claire cut her off. "Do not even try to argue with me."

Thankfully an older woman, who introduced herself as Mrs Graham, approached them and asked if they needed help. Claire instructed her to find a security guard or call an ambulance.

Unable to handle the onslaught of contractions while on her feet anymore, Jenny had slid down to the floor on her knees. Claire crouched down next to her and gripped her hand. "It's ok, Jenny," she murmured to her. "Just keep breathing; it's ok." Jenny gripped onto her hand so tightly, Claire feared she might break her fingers.

It felt like ages before the ambulance arrived. Nervously, Claire asked the paramedic what hospital they were taking her to and told Jenny she would follow in the car. Jenny, laid out on a stretcher by then, ready to be wheeled away, reached out and gripped Claire’s arm vehemently. "No! Claire, dinna leave me."

Claire looked at Jenny's frightened eyes and grabbed her hand. "OK, I won't."

***

As soon as they got to the hospital, Claire rushed to a pay phone to call Lallybroch. Hands shaking, she put the quarters in the slot and dialed the number. _Busy_. "Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ!" She slammed the receiver down and retrieved the quarters. She slipped them in the slot again and dialed. _Busy_. "Fuuuuuucccckkkk," she yelled into the receiver before slamming it down again.

Several people had turned to stare at her, and she pushed her hair back from her face, trying to muster the last of her dignity. She retrieved the quarters again and raced back down the hallway to Jenny's room. Jenny was on the bed, groaning with a contraction while a nurse tried to place an IV. "If you could please stop moving," the nurse said, taking a firm hold of Jenny's arm.

Jenny ripped her arm away from the nurse. "How about I punch ye in the stomach repeatedly and ye try to keep _yer_ arm still?"

"Jenny," Claire interrupted, "I keep getting a busy signal. What's Ian's father's number?

"Make yerself useful and get me a pen and paper," Jenny demanded of the nurse. "Well, dinna stand there wi' yer mouth open. She's tryin tae get ahold of my husband." She groaned with another contraction while the nurse fumbled in her pocket for a pen and small notebook. When the contraction passed, Jenny scribbled the number on the paper and handed it to Claire.

Claire raced back down the hall and tried the number to Lallybroch again. _Busy_. She tried John Murray's number. _Busy_. Over and over she got a busy signal. Frantic and frustrated, she slammed the receiver down and raced back to Jenny's room.

The nurse had managed to get the IV in, by the time she returned, and Jenny was in the throes of another contraction. When it was over, the nurse asked, "How was that?"

Jenny's face turned beet red. "How do ye think it is, ye cow? If yer no' going tae be helpful, get the hell out!"

The nurse scurried out and Claire tentatively approached the bed. "Are they coming, Claire?" Jenny asked hopefully.

Claire shook her head, "There must be something wrong with the phone lines. I just keep getting a busy signal."

"Damn wind must hae knocked down the phone lines again." She was hit with another contraction and Claire instinctively reached down and rubbed her back. "It's too late, Claire," Jenny groaned. "They'll never make it in time. This bairn isna going tae wait."

***

Several hours later the baby still hadn't come, though Jenny's contractions were relentless. Claire stepped out of the room to try her phone calls again while the doctors checked Jenny. Both phone lines were still down.

_Surely_ Jamie and Ian would start to worry about them soon, Claire thought. But what then? They would have no idea where to even begin looking. Claire walked back to the room to find Jenny panicked and screaming at the doctor. "No! Ye'll no' cut me open!'

Claire rushed in. "Jenny, what's wrong?"

The doctor, an older gentleman with white hair and thick glasses, interjected, before Jenny could answer. “Mrs. Murray’s baby is breech. We’re going to do a c-section.”

“No, I told ye already yer not!” Jenny yelled. She looked desperately at Claire. “I dinna want surgery, Claire. I dinna need it.”

Claire looked from Jenny to the doctor, and then to the machine next to Jenny’s bed, monitoring the baby’s vitals. She watched the machine carefully, looking for anything that looked abnormal. Once satisfied, she turned to the doctor, straightening herself to her full height. “Doctor Raymond, is the baby in any immediate danger?”

“Who are you and why are you butting your nose into this, missy?” The doctor sneered at her. “The delivery room is for _family only._ ”

“She’s my sister-in-law,” Jenny chimed in, causing Claire’s jaw to drop. “She stays as long as my husband canna be here!” She gave Claire a conspiratorial look, and Claire gave her a slight nod of understanding.

“That’s right. I _am_ family, and I asked a question which I would like you to answer,” Claire said, throwing her head back haughtily. _Fake it til you make it, Beauchamp_ , she thought to herself. The doctor looked down at Claire, staring at her, trying to get her to break. She stood her ground, locking eyes with him, and not daring to look away.

Finally, he sighed loudly and looked at the machines, glancing at the chart. “No, there’s no immediate danger to the baby or Mrs. Murray at this time.”

“Then there’s no reason to rush her to surgery.” Claire replied.

The doctor wagged his finger in Claire’s face. “Listen to me; I don’t know who you think you are, but I would bet you haven’t delivered nearly as many babies as I have. Now, Mrs. Murray can have the c-section now and get it over with, or she can go through hours of very painful labor until she is exhausted and unable to push and _then_ get the c-section.”

Claire looked past his finger, resisting the urge to grab it and twist it. “We’ll take option two.”

“Fine then. Fine,” the doctor muttered, fumbling with the chart. He looked from Claire to Jenny, opened his mouth to say something, thought better of it, and turned to walk about the door.

Claire sat on the edge of the bed while Jenny bent forward with another contraction. When it was over, she looked at Claire and said, “Thank ye, Claire.”

Claire nodded. “Jenny, if anything changes on that monitor, I’m telling the doctor to take you for the c-section.”

“I ken, Claire, I ken. But these old coots think they can just boss women around and tell us what to do just because it’s more convenient for them; I’m no’ going to be cut open just so that my doctor doesna have to stay late.” She crossed her arms over her chest defiantly.

“I’ve got you, Jenny.” Claire told her. She glanced out the window nervously. It was already getting dark; Jamie and Ian must be worried sick. “I’m going to go down the hall and try to call again.” Jenny nodded at her as she was overtaken by another contraction.

When she heard the busy signal again, she put the receiver down and rested her head against the pay phone. She took a deep breath and steeled herself to go back and see Jenny through the childbirth.

The contractions came harder and faster. Claire brought Jenny cold washcloths, fed her ice chips, provided her counter-pressure on her back, and let Jenny grip her hand so hard that she worried she would never regain feeling in it. Finally, after an hour of contractions that seemed to begin before the last one had ended, Jenny began grunting and bearing down.

The nurse and the doctor came in, and suddenly everything was happening very fast. Bright lights were turned on, equipment was brought in, and Jenny’s legs were thrown into stirrups that looked more like medieval torture devices. Claire stayed up by Jenny’s head, holding her hand. Doctor Raymond had left and was replaced by a younger female doctor who coached Jenny through the difficult pushing involved with a breech presentation. The pushing seemed to go on and on; Claire could hardly believe Jenny was still managing it, let alone conscious.

Finally, Jenny rallied for a final push and Claire looked down as the doctor helped guide the baby, buttocks first, into the world. "It's a girl!" the doctor declared. The small baby began screaming immediately, and Jenny fell back on the support of the bed, exhaling the greatest sigh Claire had ever heard.

The room was abuzz with activity as the nurses checked over the baby and Jenny. Claire was feeling very much in the way and not sure what to do with herself when one of the nurses thrust the baby into her arms. "Her Auntie. Hold your niece while we finish up with mom."

Claire stood stunned, holding the baby away from her body for a moment. She had never held a baby, let alone a newborn, in her life. She looked around the room nervously for help but found that nobody was paying any attention to her. Just then, the baby puckered up her face and gave a small sneeze. Claire laughed and pulled her in close, giving her a small _boop_ on the nose. "Bless you, darling," she said, looking into her eyes. Then she gasped, realizing that she was looking at the Fraser cat-eyes. A small tear dripped down her face and she brushed it away, thinking herself foolish. She started cooing and talking to the little girl until she heard Jenny's voice say, "Claire, if yer done with yer conversation, I'd like to hold my new bairn."

She looked up and saw Jenny's face beaming. "Here’s your wee lass," she said, handing the bundle over to her mother. Jenny did some adjusting and soon had the baby suckling at her breast.

"How do you do that?" Claire asked, in awe.

"It's no' so hard, once ye get the hang of it. Claire, sit down; ye look like yer dead on yer feet." She hadn't noticed how tired she was until Jenny said something, but she gladly relaxed into the reclining chair next to Jenny's bed. "Ye looked good with a bairn in yer arms."

Claire blushed, and admitted it was the first time she'd ever held a baby. Jenny just gave her a quizzical look and laughed. "What are you going to name her?" Claire asked.

"We picked Margaret Ellen for a girl."

"Little Maggie," Claire said. "It suits her."

"And Ellen. For my ma."

Claire nodded. "Jamie's told me all about her." She paused and reached out a hand to touch Jenny's arm. "You know I'm not trying to replace your mother or you in Jamie’s life, right?"

"Dinna fash, Claire. I think ye proved today that ye'll do just fine for my brother." She looked at Maggie and continued. "Didn't yer Auntie do a wonderful job, my wee lass?" Claire really did tear up then, and she excused herself to go try the pay phones again.

She placed the quarters in and dialed again, expecting to hear a busy signal. Instead, she heard a brief _ring_ and then Brian's voice. "Hello?"

"Brian, it's Claire. Everything's alright."

"It's Claire," he yelled. "Claire, we've been worrit sick. Where are ye?"

She gave him the name of the hospital and assured him again that everything was fine. Jamie took the phone then. "Sassenach."

"Hi. Everything's ok, Jamie. Your niece is here."

"Oh, thank Christ! We were ready tae send out the cavalry for ye."

"Hurry up and get here, Jamie. I miss you."

"I miss ye, too, _mo nighean donn._ I'll see ye soon. I love ye."

Claire laughed; the new words they were still getting accustomed to saying to each other filling her with unflagging joy. "I love you, too. I'll see you soon."

When she got back to the room, Jenny was sitting up eating. Maggie was lying in a bassinet next to the bed, and Claire walked over to her. "Do you mind if I hold her for a bit?"

"Of course not! Have a wee cuddle with her in the chair."

Claire picked her up and looked in her eyes again. _My niece_ , she thought. She pulled her in close and brought her over to the chair. When she was comfortable, she bent her head down to give the baby a small kiss. The smell of the top of her head was intoxicating and she reclined back with Maggie bundled up on her chest.

***

"Claire…. Claire…"

Claire opened her eyes and saw Jamie standing over her, gently shaking her foot. He had a giant teddy bear slung over his shoulder and a giant bouquet of balloons was floating above his head.

"Hey you," she whispered. Maggie was still fast asleep on her chest. Jamie leaned down and placed a kiss on the baby’s head before kissing Claire. "I see where I am in the hierarchy now." She saw Ian standing behind Jamie and smiled at him. "Would you like to meet your daughter?"

Ian beamed and took the bundle from Claire's arms. Brian gently clapped him on the back and said, "Bonny!" His voice was choked up, and Claire could see a glimmer of a tear in his eye. Jenny, exhausted by the long day, was out cold.

Jamie lifted Claire from the chair only to sit down in it and pull her down in his lap. He pulled her in close to his chest and kissed the top of her head. "I was so worried about ye, Sassenach. I ken ye have a knack for getting yerself intae trouble."

She snuggled into his chest. "I knew you'd be worried. I'm sorry."

"What do ye have tae be sorry for? Ye couldna help that our phone lines went down. And it looks like ye did a braw job helping Jenny." He brought his head down close to hers and whispered even more quietly. "When I came into this room and saw ye sleeping wi' that wee bairn on yer chest, my heart stopped for a moment. I ken it's much too soon for us tae be thinking about bairns, so ye dinna have to say it. Just…. seein ye that way made me feel like I was takin a wee keek into our future. If that's what ye want, someday."

In response, she took his head in her hands and brought his lips to hers, and that was all the answer he needed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much as always to @charmingdearie, who made the mood board, and @alienoutlander, my lovely beta!


	14. Anthem

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What about you, John? Is ‘adequate’ enough for you?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to JRC10.

[ ](https://ibb.co/rG2JYFY)

**_December 30, 1991_ **

Claire awoke in the early hours of the morning, reaching out instinctually for Jamie. He wasn’t there, and when he didn’t return to the bed after five minutes, she slipped out from under the covers and went looking for him. In the upstairs hallway she paused, hearing a low rumbling voice coming from downstairs.

She tiptoed halfway down the stairs and peered around the corner into the living room. Jamie sat on the couch wrapped in a blanket, his knees pulled up, with baby Maggie resting on top of his thighs. He had loosened her swaddle and was periodically kissing her fingers and toes as he murmured to her in what Claire was fairly certain was Gaelic. She sat on the stairs to watch him; he looked so incredibly peaceful with her, Claire didn't dare interrupt him.

She felt a hand on her shoulder and looked behind her. Jenny gave her a small smile and whispered, "The bairn couldna sleep, and neither could Jamie, so he offered to spend some time with her. I'll take sleep any time I can get it!"

"It looks like they're having a very deep conversation," Claire joked.

Jenny smiled again and said, "I wouldna doubt it if they were. Ye can talk to a bairn like ye canna talk to anyone else. They listen to ye but they willna laugh if ye sound foolish or tell yer secrets."

"What do you think he’s telling her?" Claire asked.

"Oh, if I had to guess, it probably has something to do with the lass he's in love wi'," Jenny teased.

Claire blushed at that and stood up. "Well, I guess I'll leave them to their secrets."

Jenny nodded and followed her back up the stairs.

***

"Are ye sure ye canna stay for Hogmanay?" Brian Fraser asked for the millionth time that day. Jamie and Claire stood at the front door with their coats on, suitcases already packed in the car, and he was _still_ trying to convince them to stay.

Claire gave him a big hug, _again,_ and explained, "We really, really can't. We are having friends over tomorrow night for the New Year. Thank you so much for having me."

"Och," he said quietly. "There's no reason tae thank me. Thank _you_ fer taking care of my son. I dinna think I've ever seen him so happy."

Claire fought back tears as she pulled away and gave hugs to everyone else. Jenny gave her a particularly long hug and made Claire promise to call her at least once a week.

As soon as they hit the road they began making plans for their party the next day. "Are Rupert and Angus definitely coming?" Claire asked.

"Aye, both of em. Do ye think one of them might be a match for wee Mary?" Jamie teased.

"Dear God," Claire laughed. "Can you imagine?"

"And what about Gillian? Is she bringing a date?"

"I don't know. I haven't talked to her since before we left. A lot can change with Gillian in ten days."

"Aye, I guess we'll have to be surprised. And are Isobel and John coming?'

"Of course."

Jamie made one of his Scottish sounds in the back of his throat.

"What?" Claire asked. "Out with it."

"It's nothing I havena told ye before. There's just something off about that relationship and I dinna like it."

"Well," Claire said, snuggling into Jamie, "I suppose you can put on your detective hat at the party and see if you can figure it out."

***

By eleven o'clock the following evening, the party was in full swing and Jamie was, in fact, keeping a close eye on John and Isobel. Claire shook her head lovingly as she watched him hanging around the two of them like a puppy. If she didn't know Jamie better, she would have been wildly jealous.

As it was, she had enough to deal with, staving off Angus's attention. She had met him once before when both of Jamie’s roommates had met them out at a club one Saturday night, but he hadn't been quite as attentive to Claire that night. Apparently, the whisky Jamie had brought back from Lallybroch had fortified Angus's confidence. When he wasn't trying to dance with Claire in the tiny living room, he was waiting on her hand and foot. It had been flattering and a little sweet at first, but her patience was wearing thin.

She tried to get Jamie's attention, but before she could reach him to drag him away from his secret mission, Gillian grabbed her and pulled her aside. She was dressed in a tiny black dress and a humongous fur coat that she must have been roasting in. "Tell me what you know about Rupert," she whispered very loudly.

"Well, he's a theater major and he's Jamie's roommate," Claire answered with a shrug. "You aren't seriously thinking of hooking up with him?"

"Why not? I need someone to kiss at midnight."

Claire laughed, "Best of luck to you then, Gillian. Just keep it to a kiss until the rest of us go to bed, ok?"

Gillian giggled mischievously and gave Claire a kiss on the cheek before walking to the kitchen to continue her flirtation with Rupert. Claire was about to try her hand at getting Jamie's attention again when she noticed that Mary was sitting on the couch by herself.

She went over and sat down next to her. "Are you having fun, Mary?"

Mary nodded. "It's great, Claire. Thank you for inviting me."

"Mary," Claire laughed, "you're one of my best friends. Of course I invited you. I feel bad that you're sitting by yourself, though."

"I don't really mind," she said. Claire noticed then that Mary was not looking at her but rather across the room at Angus.

"I'll be right back," Claire said. She went across the room and grabbed Angus by the arm. She dragged him over to the couch and said, "Mary this is Angus. Angus this is Mary. Why don't you two chat while I see about the, uh, drinks."

 _Well that killed two birds with one stone_ , she thought. She turned to where Jamie had been standing a few minutes before, but only Isobel was there. "Have you seen Jamie?"

"I think he went to the bathroom."

Hoping to corner Jamie for a little attention, Claire excused herself and went off in search of Jamie. As she came to the end of the hallway, though, she heard John's voice and paused.

_You've been all over me all night. What do you mean I have the wrong idea?_

_I'm sorry I gave ye the wrong impression. Look, let's go back to the party and forget about this, ok? Ye dinna have to be embarrassed._

_Why would I be embarrassed? You're the one sending mixed signals._

_Yer drunk, man. Hold yer wheesht before ye say something ye regret._

_Just leave me alone, Jamie._

Claire turned around and quickly crept back to the living room. Jamie joined her soon after, looking flustered. He pulled Claire close and kissed the top of her head.

"It's almost time everyone!" Gillian yelled from the kitchen.

Claire turned on the TV so they could watch the ball drop, commenting, "God, Dick Clark never ages."

Jamie came up behind her, looping both arms around her and squeezing her tight. "I canna wait tae start a new year with you, _mo ghraidh._ "

Out of the corner of her eye, Claire saw a very drunk John walk back into the living room, joining Isobel.

"SHHHHHHH!!!" Gillian shouted. "We're missing the countdown!"

They all counted along together, “Five, four, three, two, one! Happy New Year!"

Claire turned around and pulled Jamie's face to hers. She kissed him deeply and then whispered, "Happy New Year, my love."

***

That night in bed, neither Claire nor Jamie could sleep, despite their drunken exhaustion. Jamie was tense, unable to relax, and Claire could tell he wanted to talk to her about what had happened earlier that evening. Realizing that they wouldn’t get any sleep before he got it off his chest, Claire sighed and asked, “Jamie, what happened earlier tonight?”

She was curled up next to him, using his broad chest as a pillow. He absent-mindedly stroked her hair. “Ye heard that?” he finally asked.

“I went to look for you, and I couldn’t help but overhear. Jamie, did he… hit on you?”

“Aye. He cornered me in the hallway by the bathroom and tried to kiss me. He said he thought I was interested because I was spending so much time wi’ him and Isobel.”

Claire had to chuckle a little at that. “I guess your detective work didn’t go as well as you thought it would.”

Jamie shrugged. “Well, I got the information I wanted, anyway.”

“So, what now?”

“I think ye have tae tell Isobel, Sassenach. She canna marry him.”

“What if he likes men _and_ women?” she wondered hopefully. “Maybe Isobel already knows.”

Jamie shook his head. “Mebbe, but ye ken I’ve wondered about his feelings for her even from the start. And even if that’s the case, wouldn’t you want to ken before you married someone?”

“It would be better if John told her himself. Maybe I can talk to him tomorrow.”

“I suppose it’s worth a shot. But if he doesna do it himself, I will. I willna see that sweet woman marry a man who doesna want her. Everyone deserves to be loved by someone who loves them back.”

“I love you, Jamie,” she said. As he held her close to him, she was overcome with the need to show him _how much_ she loved him. Lifting herself up slightly, she bent down and softly kissed the hollow above his collarbone. She smiled to herself as his body shuddered in response.

"Sassenach," he said mischievously, "be a good lass and get yerself undressed.

She smirked at him and went up on her knees, stripping off her t-shirt and pajama pants. She pushed her hair back away from her face and waited for further instruction.

"Mmmmm…." Jamie groaned. "That's verra nice. Now," he said, nudging her knee with his leg, "get yer legs on either side of me." She scooted up the bed and maneuvered herself so she was straddling him. She could feel his erection against her bottom, and she began to rock slowly against it.

"Not yet, _mo chridhe_. I can tell yer half in the bag, and I ken how horny that makes ye, but I'm going to make sure yer good and ready before I take my pleasure from ye. Now, scootch up closer." She slowly inched her way up his body. "Oh god, Claire, I can feel how wet ye are already, but it's no' enough. Not tonight. Tonight I'll have ye dripping before I'm through with ye. Now come up just a wee bit closer."

Claire moaned and did as asked. As soon as her breasts were in reaching distance, he grabbed them with his strong hands and brought one to his mouth. Wasting no time with teasing, he took as much of her in his mouth as he could, sucking and flicking her nipple with his skilled tongue. He alternated back and forth between each of them, sucking and nipping and groaning into them all while his hands massaged and kneaded.

"Oh God, Jamie," she panted, rocking her hips against him, trying to create friction.

"Oh, yer verra greedy, tonight, Sassenach. It's a good thing I'm in a generous mood. Why don't you scootch yerself up some more?"

She looked down. "If I scootch up anymore, I'll be -"

"Aye, exactly."

Needing no further invitation, she reached up with both hands to grab hold of the headboard and moved her knees up so they were on either side of Jamie’s head. Slowly, she lowered herself down until she met his mouth, and his tongue lashed out and began exploring her. He grabbed onto her ass with both his hands and pulled her into his face hard, his tongue doing a frenzied dance on her clit. She moaned at the sensation from this new angle and he paused for a moment to say, "Jesus, Sassenah, dinna forget we have company."

Biting her lip, she thrust herself back into his face. His hands gripped her ass so hard, she knew she would have bruises the next day. The thought of that alone made her moan again as Jamie continued conducting the symphony of her arousal with his mouth.

When he felt her legs begin to quake against his head, he took her clit into his mouth, suckling on it as he had her nipples earlier. He kept a firm grip on her buttocks to hold her in place, showing no mercy. She let go, crying out for the whole house to hear, her sex pulsing against his face. She gripped the headboard for support as he used his tongue in slow, lazy circles to bring her down slowly.

When the vibrations in her body finally ceased, she slowly lowered herself down onto his chest again. She leaned down and took his mouth in hers, tasting herself on his lips and tongue. Grunting, Jamie pushed his boxers down and kicked them off. "Back yerself up, Claire," he ordered.

Teasing his nipples with her tongue as she went, she moved her body until she could feel his erection twitching against her ass. She raised her body slowly, reaching behind and gently fondling his balls. He let out an animal growl and all at once she lowered herself onto him and began riding him hard. He thrust his hips up to meet her as she moaned and bucked on top of him, grinding her mound into his pelvis to create the friction she craved. Her climax came quickly and, as she quivered around him, he lost himself with one final thrust, shooting into her and letting her pulsing muscles milk him dry.

She collapsed on top of him, sweating and panting. He rubbed her back and kissed the top of her head, whispering and murmuring to her in a mix of Gaelic and English, until they both drifted off to sleep.

***

The next morning, Claire woke up and reluctantly got up to assess the amount of clean up that would be needed from the night before. She tip-toed down the hall toward the back of the apartment and quietly opened the door to the guest room/Uncle Lamb’s room when he was there. Gillian and Rupert were passed out in a heap together on the bed and Claire cringed before quietly shutting the door.

In the kitchen, she grabbed a garbage bag from under the sink and began picking up empty cups and items that were strewn around. Mary and Angus were asleep on the couch, each with their head at the different ends. Isobel and John had simply made a bed on the floor with a few blankets and throw pillows. Claire moved near them and gently nudged John with her foot. When he did not move, she nudged him again and quickly stepped away as he began to move.

“Oh, I’m sorry, John, did I wake you?” she asked as she casually straightened her CDs.

“Hrmmmphhh.”

“Well, now that you’re up, would you mind taking this out to the trash bin for me? The key to the alley is behind the door. Thanks!”

John looked around sleepily as Claire ignored him and continued her cleaning. Reluctantly, John pushed himself up and grabbed the garbage bag, glaring at Claire as he put on his shoes and went outside. After a moment, Claire threw on her coat and a pair of old sneakers. She grabbed John’s coat and followed him out. Sitting on the stoop, she waited for him to emerge from the alley on the side of the house.

He squinted his eyes in confusion when he saw Claire sitting there waiting. Claire smiled at him and patted the stoop next to her. He sat down slowly, searching Claire’s face suspiciously for any clues as to what this little sit-down might be about. She handed him his coat and he took it gratefully.

He was no stranger to one of Claire’s chats, nor were any of the rest of their friends. When Claire Beauchamp had it in her mind to say something, she cut right to the chase. She always spoke fairly, without judgment, but she did not mince words about what she wanted to tell you. Frustratingly, she was usually right.

“John. I know what happened last night with Jamie.”

“He told you?” John asked angrily.

“Well, yes, but only after I asked him about it. I heard you, at least the tail end of the conversation.”

John made a “Hmmmphhh,” sound but didn’t raise any further objections.

“I don’t care that you’re…. attracted to Jamie. That’s not what this is about.”

“Well what is about, then?” he asked quietly.

“I’m worried about you. And Isobel. I know this is a very personal thing, but I hope you can trust me enough to tell me whether this is something I need to worry about, in terms of Isobel, I mean.”

“I am a perfectly adequate… fiancé to her in every way, if that’s what you’re asking.”

It was Claire’s turn to make a “Hmmphhh,” sound. “Adequate? Is that what Izzy deserves?”

“I’ve never done, and would never do, anything to hurt her.”

“What about you, John? Is ‘adequate’ enough for you? Do you… _enjoy_ being with her? Do you really want to spend the rest of your life with her?”

“Well, I don’t see that I really have any other options.”

“No other options? John, it’s 1992! Nobody would think twice if you _never_ married. And there are plenty of people who would support you if you told them.”

“Like who?”

“Well, me, for one. Jamie for another.”

“Jamie? God, I don’t think I can ever face him again. I’ve humiliated myself.”

“Jamie doesn’t care, John. Trust me.”

“How would I ever tell Isobel, Claire? _She’ll_ be humiliated.”

“Personally, I think she deserves the full truth. You could tell her that you aren’t in love with her anymore, but I think that will hurt worse if she doesn’t know the full story. Either way, she’s going to be hurt, but better she knows that this has nothing to do with her.”

“And then what?”

“Well, I guess that’s up to you. I won’t say anything, and neither will Jamie.”

“I’m so sorry for hitting on your boyfriend, Claire.” Tears welled up in his eyes and he wiped them away with the back of his hand.

“Just forget about it, John. I know he’s irresistible.” She gave him a small smile, hoping to lighten the mood.

He chuckled and sniffed his nose loudly. “It’s not even that. I just, well, I was drunk, you know? And he was spending a lot of time with me and Izzy, and I just thought that maybe he… it was stupid. It’s just that I don’t want you to think I’m _in love_ with the guy or anything, Claire. I just…. god this is dumb…I just see the way he looks at you, and the look of satisfaction you get on your face whenever he’s near you, and I wanted that.”

“John…”

He raised a hand to stop her. “No, let me finish. I _know_ the reason you two look at each other that way is because you two were made for each other. And I never meant to come between that. I think I just…I dunno, Claire. I can’t explain it.”

“You don’t have to. I understand what you’re trying to say, and it’s ok. Don’t let it happen again, though, ok?” she said with a wink. “That Scot is all mine. I’m not going to share him.”

John chuckled and rolled his eyes at her. “I see you two, Claire. And I really am happy for you. You deserve it after all you went through with that asshole, Frank.”

She smiled at him. “You deserve happiness, too, John. You deserve to have that look of satisfaction on your face. Whatever you decide to do next, I’ll be here for you. But you have to break it off with Isobel.”

He nodded, tears forming in his eyes again. “I do love her, you know. Just not…”

Claire leaned over and put an arm around him, pulling him into a hug. “I know.” They sat together for a few minutes until she finally said, “Let’s go inside. I’m freezing my arse off out here.”

***

Later that afternoon, Claire and Jamie were curled up on the couch watching _Spaceballs_. The guests were gone, the apartment was clean, and a pizza was on the way. After spending so much time with Jamie’s family over the holidays, and then jumping right into hosting a party when they returned, Claire was thankful for some alone time with Jamie. She snuggled into him, resting her head on his chest.

Suddenly there was a knock on the door. Claire sat up and gave Jamie a questioning look. He shrugged and she got up to see who was there. She peeked out the curtain and saw John standing on the stoop.

“Come in, come in,” she said, opening the door.

John’s eyes were red-rimmed and puffy. Jamie stood, making room for him on the couch. “Ye look like ye could use a whisky,” he suggested, and John nodded.

Claire sat down on the couch next to John. Jamie handed him a drink and settled into the bowl chair with his own. “What happened?” Claire asked, finally.

“I broke it off with Isobel,” he said, taking a sip of the whisky and grimacing.

“How did it go?” Claire asked gently.

“About how you would expect,” he answered, staring at the floor.

“Did you tell her…everything?” Claire asked.

“Yes. I told her that I’m…” He paused, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. Then he brought his head up and looked Claire in the eye. “I told her that I’m gay.”

Claire leaned over and hugged him with her arms around his shoulders. He leaned her head against hers and smiled. “Thank you, Claire.”

John looked up at Jamie, a mix of shame and fear in his eyes. “Jamie, I – “

Jamie held up a hand, “Don’t. Claire already told me what ye talked about earlier, and ye dinna need to apologize for what happened last night. It’s no’ a big deal.”

“You don’t hate me?” John asked incredulously.

Jamie gave him a strange look and suppressed a laugh. “Hate ye? No, I dinna hate ye. I’d have had more cause tae hate ye if ye hadn’t told Isobel.” He paused, his lip twitching at the corner of his mouth. “If I hated everyone who hit on me, I wouldna have many people left to talk tae.”

Claire rolled her eyes at him, shaking her head. John gave a tentative laugh and then coughed nervously. “There is one other thing…” Claire raised an eyebrow at him. “Isobel threw me out, so I kind of don’t have anywhere to live. Can I crash on your couch for a couple nights, until I find a new place?”

“I can do one better than the couch, John. You can sleep in my Uncle Lamb’s room, in the back of the apartment. It’s not much, but at least you’ll have some privacy. And you can stay as long as you want, even until the end of the semester. There’s probably no point in trying to find an apartment now, with only a few months of school left.”

John’s face relaxed for the first time since he’d arrived. “Claire, I can’t thank you enough. Jamie, are you sure you don’t mind?”

“It’s no’ my apartment,” Jamie said, shrugging, “Ye’ll only have tae put up wi’ me on the weekends. I must tell ye, tho’, that I think she might be a horrible roommate.” Claire gave him a look, but his mouth was twitching uncontrollably. “She doesna keep food in the fridge, she doesna ever wash her dishes, and she leaves enough hair in the shower drain to make a whole new Claire wig wi’ every shower.”

Claire smacked him playfully on the arm. “Don’t listen to him, John. He’s just jealous that you get to spend more time with me than he does. Now, Jamie, why don’t you go back to John’s place with him and help him get his things. I’ll change the sheets in Lamb’s room, God only knows what Rupert and Gillian did on them last night. Then, I need to call Isobel and do some damage control before she hates me forever for harboring the enemy. I may need to go out for emergency drinks later, so I hope you two can find something to do. Perhaps some chess? I think you both play.” She gave Jamie a playful smack on the bottom and set off to take care of her chores.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Anthem](https://youtu.be/c8-BT6y_wYg) by Leonard Cohen


	15. Long Promised Road

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Colum, completely ignoring Claire, pointed his fork at Jamie. "What do ye intend to do wi' yer life then, nephew?"
> 
> "I've got a few things in the works," Jamie replied.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dinna fash about the update to the chapter #s and name, Sassenachs! Part I of Blood Sugar will be ending next week, but Part II, American Pie, will be right around the corner after a brief hiatus.  
> Subscribe to the [Blood Sugar Series](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1878061) for updates when Part II arrives.
> 
> Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who has followed me on this journey so far.

[ ](https://ibb.co/2jGW30r)

John entered the apartment with the last of his things from his old place with Isobel. It had been a little over a week since he'd told her the truth and moved in with Claire. Closing the front door with his foot, he carried the box toward the back of the apartment to his room.

As he passed Claire's room, he heard a loud groaning from Jamie that made him stop in his tracks.

 _Jamie, it's never going to fit in there. It's too big._ She grunted in frustration.

 _It'll fit; I just need tae get the right angle._ A piece of furniture abruptly screeched on the floor.

_Careful! You're going to scratch something._

_Will ye just hold still, woman, and let me do this?_ He groaned again.

_Fine, but if you damage something I'm going to be really pissed._

Another loud screech of furniture was followed by Claire screeching. _Ouch! You pinched me! I told you to be careful!_

_Get yer hands o' of the way then and let me finish this._

Something thumped loudly against the wall and Claire screeched. _You did it! It fit!_

_Aye, I told ye it would. Ye need tae trust me._

_Fine, fine. Can we go get something to eat now?_

Before John could scurry away, Jamie opened the bedroom door. John just stood there, mouth agape, unable to find words or even move.

"Oh hey, John. Yer back," Jamie said, giving him a smile.

"John's here?" Claire asked from inside the room. "Hey John, come here and see what Jamie did.”

He gave Jamie a questioning look, but Jamie just nodded and gestured toward the room. John slowly peeked into the room, cringing with the uncertainty of what he was about to see.

"A new desk!" Claire exclaimed, as he saw the small piece of furniture wedged into the space between Claire’s dresser and bed. "I didn't think we'd get it in here, but Jamie figured it out."

John sighed with relief and began laughing. "What's so funny?" Jamie asked.

John shook his head. "Nothing, nothing. Forget it. It looks great. I just have to go put this box down." He walked back to his room, still laughing at himself.

Classes had started again, which meant Jamie and Claire could fall back into their old routine; they focused on school during the week, with the weekends reserved for spending time together. The only difference was that John had inevitably become an integral part of their lives. With his guard finally let down, Jamie realized he had a lot in common with John. Of course, there were the surface things: they both loved football (soccer, that is), board games, and, strangely enough, _t_ _elenovelas,_ Spanish language soap operas, on _Telemundo._ But they were also both highly intelligent, analytical, and left leaning. They passionately discussed topics such as the state of affairs in the Middle East, race relations in the United States, and the collapse of the USSR. They also both loved a good game of chess. Sometimes, when Jamie couldn’t sleep, Claire would find him sitting up with John, brooding over a board.

Other than needing to be quieter in the bedroom, neither Jamie nor Claire minded John’s presence. He had a knack for being around without feeling like an intruder in their relationship. And, even Claire had to admit, it was nice to have someone around during the week; she had spent many years living alone, and John was a fun roommate. They often stayed up late, watching old black and white movies or playing _Scrabble._

At the end of January, Claire sent off the last of her med school applications. All she had to do was wait to see where the chips would fall. For Jamie, it was time to start making some decisions about his future. He still was feeling lost and unsure about what he wanted to do with his life. There were only two things that he was sure of: that he wanted to be with Claire and that he did _not_ want to go work for his Uncle Colum.

When March came around, an invitation arrived from Colum and Leticia, requesting that Claire and Jamie join them for lunch one Saturday afternoon. They reluctantly accepted, knowing that a showdown over Jamie’s future was inevitable.

"You really ought to have some idea of what you _do_ want to do with your life before you head into battle," Claire told him after they'd accepted the invitation; the lunch was two weeks away, and she was determined for Jamie to avoid conflict with his uncles altogether.

They sat on the couch together, Claire curled up next to Jamie, resting her head on his shoulder. "I told ye," Jamie teased. "I'm going wherever ye go."

"Are you going to be a professional boyfriend?" Claire asked. "That doesn't sound like a very profitable way to make a living."

"Hmmmppphhh," he said, nuzzling her ear with his nose. "Yer going tae be a doctor. Can't I just be yer house-husband?"

"Stop trying to distract me," she giggled, pushing him away. "Come on, Jamie, this is serious. We're graduating in two months and you don't have _any_ idea what you want to do with your life."

He stiffened, and Claire could sense there was something he wasn't telling her. "What is it? Have you thought of something, Jamie?"

"Ye'll laugh. Besides, it's a stupid idea. I'd never actually get the job."

"Jamie, tell me."

"Weel, there was a recruiter from the CIA on campus last week. They were looking for students in the modern languages department; they need people who speak Arabic, ye ken? They're recruiting translators."

"Jamie, that would be amazing! It sounds perfect for you. Why do you think you don't have a chance?"

"I dinna ken. I would have tae take an aptitude test. They're holding one in the city next week."

"You should do it, Jamie. It can't hurt anything to just take the test and see what happens."

He shrugged. John wandered into the living room, then, and asked, "What test?"

"There's an aptitude test for jobs with the CIA next week, and a recruiter was encouraging Jamie to take it," Claire told him.

"The CIA? That sounds amazing! How awesome would it be to be a spy! Jamie, you have to take it!"

Jamie laughed. "It's no' for being a spy. It would just be an entry level position. Ye could take the test too, ye ken. It's no' just translators they hire. There's all sorts of analyst jobs, for looking into business dealings and such."

"You've really researched this, haven't you?" Claire asked. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I guess I'm a coward. I was worried ye'd get mad at me because it would mean I'd have tae move tae DC. And ye ken I want us tae end up in the same place. I dinna ken what I would do if we had tae be separated."

"Jamie, I would never get mad at you for finding something you're truly interested in," she took his hand and squeezed it firmly. "Whatever happens, we'll figure it out. Just take the test, Jamie."

"I'll take it too," John decided. "I have no idea what I'm going to do in two months either. Might as well take a swing at something."

***

They both ended up taking the test. It would be at least a week until they got the results. In the meantime, they found themselves in the lavish dining room of Colum and Letitia once again.

"Now, Claire," Colum teased from the head of the table. "Yer no' going tae pass out on us again, are ye?"

Claire gave him a terse smile and took a sip of wine. "Mmmm...this is quite good. What is it?"

"Ah!" Colum replied. "'Tis Rhenish, from my own vineyards in Germany."

She took another hearty sip and Jamie leaned over, whispering, "Careful, Sassenach. It's stronger than it seems."

"It's been far too long since we've seen the two of you." Letitia smiled in her practiced way. She was dressed to the nines in an elegant white pantsuit, making Claire feel woefully underdressed in her casual black jumper.

"Aye, we've just been verra busy," Jamie replied. "This duck is delicious."

Claire poked at her plate, pushing the food around. She hated duck.

"And graduation is just around the corner, lad," Colum pointed out. "Are ye ready tae come work fer me? I've got an office set aside fer ye already."

Jamie put down his fork and wiped his mouth with his napkin. "Respectfully, Uncle, I have tae decline yer offer, once again."

"Jamie," Letitia purred, "do ye ken how lucky ye are tae be given this opportunity?"

"Thank ye. I truly appreciate it, but I've already made up my mind," Jamie replied firmly.

Claire could feel the tension rising in the room. Jamie's fingers were drumming on the table as Colum stared him down. She couldn't stand uncomfortable silences. "Colum," she said. "You have a very eclectic collection of books. I noticed them when we were in the library - "

Colum, completely ignoring Claire, pointed his fork at Jamie. "What _do_ ye intend to do wi' yer life then, nephew?"

"I've got a few things in the works," Jamie replied. "Besides, we dinna ken where Claire is going for Med School next year, yet."

Colum gave a derisive snort. "Ye canna be serious? Ye've been dating this lass for, what, four months? And yer going tae ruin yer life for her?"

"Our relationship is none of yer concern," Jamie responded through gritted teeth.

Letitia chimed in. “Claire, yer a lovely woman. Surely ye can see the possibilities for Jamie. Ye wouldna hold him back.”

Claire looked up from her food thoughtfully. She glanced around the table. “I am going to med school, and if that means I have to move across the country, I will do that. That is _my_ decision. Jamie respects that. And I respect _his_ decision about what he wants to do with his life. I am not holding him back. He is the one who decided not to work for you, and I support him in that one hundred percent.”

Jamie grabbed her hand under the table and gave it a squeeze as Colum glared at her. “I think yer speaking out of place, lass. This is a family matter and perhaps ye ought tae stay o’ of it.”

Jamie pushed back from the table and stood. He pointed his finger directly at Colum as he spoke. “I have put up wi’ a lot of yer shite over my life, Uncle. But what I willna stand fer is ye treating Claire like anything less than the most important thing in my life. Ye’ll respect her, or ye’ll never see me again.”

Colum slowly stood, too, though Claire could tell it pained him. “My sister would be ashamed if she could see ye right now.”

Jamie leaned forward, eyes narrowed. “My _mother_ would be proud of me for standing by the woman I love.” He reached down and gently grabbed Claire’s arm. “We’ll be leaving now.” She stood with him and they walked away from the table.

As they waited for the elevator, Colum yelled after them, “If ye walk o’ of here, ye’ll never see another penny from me again.”

As the elevator dinged to announce its arrival, Jamie turned back to Colum. “I dinna want yer money, Uncle. I have everything I need.” He squeezed Claire’s hand as they stepped onto the elevator.

The doors closed and Claire pushed Jamie against the wall, slamming her mouth into his and grabbing him between the legs. “What’s all this fer?” he managed to mumble into her mouth.

“That was so hot,” Claire breathed back into his. She gave his cock another squeeze and then pulled away just as the elevator reached the lobby. Jamie groaned and followed her out.

They rushed to get home, frustrated by the delays caused by traffic lights and train schedules. Claire clung to Jamie on the subway, teasing him and whispering in his ear as subtly as she could. She was driving him absolutely mad, as evidenced by the straining she could feel against his pants when he leaned into her.

They practically ran up the stairs when they reached her front stoop, fumbling with the keys in the door. Jamie was on her, kissing her and walking her backwards into the apartment. She had just started to paw at his clothes when he noticed John, sitting on the couch, out of the corner of his eye. Breaking away, he gave John a wry smile. “Hey, roomie.”

Claire gasped, her face flushing an even deeper shade of red. John smiled awkwardly. “Please, don’t let me interrupt you. I’ll just turn up the TV.”

Claire laughed nervously. “Well now it’s just awkward. I think the moment has passed.”

Jamie groaned and mumbled something under his breath in Gaelic, which made Claire and John laugh even more.

“If you’re done with your…. uh…. whatever, I do have some news for you, Jamie.” John told him. He was holding two envelopes in his hands.

Jamie plucked one out of John’s fingers and looked at it. Raising an eyebrow, he asked, “CIA?”

“Mine said they are interested in me. They’ll be calling me about an interview. How about yours?”

Claire came behind Jamie, looping her arm around his waist as he opened the letter. A smile broke out on Jamie’s face as his eyes skimmed the page. “Well?” Claire asked impatiently.

“They’re interested in me, too.”

Claire reached up to hug him, pulling him in close. “I’m so proud of you,” she said before kissing him gently.

“Dinna be proud of me yet. It’s just the first step.”

“It’s exciting, though, isn’t it?”

“Aye.”

“I know you two aren’t looking for jobs as spies,” Claire laughed, “but I can’t help picturing you both in suits, looking like the Secret Service.”

John stood up next to Jamie, and they both started talking into their sleeves to each other, as they’d seen the Secret Service do on TV. “Oh Lord,” Claire said, rolling her eyes. “When you lads are done playing, I’d like to order something to eat. Somehow, whenever I go to Colum’s I end up coming home with an empty stomach.”

***

In April, Jamie had his interview with the CIA, and Claire started obsessively checking the mail multiple times a day. She knew the decision letters from med school would start coming in soon, and the waiting was killing her.

“Ye ken ye canna _will_ the mailman come more quickly by pacing in front of the door, Sassenach?” Jamie teased her one Saturday. For him, the hard part was over; his interview had taken place the Thursday before, and he was ready to relax a little until he heard back from them. Unfortunately, it is hard to relax when your girlfriend is wound up like a spring.

She ignored him and continued pacing. “Ye’ll wear out the floor doing that!” he teased.

She put her hands on her hips and made a “Harummphhh” sound at him before continuing her pacing.

Enough was enough; Jamie could either continue watching Claire drive herself crazy for the rest of the day, or he could take matters into his own hands. Since there were benefits to the latter approach for both of them, he stood up and walked over to her. Without saying a word, he picked her up and threw her over his shoulder, much like he had the night he’d met her in November.

“What are you doing?” Claire protested. “James Alexander Malcolm MacKenzie Fraser, you put me down right now.”

“No,” he said, bringing her into her room and kicking the door closed behind him. He threw her on the bed, and she squealed.

"Jamie, what are you doing?" He had a wild look in his eyes that made her stomach muscles clench in anticipation.

"I'm gonna make ye forget about yer wee applications."

" _Wee_ applica -" she started off indignantly, but Jamie stopped her by crushing his mouth against hers.

He was on top of her, pulling down her pants down like a desperate beast. She writhed underneath him, pawing at the button and zipper of his pants. He pushed his jeans and boxers down and climbed on top of her. "I'm gonna fuck ye so hard ye forget yer name."

She opened her legs for him, and he slammed home, driving into her with reckless abandon. She wrapped her legs around his waist, crying out to him. Every thrust reverberated through her entire body as he bore into her.

He wouldn't last long like this, so he moved one hand between her legs, fingers assaulting her clit as he continued to drive into her. She felt her body start to tremble, a fiery heat burning within her from head to toe. When she tipped over the edge she screamed, lifting her head and biting down on his shoulder. He growled and spilled himself inside her, collapsing as his seed pumped into her.

He rolled off her and pulled her close, burying his nose in her hair and breathing her in. She closed her eyes and was just about to drift off when she heard the mail fall through the slot in the door.

Claire shot up, pulling her pants on and diving toward the door. Jamie groaned, " _Ifrinn_." He got up to follow her.

She stood in the doorway, holding four large manila envelopes. As he approached her, she held them out to him, trembling. He took the envelopes from her and read off the return addresses, "NYU, Columbia, Stanford, and Harvard."

"Do you think I got into all of them?" she asked hoarsely, her mouth suddenly gone dry.

He began opening each of the envelopes, one by one. "Aye," he answered, skimming the letters. A broad smile broke across his face as he lifted her off her feet and spun her around. "Aye, Sassenach. I'm so proud of ye," he said, kissing her.

Her own smile felt like it might be permanently plastered onto her face. "That's four down!" she said. "I still have Cornell, Yale, UVA, and Johns Hopkins."

"Dinna fash," Jamie said, holding her around the waist, "I ken ye'll get intae all of them. Christ, I'm in awe of ye. How did I end up with such a smart lass?"

"Right place at the right time, I suppose," she answered, returning his embrace and resting her head on his chest.

As happy as she was, she couldn't help but worry about the rest of the acceptance letters; especially with Jamie’s recent job interview hanging over her head. She'd seen the way his eyes lit up by the prospect of that job; if he got it and she didn't get into Johns Hopkins, where would that leave them?

She thought about the fight they'd had in November over this very topic and knew that at this point she was in too deep with him for them to be parted. She couldn't even stand the long five days that they spent apart each week; there was no way in hell she would entertain the idea of a long-distance relationship. She needed him, needed his body close to hers, needed his touch.

"Are ye alright, Sassenach?" Jamie asked.

She looked up at him and smiled, "Yes I'm fine. I just love you so much." She hugged him tighter, and he didn't have to ask or say anything else. He just held her closer, conveying to her with his touch that everything would be ok.

***

A week later, Jamie got the call. He had been given a contingent offer to work for the CIA as a Junior Translations Analyst. There was still a comprehensive background check to go through, but he was on his way to what had become his dream job. John got a call the following day with an offer as a Business Analyst.

That Friday, when Jamie arrived at Claire’s apartment, he and John shared a high-five, and talked excitedly about their future jobs. Claire was happy for them, but she still hadn’t received news from Johns Hopkins. Jamie and John were making plans to be roommates while Claire worried that she would still be in New York, over 200 miles away from him.

“Sassenach,” Jamie said. He was sitting next to her on the couch and reached over to push her hair behind her ear as he spoke. “Dinna fash. Whatever happens, we’ll work it out.”

“I just don’t want to be apart from you. I won’t be able to bear it.”

“We willna be separated, no matter what happens with your applications. I promised you.”

“Jamie, you made that promise before you were offered your dream job.”

“My dream job is nothing compared to being with you.”

“Jamie, I – “

“Hush, _mo chridhe_. You shouldna worry about something that hasn’t even happened yet. And ye need tae trust me, anyway.”

“I do, Jamie. I trust you.”

Her worries ended up being all for nothing. The next day, her acceptance letter came from Johns Hopkins. Relieved and ecstatic, she thrust the letter into Jamie’s hands for him to read.

“This is wonderful news, Sassenach. I told ye it would all work out. Christ, I’m so proud of ye I could burst.”

“It’s not exactly in the same city where you’ll be working,” she pointed out.

Jamie rolled his eyes. “Claire, can ye no’ stop worrying? Plenty of people commute. We’ll find a place halfway between.”

Claire smiled at him, slipping her arms around his neck. “’ _We’ll_ find a place? Are you asking me to move in with you, James Fraser?”

“I am,” he replied, wrapping his arms around her waist. “But I dinna think I can tell John that I willna live with him, so…”

“So, we’ll all live together. I don’t care, Jamie, as long as I get to live with _you_.” She stood on her tiptoes to kiss him gently. “I am so relieved and happy and excited.”

“Aye,” he replied, “I canna wait to wake up next to ye every day, _mo ghraidh_.”

There were still plans to be made - an apartment to find, and graduation to get through - but in that moment, all Claire could see was their future together, and she couldn’t wait to start it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everything is coming together for these sweet bairns. One more chapter until the end of Part I :)
> 
> Chapter title this week is [Long Promised Road](https://youtu.be/RmAqpRFGzRQ) by The Beach Boys
> 
> So hard to answer future's riddle  
> When ahead is seeming so far behind  
> So hard to laugh a child-like giggle  
> When the tears start to torture my mind  
> So hard to shed the life of before  
> To let my soul automatically soar
> 
> But I hit hard at the battle that's confronting me, yeah  
> Knock down all the roadblocks a-stumbling me  
> Throw off all the shackles that are binding me down
> 
> Sew up the wounds of evolution  
> And the now starts to get in my way  
> So what if life's a revelation  
> If the mind speaks of only today  
> So real, the pain of growing in soul  
> Of climbing up to reality's goal
> 
> But I hit hard at the battle that's confronting me, yeah  
> Knock down all the roadblocks a-stumbling me  
> Throw off all the shackles that are binding me down
> 
> Long promised road  
> Trail starts at dawn  
> Carries on to the season's ending  
> Long promised road  
> Flows to the source, gentle force, never ending, never ending
> 
> So hard to lift the jewelled sceptre  
> When the weight turns a smile to a frown  
> So hard to drink of passion nectar  
> When the taste of life's holding me down  
> So hard to plant the seed of reform  
> To set my sights on defeating the storm
> 
> But I hit hard at the battle that's confronting me, yeah  
> Knock down all the roadblocks a-stumbling me  
> Throw off all the shackles that are binding me down  
> But I hit hard at the battle that's confronting me, yeah  
> Knock down all the roadblocks a-stumbling me  
> Throw off all the shackles that are binding me down  
> But I hit hard at the battle that's confronting me, yeah  
> Knock down all the roadblocks a-stumbling me  
> Throw off all the shackles that are binding me down
> 
> I'd love to see you  
> I'd love to see you  
> I'd love to see you  
> I'd love to see you  
> I'd love to see you


	16. (I've Had) The Time of My Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She approached him and reached out a hand to touch the broach at his shoulder. "Je Suis Prest," she said quietly, remembering the Fraser family motto.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, it's here! The final chapter of part I of Blood Sugar. Thank you so, so much to everyone who has come to love these characters as much as I do. I started this fic on a whim, imagining these two crazy kids meeting at a Red Hot Chili Peppers concert. I never imagined it would become the story of love, determination, and loyalty that it did.
> 
> This is not the end for our favorite couple (and their roomie John). In a couple of weeks, I will start posting American Pie, part 2 of this series. Make sure to subscribe to the [Blood Sugar Series](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1878061) to get updates on new content. You can also follow me on Twitter (@sassenach7471) for the latest and maybe even some wee previews over the next couple of weeks.
> 
> Special thank you to @charmingdearie for her incredible mood board work and @erinoutlander (check out her awesome fic [A Hopeless Place](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25872997/chapters/62866717)) for being my beta since the beginning. Also, thank you to the Whore's Brunch for always reading and flailing about this story right along with me.
> 
> Also, a note about comments. I read every single one of them, I promise. But it has become difficult to respond to all of them. If you're a reader of any of my other fic, you know that I write a lot, and it is getting to the point that I either write less or respond to fewer comments, and I think we all prefer the latter. I appreciate every comment you take the time to leave me, and will continue reading them all, but please understand that I might not respond to every one.

[ ](https://ibb.co/4mWZRDv)

**_May 23, 1992_ **

Jamie jolted awake in the wee hours of the morning at the sound of someone fiddling with the doorknob at the front of the apartment. He extricated himself from Claire’s embrace quickly and gently, trying not to wake her. She made a small groaning sound but rolled over without waking.

He quickly reached under the bed to grab the baseball bat he had placed there months ago, feeling a smug satisfaction at an old argument finally being won in his favor.

_It had been a quiet night for the two of them and they had laid together, limbs entwined after making love when they had heard a similar sound at the front door._

_"Jamie," Claire had gasped. "What was that?"_

_"I dinna ken," he had answered quietly, trying not to move so that he could hear better. "I'll go check it out."_

_He had climbed out of bed and then asked, "Do ye have some kind of weapon in here?"_

_Claire had looked at him like he had three heads. "A weapon? Of course not. You know I don't believe in guns."_

_Jamie had quickly pulled his boxers on. "It doesna have to be a gun. We’ll talk about this later."_

_He had tiptoed down the hall and into the kitchen, keeping the light off in hopes of going undetected. He quickly grabbed a knife from the knife block and crept back toward the door._

_Just then, the doorbell had rung and he nearly jumped out of his skin. Swiftly, moving as steadily as a panther, he moved toward the door and peeked out the curtain._

_Gillian stood on the stoop. It was raining and she was wearing nothing but a skimpy halter top and mini skirt._

_Jamie opened the door and let her in. She explained that she'd lost her apartment key at one of the bars she'd been to and her roommate wasn't home to let her in._

_Claire and Jamie had gotten her settled and went back to bed. As soon as they were curled up in each other’s arms again, Jamie had gently chastised her for not having a weapon in her room._

_"I just don't see the need, Jamie," Claire had argued. "I have proper locks on the doors, and this is a good neighborhood."_

_"How can ye no' see that you have to be safer, Sassenach? What if it had been a burglar tonight instead o' Gillian?"_

_"But is wasn't a burglar. It was just Gillian."_

_"But it **could** have been, mo chridhe, and I dinna ken what I would do if anything were tae happen tae ye." He had pulled her tightly against him and she could feel his fear in the rapid pace of his heartbeat._

_"OK, Jamie," Claire had whispered. "OK. I'll get a baseball bat if it will make you feel better."_

_She had gotten one and placed it under the bed. And it had sat there all those months, collecting dust._

_But now_ , Jamie thought. _Now I can finally say, 'I told ye so.'_

Wearing only his boxers, he crept slowly down the hall, keeping his back flat to the wall. Suddenly he heard the key turn in the lock and the door opened. A short man entered casually, in no particular hurry, tossing his keys toward the wall where they hit the floor. _What the devil?_

"What the devil?" the man said, in a crisp English accent. "Where did my table go?"

Jamie crept out of the shadows revealing himself to the man who yelled out, clutching his hand to his heart when he saw the nearly-naked, giant, red-haired Viking wielding a baseball bat looming before him.

"Who are you?"

"Who are _ye?"_

Claire came running down the hall then, wrapping herself in her bathrobe. "Uncle Lamb!" Jamie dropped the baseball bat and was suddenly acutely aware of his near nakedness.

Claire wrapped her arms around her Uncle, tears forming in her eyes. "Oh, don't cry, my dear," Uncle Lamb said. "You'll get me going, too."

Claire pulled away and sniffled. "I know. It’s just been so long. I've missed you terribly."

Jamie's heart melted a little at the tenderness between Claire and her Uncle. She had never expressed to him how much he meant to her or how acutely she missed him. He tried to slip away to give them some privacy, _and_ to put some pants on, but Claire grabbed him by the hand to stop him. Awkwardly, he joined her as Claire introduced them.

"Uncle Lamb, this is my Jamie." _A dhia!_ He still got butterflies in his stomach when she referred to him that way. _My Jamie_.

Jamie stuck out his hand to shake with Uncle Lamb, who began to apologize profusely for the intrusion. "I'm so sorry to have given you a fright. I got an earlier plane and it was too hectic to try to call. I thought I'd just sneak in and slip into bed quietly, so as not to disturb you. I see you're in the right hands here with Jamie though. He must have the hearing of a jungle cat."

Claire laughed, squeezing Jamie’s arm affectionately. "Yes he does and he moves like a cat too."

"Now, Claire," Lamb said. "Where did the table that was in the front hall go?"

Jamie and Claire looked at each other and burst out laughing.

***

After explaining to Lamb about John, they apologetically set him up on the couch. John had planned to stay with another friend while Lamb was visiting, but with his early arrival the apartment was at capacity.

Claire snuggled back into Jamie's arms. He was too keyed up to fall asleep right away. Kissing the top of her head, he whispered, "I love ye, _mo chridhe_. It made me so happy to see _you_ so happy with your Uncle."

"I didn't even realize how much I missed him until I saw him. It's been over a year."

"Aye, I just wish he hadna come in the middle o’ the night."

"Oh, about that," Claire said with a hint of gloating in her voice. "Your baseball bat is still useless. "

"Ye wee besom," he said, tickling her sides. "Ye'll pay for that."

Claire tried not to shriek as Jamie continued his assault on her ticklish spots. Before she knew it, he was on top of her, kneeling with his legs on either side of her. His face became more serious as he looked in her eyes.

She grabbed his face with both her hands and pulled him down for a languid, passionate kiss. Jamie began moving his hips ever so slightly as their tongues did a slow dance around each other. He leaned down and pressed his head on the pillow next to Claire’s ear. "You are my sun, Sorcha. Everything that is me revolves around you and I couldna live without ye."

Claire didn't have the same way with words that Jamie did, but she pulled his lips back to hers and tried to pour all her love into that single kiss. He pulled back up on top of her without breaking their kiss and ran his hands through her curls. When she finally pulled away, he whispered, " _Mo nighean donn_ ," before pulling her shirt over her head and kissing softly down her neck, her breasts, her stomach. She wiggled her pajama pants down as he pulled down his boxers.

He crawled back on top of her, taking her mouth to his again. He pushed her legs apart gently with his knee and gently sunk into her. They both groaned as they joined and found their rhythm.

They made love gently, both trying to convey their love for each other which each move, each touch. Jamie whispered Gaelic endearments that she didn't understand but still sent shivers through her body. She held onto him, running her hands up and down his scarred back.

They only picked up their speed when both were reaching their climax, Jamie grinding his pelvic bone against her in just the right spot. He grabbed her hand and they held onto each other as they met their peak together, gasping and moaning into each other's mouths.

Both sated and thoroughly exhausted, they fell asleep quickly, Jamie taking his position as the big spoon and whispering his sweet words into the back of her head as they drifted off.

***

They slept in the next morning and woke to find John having tea with Uncle Lamb. Jamie put the coffee on and settled down on the couch with Claire.

"So, what are your plans for the day?" Uncle Lamb asked.

"Well, we were planning on picking you up at the airport this afternoon," Claire answered, "but that's off the table now. We have to be in Long Island by four; Jamie’s family will be arriving then for his baccalaureate ceremony and dinner, but we have some time before then. Did you have anything in mind?"

"No, nothing in particular, dear; I was just hoping to spend some time with you. And get to know your beau."

"Well, that can be arranged. We have to head down to Penn Station around 2:30, so that gives us about four hours of quality time." Jamie got up and poured both of them a cup of coffee before returning to Claire.

Claire saw Uncle Lamb smile to himself as Jamie handed her the mug of coffee. "Thank you," she said as he sat down with her again, putting an arm around her.

"You got a new couch," Lamb observed.

"Yes," Claire asked, placing a hand on Jamie’s leg. "The futon was a little too small for this guy."

Uncle Lamb, short at only 5'6”, laughed. "I can see that." He sipped his tea and smiled again. "I have to say, I never would have pictured you falling for a giant, red-haired Highlander, but you two actually make a lovely match."

Claire flushed and sipped her coffee. The only person in the world more straight-to-the-point than her was her Uncle. "Yes," she said finally. "I think we do, too."

"I've watched Claire and Jamie since they got together," John chimed in. "I've never seen a pair more suited. It's like it was always meant to be." Not sure how to respond, Claire just cuddled in more closely to Jamie.

"So," Lamb said, "how shall we spend our quality time? Jamie, do you like board games?"

"Aye," Jamie said. "And we've got plenty here. Pick your poison."

"Scrabble?" Lamb asked.

"I'll go grab it," Claire said, getting up. "You set up the card table, Jamie."

By the time they had played several games of Scrabble, their bellies hurt from all the laughing. Claire and Jamie were the competitive ones, arguing over words and throwing each other dirty looks when one of them would play a high scoring word. Lamb and John were much more laid back and enjoyed observing the couple as they quietly racked up their own points.

They switched to Trivial Pursuit, which is where things got interesting for Claire. Uncle Lamb was a walking encyclopedia and clearly intended to wipe the floor with all of them, but Jamie was a powerhouse of knowledge. They were soon the clear leaders, leaving Claire and John far behind as they went toe to toe. Lamb won the first game, but Jamie beat him at the second. Lamb threw his hands up in defeat. Laughing he reached his hand out to Jamie. "You are a worthy opponent, Jamie." He smiled at Claire, and she understood that he was telling Jamie that he was worthy of Claire.

Eventually they had to break up the party so that Claire and Jamie could get ready to leave for Long Island. Claire had packed her bag already with her overnight things and her outfit for Jamie’s graduation the next day.

When Claire got out of the shower, Jamie was already sitting in the living room ready to go. She threw on a floral print dress and sandals, rubbing some mousse into her hair and letting it air dry. She called out, "I'm just about ready!" to Jamie as she threw her overnight bag over her shoulder.

She stepped out into the hallway and looked up to see Jamie standing by the front door in full Highland Regalia. She could swear that her heart skipped several beats at the sight of him. In all their time together, she had yet to see him in a kilt. It was a sight to behold; a plaid of reds and greens and blues was wrapped around his waist along with a sash flung over his shoulder and across his suit coat, tucked neatly into his belt at his waist. His hair was combed neatly, and his smile beamed when he saw the look on her face.

She approached him and reached out a hand to touch the broach at his shoulder. "Je Suis Prest," she said quietly, remembering the Fraser family motto.

Lamb broke her enchantment, exclaiming, "Oh, let me get my camera! I _must_ get a picture of this!" He rustled through his bag until he found it, and then had Jamie and Claire pose on the front stoop as he snapped several shots.

"Alright, Uncle Lamb. We really have to go now. We'll be back tomorrow afternoon, after Jamie’s graduation ceremony.”

"You look so amazing in that," Claire said when they were out of Lamb's earshot. "It's got me thinking very naughty thoughts."

"Aye, well, try to control yerself, Beauchamp. Dinna forget that we'll be sleeping in my dorm room with Rupert and Angus tonight."

Claire groaned. After a few moments she asked, "And what exactly _do_ Highlanders wear under their kilts?"

"That's for me to know and you to find out," he answered, giving her one of his signature blinking owl winks and leading her down the stairs to the Subway.

***

They met Jamie’s family on campus, and Claire found herself once again caught up in the Fraser family lovefest. “Och, Claire! Are ye a sight fer sore eyes!” Brian exclaimed as he enveloped Claire in a hug. He and Ian were also wearing kilts, and they all looked dashing, standing together.

Jenny took her turn for a hug. “Oh, it’s so good tae see ye, Claire.” Even though they had only been to Lallybroch one other time since Christmas, Jenny had made a habit of calling Claire at least once a week, and their phone calls typically went on and on, hiking up the long-distance bill.

“You look so happy and relaxed,” Claire remarked. Jenny and Ian had left the children home with Ian’s father, so this was a rare and highly needed occasion for them.

“Aye,” Jenny giggled. “I’m glad tae see ye both, but I canna wait to have some alone time wi’ my husband tonight, too.” Claire rolled her eyes and laughed at her.

Jamie’s godfather, Murtagh, was there as well, and the normally reticent man embraced Jamie, saying softly in his ear, “I’m sae proud of ye, _mo dhia mac_.”

The baccalaureate ceremony went by quickly. The dinner afterwards was put on by the school, and the whole family sat around the large table, joking and laughing, and toasting Jamie. Brian had brought some pictures of Jamie growing up that Claire hadn’t seen before, and they passed them around the table.

Being with Jamie’s family made Claire feel like a part of a whole. It was a strange feeling for her; growing up with Lamb they had been a pair, the two of them against the world, but with the Frasers it was as if she had the love and protection of a Clan. It filled her with a sense of safety and belonging that she had never known before. She reached over and squeezed Jamie’s hand under the table.

That night, they laid snuggled close in Jamie’s twin bed with Rupert snoring on the bunk above them. “Thank you, Jamie,” Claire said with a sigh.

“Fer what, _mo chridhe_?”

“For giving me everything I ever needed when you gave me your heart.”

“Claire, it’s you that has made _my_ life whole.” He kissed her forehead gently.

“I don’t know what I’d do without you, Jamie. You know that, right?” She pressed her body against him so that she could feel as physically connected to him as possible under their less than ideal circumstances.

“I’ll never leave ye, _mo ghraidh_. I promise ye.”

***

Jamie’s graduation the next morning was held outdoors; the weather was sunny and warm, thankfully. Claire had not gotten a good night’s sleep in Jamie’s cramped dorm room bed and she found herself wiggling quite a bit, trying to be at least _somewhat_ comfortable in the metal folding chair. She sat between Jenny and Brian, alternating between reading the program over and over and sitting up in her seat so she could try to make eye contact with Jamie amongst the graduates on the stage. He was wearing his kilt again, under his gown.

He sat near the front with the students receiving honors with their diploma. He had surprised Claire when he received his final transcript and showed her his 4.0 GPA. She hadn’t been surprised that he could do it, but he hadn’t made any indication that he was even close to graduating _summa cum laude_. She was so incredibly proud of him.

When Jamie’s name was finally called, the entire family stood and cheered; Murtagh put his fingers in his mouth and let out a loud whistle. Claire could see Jamie flush red as he walked across the stage to get his diploma. She thought he would hurry back to his seat to stop their cheering, but instead, he turned to the audience and held the diploma out to Claire as if to say, “This is for you.” Tears sprang to her eyes and Jenny reached out and grabbed her hand, giving it a squeeze.

After the ceremony, they pushed through the crowd to find Jamie. Luckily his height and red hair made him easy to spot. When he saw Claire, he picked her up and spun her around. “You’re a graduate now,” she said.

“Aye,” he replied as he put her back on the ground. “It’s time to start the rest of our lives together.”

“Not quite yet,” Claire said. “I still have my graduation tomorrow.”

He kissed her then, a little too long and hard for a kiss in front of the family. “Just a formality,” he said. “All right, should we get going?”

They first went to Jamie’s dorm room, which had to be vacated by the end of the day. He had carefully sorted his things into boxes that would be going home to Lallybroch and boxes he was taking with him to Claire’s apartment; he would be staying there with her until they moved to the Baltimore/DC area. Once the car was loaded up, Brian drove them all back to Claire’s apartment. He dropped them off and left to check into their hotel in the city for the night, as the whole family would be attending Claire’s graduation ceremony the next morning.

***

Claire’s graduation ceremony was large and impersonal. It was held at Yankee Stadium, so Claire couldn’t even see her family in the stands, though she certainly heard them when they treated her to the same loud cheers as they had made for Jamie. It went on for ages, and Claire was extremely grateful when it was finally over.

They planned a late lunch at a restaurant near Claire’s apartment. Jamie seemed anxious on the way back, and when they finally arrived back at the apartment he started to pace, tapping his fingers against his leg, as everybody chatted. Claire took a deep breath, wondering if he was having second thoughts about them moving in together. The apartment was feeling way too crowded. Claire turned to Jenny, “Can we get going?” Jenny grabbed Brian and they all started to move toward the door. 

It was only a couple of blocks to the restaurant, so they all walked together. Claire walked with Jamie and held his hand, but he still seemed incredible tense, which put her on edge. Of course, she couldn’t get a moment alone with him to find out what was going on.

They were all seated at the restaurant and their drinks were served when Jamie stood clinked on his glass to get everyone’s attention. Once everyone was quiet, he began. “Claire, I want ye tae ken how proud I am of ye. And I’m so lucky that I met ye because I canna imagine what my life would be like wi’out ye in it. You inspire me with your strength, kindness, and intelligence. I dinna want to ken what the world would be like wi’out ye. And I never want tae know what my life would be like wi’out ye.”

As he bent down on one knee, Claire felt as if time was standing still. Her heart felt like it was going to pound out of her chest. “Claire, I’ve already told ye’ that I want tae spend the rest of my life wi’ ye. And I ken ye feel the same.” He pulled a small box out of his coat pocket and opened it to show her. “This was my mother’s ring. My Da told me he wouldna let me have it though, unless he was sure I had found the right girl. When I asked him tae bring it wi’ him this week, he didna hesitate. I ken yer the woman I’m meant tae be with. Will ye marry me, Claire?”

Tears were pouring down her face and she couldn’t find her voice, but she nodded vehemently and held out her left hand for Jamie to place the ring on her finger. Then he put his arms around her pressing his forehead to hers as they both cried with happiness.

Brian finally broke the silence by starting a toast of his own, followed by Uncle Lamb, and finally Jenny. Claire could hardly follow what was going on; her head was still spinning, and she pulled her chair close to Jamie’s and leaned against him.

Later, after the Frasers had left for home and Lamb had gone to bed, Claire climbed into bed with Jamie, relieved that they finally had a moment alone together. She fiddled absent-mindedly with the ring on her finger, still highly conscious of its presence. “I can’t believe you,” she said, smiling at him.

Jamie pulled her in close to him. “Did ye think I would be waiting much longer? I’ve wanted tae marry ye since the moment I carried ye out o’ that mosh pit. I think I actually demonstrated great restraint in waiting till today.”

“Still, you managed to surprise the hell out of me. You were so nervous I thought you were having second thoughts about moving in together.”

"Never." He kissed her sweetly. "I was just so nervous ye wouldna say yes."

"Never," she replied. "I can't wait to be Mrs. Fraser."

"Dr. Fraser."

"Well, eventually, but you do plan on marrying me before I finish med school, I hope?" She ghosted her finger in lazy circles on his chest.

"I'd marry ye right now, Sassenach. But I dinna think that's what ye mean. How long do ye want tae wait?"

"Hmmmm...how about next summer?"

"Sounds great. You pick a date and I'll be there. I love ye, _mo chridhe_."

"I love you too, fiancé."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [(I've Had) The Time of My Life](https://youtu.be/4BQLE_RrTSU)
> 
> Now I've had the time of my life  
> No, I never felt like this before  
> Yes I swear it's the truth  
> And I owe it all to you  
> 'Cause I've had the time of my life  
> And I owe it all to you  
> I've been waiting for so long  
> Now I've finally found someone to stand by me  
> We saw the writing on the wall  
> And we felt this magical fantasy  
> Now with passion in our eyes  
> There's no way we could disguise it secretly  
> So we take each others hand  
> 'Cause we seem to understand the urgency  
> Just remember  
> You're the one thing  
> I can't get enough of  
> So I'll tell you something  
> This could be love  
> Because I've had the time of my life  
> No, I never felt this way before  
> Yes I swear it's the truth  
> And I owe it all to you  
> Hey baby  
> With my body and soul  
> I want you more than you'll ever know  
> So we'll just let it go  
> Don't be afraid to lose control, no  
> Yes, I know what's on your mind when you say  
> "Stay with me tonight" (stay with me)  
> And remember  
> You're the one thing  
> I can't get enough of  
> So I'll tell you something  
> This could be love  
> Because I've had the time of my life  
> No, I never felt this way before  
> Yes I swear it's the truth  
> And I owe it all to you  
> 'Cause I've had the time of my life  
> And I've searched through every open door (never felt this way)  
> Till I found the truth  
> And I owe it all to you  
> Now I've had the time of my life  
> No, I never felt this way before (never felt this way)  
> Yes I swear it's the truth  
> And I owe it all to you  
> I've had the time of my life  
> No, I never felt this way before (never felt this way)  
> Yes I swear it's the truth  
> And I owe it all to you  
> 'Cause I've had the time of my life (I had time of my life)  
> And I've searched through every open door (you do it to me, baby)  
> Till I found the truth (you do it to me, baby)  
> And I owe it all to you


End file.
